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Today around 12:30 I went down to the kitchen to make myself a sandwich for lunch. After putting it in the microwave that's located in the adjacent breakfast nook, I saw a very large and very scary spider near the steps.

I called down Utsanomiko to catch it, since I'm just terrified of spiders. He caught it in a glass and used a notepad to get it off the floor. It's still sitting on the island counter in the kitchen, and we decided to take pictures of it to show you all what kind of horrible monster we had to deal with, but mostly because we were bored.

Anyway, here it is:



Uts had to use one of the widest-rimmed glasses in the cabinet, because this bastard has a legspan of at least 2.5 inches, easily.



This is the spider compared to Utsanomiko's hand. As you can see, it's quite a specimen.



TERROR SHOT!! RARGH!! Also note the container of curry powder that I used for my sandwich in the background.

Unfortunately, this was only the second spider like this that was found today: I caught one that was about the same size in the laundry room at around 2:30 AM. We've been getting quite a few bugs in the house from the addition and the utility work that's being done in the basement, and because we live outside city limits and are surrounded by woods.

Just thought you'd want a little peek into the adventures Uts and I sometimes have to go through.

[AD&D Reference]Watch out for those spiders! Some of em cast Melf's Acid Arrow![/AD&D Reference]

Holy crap... that is a big spider!

Shit. Looks like those spider assassins have failed again....








You didn't hear that.

Your little brother had to rescue you?

Dalton wrote:Your little brother had to rescue you?

If I saw a spider like that I'd call my little brother over. That way I can find out how dangerous the spider really is before trying to remove it myself.

Fuck, that thing is Huge.



You should try throwing some other bugs in there, see how they interact, that's always a lot of fun.

Yeah, I have way too much time on my hands.

Wait until it gets its big sister Shelob on your ass.

Hey Uts, tell him that you see a spider and then tickle the back of his neck. It'll scare the shit out of him.

Beware the Drow.

That's a big fucking spider! How long are you going to keep it?

To kill a spider of any reasonable size, you need:

1. 1 large dictionary
2. the strength to lift said dictionary
3. the ability to approach said spider
4. a paper towel
5. some water

Steps to kill said spider:

1. lift dictionary
2. swing dictionary at spider or drop dictionary on spider
3. remove dictionary from surface
4. wipe up mess with water and towel

That's a pretty big spider.

No, don't kill it; subvert it!

Got a burglar? The cops will never suspect that you were controlling the spider that bit him!

That is pretty damned big indeed.

We get giant house spiders (yes, thats the actual name) in our house fairly regularly (albeit seasonally), but they are not as nasty as that thing. Just as big, but they're terrified of people and just generally not as evil.

Say, how long are you going to keep it around? And what do you plan to do with it?

Well, Ungoliant there was actually disposed of by our dad sometime this evening (smashed it and threw it away).

Our parents are pretty tiffed about this, and they plan on charging the contractors for the cost of what it's going to spray the house...

On a note that is a harmless Tarantula!

That is a big spider though. BTW now you know what scared Little Miss Muffet! In Austrailia they have spiders that are very deadly that get that size.

They come in from outside, friend.

Except that we don't have tarantulas in Iowa...

Howedar: I know they come in from outside. But it's the contractors fault for letting them in.

Spanky The Dolphin wrote:We don't have tarantula's in Iowa...

Howedar: I know they come in from outside. But's it's the contractors fault for letting them in.

Are you sure of that? Some Tarantulas live in a varity of places. I have A bug book and I will look this one up but I am sure that that monster is perfectly safe.

Its ironic, the spider that are the most dangerous in North America are the smaller ones(Black Widow and The Brown Recluse{often called in slang a hobo spider}). But it would hurt if that bugger bit you!

That isn't a tarantula. Its a bog-standard spider, albeit a large one.


Spanky, my family built a house. You couldn't keep a cat out a lot of the time, let alone something as small and sneaky as a spider. Shit, you can leave the front door open for five minutes and get a spider in the house.

Its fairly hard to tell exactally what it is but it is not a Wolf Spider. The Image is too fuzzy for me to tell what it is excatly of than it is a large Ground Spider.

Well, it's the contractor's fault for leaving the door open all the time and not plugging the holes and pipes that they worked on that's letting all of the bugs in. Spiders like that only get in once every few years, but we found two today alone because of them.

We don't get bugs in the house too often, but we've been getting a lot since they've been working...

And I don't really care what kind of Spider it is or if it's harmless or not: It's still a Goddamn huge spider, and that scares the shit out of me.

Howedar wrote:That isn't a tarantula. Its a bog-standard spider, albeit a large one.


Spanky, my family built a house. You couldn't keep a cat out a lot of the time, let alone something as small and sneaky as a spider. Shit, you can leave the front door open for five minutes and get a spider in the house.

You must have seen one before because my book's version of that spider didn't look right.