Hilarious Christian rock video

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2008-03-06 01:10pm

It's by a band called "God Rocks" and it's called "I'm a Believer" (not to be confused with the Monkees song of the same name).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P0G3EP-WOqo

They may think they're inspirational, but I defy you to watch this video and not laugh.

Mr. Coffee · Post by **Mr. Coffee** » 2008-03-06 01:23pm

I couldn't even get 30 seconds into that, Mike. Shit like that is why Christian "Rock" should be punishable by a swift boot to the balls of everyone in the band that plays that shit. I mean, who the hell some Christians can go on about gay's being bad when their music acts all look like regects from a Pride Parade float is beyond me.

Kodiak · Post by **Kodiak** » 2008-03-06 01:26pm

As christian as I've ever been, I could never stand Christian Rock. It's ridiculous, highly hyppocritical, and exists to make other Christians feel ok with their guilt about listening to rock music. It reminds of the Southpark episode where Cartman became a Christian musician and his album went "Double-Myrrah"

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2008-03-06 01:29pm

In their defense they're not a rock group, instead they appear to be a piece of a much larger kids orientated multimedia series.

Mr. Coffee · Post by **Mr. Coffee** » 2008-03-06 01:30pm

Wicked Pilot wrote:In their defense they're not a rock group, instead they appear to be a piece of a much larger kids orientated multimedia series.

Who cares. Kill it. Kill it now. With FIRE!

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2008-03-06 01:34pm

No no young one, the best way to take down annoying Christians is with seady sex scandals. Extra points if there's homosexuality, coke, massages, or all of the above involved.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2008-03-06 01:42pm

It's the same vapid whoresound I would associate with bands like Busted. It's weird, because christianity certainly doesn't kill all creativity, but its modern american variant has a direct logical progression to the sappiest, most mindless dirge imaginable.

Havok · Post by **Havok** » 2008-03-06 07:23pm

Mike. I'm going to have to punch you if we ever meet for making me watch that.

How the hell did you find that? Do you go looking for this kinda stuff?

What the fuck is up with their hair?

The Spartan · Post by **The Spartan** » 2008-03-06 07:25pm

I made about 20 seconds...

That was bad even by Christ-rock standards. And I use the word rock in the loosest possible sense.

Mr. Coffee · Post by **Mr. Coffee** » 2008-03-06 07:50pm

havokeff wrote:What the fuck is up with their hair?

No shit... I saw the singer's hair and thought this was some sort of bizarre Jesus-themed DBZ cosplay gone horribly wrong(er).

YT300000 · Post by **YT300000** » 2008-03-06 08:06pm

Mr. Coffee wrote:
havokeff wrote:What the fuck is up with their hair?
No shit... I saw the singer's hair and thought this was some sort of bizarre Jesus-themed DBZ cosplay gone horribly wrong(er).

Bah, even in that department they fail miserably. Compare to a real band.

But this completely pales in comparison to Mortification, the Christian Death Metal band. I'd dedicate it to Rye, but I'm sure he already knows of them.

To be fair though, their sound is distressingly thin.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2008-03-06 09:18pm

Not to derail the thread, but yeah, I know of Mortification (they're not that bad, despite the early 90s assy production values [though I certainly wouldn't buy any of their stuff]), though even more perplexing is Christian Black Metal or "unblack" metal. Most of that genre is ass (as is normal black metal, but unblack is worse), but the Redemption Process by Anorexia Nervosa is an excellent album (and paints redemption and finding God in a good light for lyrical purposes, I don't think any of the members were actually christian, it was just a "concept" the album was about) and is considered "unblack".

I heard a Brazilian band today called "Occult Mourn" who apparently have an album called "Our war is only against Hell". I actually think they're okay as far as christian music goes, I mean, black metal is full of retarded messages (the overwhelming majority of which are extremely antichristian, considering this is the genre that spawned the norwegian church burnings), and these guys are choosing to be the outsiders of a genre defined by outsiders. That's pretty funny, as is pissing off "True Kvlt" BM fans.

