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http://www.ctrlaltdel-online.com/?t=arc ... 2005-03-04

Hahaha. It does make sense, if you think about it. Why would a hot blonde chick date and marry a guy older than her? Because he can stretch and alter his body. I'd imagine getting fucked by Thing would hurt alot. Rock penis, people. Rock penis.

Copied from mallrats! Unoriginal bastards!

Rye wrote:Copied from mallrats! Unoriginal bastards!

Yes, because no one has ever used movie trivia in a comic strip before.

"Hey baby, how do you feel about big rockets with poor protection?"

the real question is has mr. fantastic ever given himself oral sex?

Darth_Zod wrote:the real question is has mr. fantastic ever given himself oral sex?

And has he ever dick-slapped someone... from across the room?

Maxim did it best, when they asked Stan Lee this very question.

Dalton wrote:Look how fucking Fantastic I am!

That's some funny shit.

DPDarkPrimus wrote:

Darth_Zod wrote:the real question is has mr. fantastic ever given himself oral sex?

And has he ever dick-slapped someone... from across the room?

Considering his seemingly unlimited stretching ability, I would say he's able to give himself anal sex as well. Probably he may also stretch his penis into two or three branches, giving a new meaning to "threesome" or "foursome" (albeit only the original "main" branch can ejaculate).

EDIT: I believe, before we speculate anything, we have to answer this question first: does the penis of Mr. Fantastic retain the elasticity during erection? Or it just behaves like any other penises that become more rigid and less elastic during erection?

Supposedly, Larry Niven wrote an essay on the erotic potentials of Mr. Fantastic's abilities that rivaled the hilarity of "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex", but I've yet to find a printed copy of this supposed work.

The comic books never say, of course, but that hasn't stopped 40 years of speculation.

As to why hot, blond chicks date and marry older men who can't stretch... usually it has to do with money.

Doesn't matter how long he can stretch it, because we all know it doesn't matter how long the bat is, you can't hit home runs without a thick barrel.

Darth Fanboy wrote:Doesn't matter how long he can stretch it, because we all know it doesn't matter how long the bat is, you can't hit home runs without a thick barrel.

I'm sure he can handle that too.


No one has brought up the kinky aspect of a woman who can do all that the Invisible Woman can do.

I remember an episode of F4 where Iwoman had some split evil personality that was stomping on her teammates using her forcefields etc, whilst clad in very sparse clothing. And at the end of the episode Mr F decides he really likes the look, and she turns them both invisible...

Tsyroc wrote:I'm sure he can handle that too.


No one has brought up the kinky aspect of a woman who can do all that the Invisible Woman can do.

I've never seen Mr. F be able to increase the circumference of his various parts though. But I also haven't read a lot of FF for a while either. You get double points though for the invisible woman part though. That would be the ultimate erotic tease. Especially if she can fade in/fade out with some candlelight, maybe watching and being totally unable to see her as she sits in your lap, and slowly stars unzipping your....



I gotta go for a while.

Yeah, mr fantastic can definately expand girth as well, he does it when he's fighting Onslaught.

Sex with the invisible woman reminds me of the bit with the succubus in ghostbusters. When I was a kid that scene played a lot on my fragile little mind.