I've never met any christian black metallers, but I know they exist, most of them seem a bit loopy. I don't know why you'd feel compelled to preach through christianised black metal, I would expect them to be religious liberals and generally address Tolkienesque stuff, but apparently not.

Gil Hamilton · Post by **Gil Hamilton** » 2008-03-06 10:02pm

Gads, this is just more proof that all the best bands are affiliated with Satan.

And what the hell is it with Christian Rock and hair gel? Is that the safe sanitary version of getting a tattoo or a piercing?

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2008-03-06 11:11pm

For some reason this reminds me of those YTV music things they had when I was a kid. I just gotta shake my head and go "dear god, why??"

Metatwaddle · Post by **Metatwaddle** » 2008-03-07 02:07am

It's painfully unoriginal and pretty thin (more pop than rock). The lyrics suck and the presentation is worse. But I didn't think it was aurally offensive - just boring and hackneyed.

Darkevilme · Post by **Darkevilme** » 2008-03-07 05:15am

I think i've discovered a mild masochistic urge...i watched the first 40 seconds, then i went back watch the rest cause i was curious...i knew it was going to be bad though so why....its also that kind of music i really have to focus to listen to otherwise it becomes background noise, the kind of background noise you're somewhat relieved when it stops.

Executor32 · Post by **Executor32** » 2008-03-07 06:09am

I think I died a little inside from watching that. On the bright side, at least the girl was cute, in a creepy Jesus-pop kind of way.

Zor · Post by **Zor** » 2008-03-07 04:49pm

aerius wrote:For some reason this reminds me of those YTV music things they had when I was a kid. I just gotta shake my head and go "dear god, why??"

I was going to second this, it reminded me of a Slime themed game show that they had around 1995 more than anything.

Zor

Adrian Laguna · Post by **Adrian Laguna** » 2008-03-07 06:21pm

Interestingly, my sister doesn't like Christian songs, she says they make her feel uncomfortable. I think it's funny that she's more religious than I am, but she won't listen to Possum Kingdom by the Toadies because of the line, "So help me Jesus". She made me change the station when that song came-up, and the Toadies aren't even a Christian rock band.

YT300000 · Post by **YT300000** » 2008-03-07 10:41pm

What makes the least sense is how bands that don't fall under this Christian sub-genre write much better songs about God than those who do. For example, here's Presence of the Lord, with Clapton and Winwood a few months ago. And yes, this is originally from the album that had a naked 11 year old girl on the cover.

Gil Hamilton · Post by **Gil Hamilton** » 2008-03-08 09:02pm

Adrian Laguna wrote:Interestingly, my sister doesn't like Christian songs, she says they make her feel uncomfortable. I think it's funny that she's more religious than I am, but she won't listen to Possum Kingdom by the Toadies because of the line, "So help me Jesus". She made me change the station when that song came-up, and the Toadies aren't even a Christian rock band.

Wait wait wait... wait... it's a song about a serial killer doing in little girls and she's disturbed about the "So help me Jesus" line?

wautd · Post by **wautd** » 2008-03-09 08:01am

Praise Jesus!

Joviwan · Post by **Joviwan** » 2008-03-09 03:04pm

Executor32 wrote:I think I died a little inside from watching that. On the bright side, at least the girl was cute, in a creepy Jesus-pop kind of way.

You thought she was cute?

And.. Wow. Yeah, have to echoe the sentiments here. It's a terrible premise for a song with stupid and mundane lyrics, performed by people who aren't playing their instruments and who can't actually sing.

Wyrm · Post by **Wyrm** » 2008-03-09 07:19pm

I had to go find the Monkees' version to reprogram myself back into sanity.

[singing]
"Then I saw her face.
Now I'm a believer!
Not a trace
of doubt in my mind!"
[/singing... terminated curtly by a boot to the head]

Big Phil · Post by **Big Phil** » 2008-03-09 08:21pm

They're Canadian

So sad...