Pastor charged after calling Bible a 'bomb' at airport

Mitth`raw`nuruodo · Post by **Mitth`raw`nuruodo** » 2004-10-20 06:36pm

Deltona pastor charged after calling Bible a 'bomb' at airport

Associated Press

NASHVILLE, Tenn. - A Seventh-day Adventist pastor from central Florida says he was "just kidding" when he told airport security he had a bomb, reached into his luggage and pulled out a Bible, declaring, "This is my bomb."

Jose L. Gonzalez, a citizen of Spain who is living in Deltona, was arrested and charged Sunday with making a false statement.
The incident occurred as security screeners at the Nashville International Airport were searching his carry-on bag.

Gonzalez, a passenger on an Orlando, Fla.-bound Delta flight, had already raised suspicion when screeners found a laptop computer that he said at first he didn't have.

An investigation determined that Gonzalez did not pose a threat, but the FBI still arrested and charged him with making the statement.
"Upon being questioned by airport security officers about the above episode, Gonzalez admitted having said that he had a bomb," a federal criminal complaint states, "but insisted that he was just kidding.

"He claimed he had used the term 'bomb' as a way of referring to the Bible as having the ability to change one's life," the complaint states. "He admitted that it had been stupid and that he had not intended any harm."

U.S. Magistrate Judge Cliff Knowles presided over Gonzalez's initial court appearance Tuesday and advised him that, if convicted, he faces up to five years in prison and a potential fine of $250,000.

Assistant U.S. Attorney Trey Hester did not ask Knowles to keep Gonzalez in custody pending his trial, citing "the rather unique facts of this case."

And Gonzalez's public defender, David Baker, asked if the defendant could continue his work-related travel in Tennessee, Florida, Arkansas and Virginia on behalf of the Seventh-day Adventist's General Conference, which oversees its worldwide operations.
Knowles agreed, as long as Gonzalez gets prior travel approval from U.S probation officers.

Gonzalez was released on a $10,000 unsecured bail, meaning that he would be liable for that amount if he misses a court date.
Gonzalez had little to say at the brief court hearing, and although he speaks English, he relied on an interpreter throughout the proceedings.

Post by **Kuja** » 2004-10-20 06:50pm

"You can't say bomb on an airplane!"

"You know, I was in the airforce once...I was a BOMBadier!"

DPDarkPrimus · Post by **DPDarkPrimus** » 2004-10-20 06:50pm

He was a moron and got called on it. Case closed.

Bob the Gunslinger · Post by **Bob the Gunslinger** » 2004-10-20 06:54pm

Aw, they only busted him because the flight staff was composed of vampires.

Can Ah get a Gawd-Bomb??! Halleluja!

General Zod · Post by **General Zod** » 2004-10-20 06:59pm

what a fucking moron. people should realize by now that you do not joke in an airport about bombs.

Post by **Kuja** » 2004-10-20 07:04pm

"Ba-bomb-bomb-bomb-ba-bomb-bomb-ba-bomb!"

Post by **fgalkin** » 2004-10-20 07:06pm

Airport Security: Pwning fundies and idiots since 2001.

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2004-10-20 08:35pm

You do not make bomb jokes at the airport and then pull shit out of your luggage unless you're under the age of 10, he's lucky he wasn't beaten and/or shot. For all they know the bible could've been a book bomb, similar in principle to the Unibomber's mailbombs and just as deadly. Airport security is not known for a sense of humor, especially after 9/11.

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2004-10-20 08:45pm

It's amazing these people still exist. I remember when there was a case of a bomb joker at an airport nearly every month at one point. As if you don't notice how stupid this is.

SyntaxVorlon · Post by **SyntaxVorlon** » 2004-10-20 08:52pm

Reminds me of the Moron, er mormon, who got arrested for shouting "I've got a BOM(Book of Mormon/Morons)" in some public event, townmeeting or something.

Korvan · Post by **Korvan** » 2004-10-20 08:53pm

In the back of my mind I'm tempted to declare some Myrrh at customs. When they ask what that is, I'd reply it's a balm. I think it'd be funny, but not funny enough to go through a rectal search.

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2004-10-20 09:47pm

Korvan wrote:In the back of my mind I'm tempted to declare some Myrrh at customs. When they ask what that is, I'd reply it's a balm. I think it'd be funny, but not funny enough to go through a rectal search.

Just be sure to speak slowly and clearly and enounciate. You probably won't get the full body cavity search, but chances are if they don't find it funny they'll open up all your luggage and stripsearch you.

Prozac the Robert · Post by **Prozac the Robert** » 2004-10-21 05:00am

Is there any recorded incident of someone telling the security people they have a bomb when they are planning to blow themselves up?

The Duchess of Zeon · Post by **The Duchess of Zeon** » 2004-10-21 05:11am

Prozac the Robert wrote:Is there any recorded incident of someone telling the security people they have a bomb when they are planning to blow themselves up?

Only after they have already taken hostages.

P.S. I think he was serious, in a way--I have heard the Bible descripted by some wackjob Protestant types as "the atomic bomb of spiritual warfare."

PainRack · Post by **PainRack** » 2004-10-21 08:59am

fgalkin wrote:Airport Security: Pwning fundies and idiots since 2001.

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

Don't be stupid. You do know that its against US Federal Law to make a false declearation of terror threats? And that this law was set up even before 9/11?

Iceberg · Post by **Iceberg** » 2004-10-21 09:29am

This guy was a fucking moron. During my pre-9/11 choir trip to Europe, at every American airport we made a stopover in, every five minutes there was an announcement to keep your bags with you at all times, not let them out of your sight, etc. It's been a federal crime since FOREVER to make bomb threats at an airport. This guy got pwn3d and he deserved it.

jegs2 · Post by **jegs2** » 2004-10-21 09:51am

Sounds like the fellow is learning a hard lesson -- suppose there are actually folks out there who think they can joke about a bomb at an airport or on an airplane. Even before 9/11, even mentioning the word, "bomb" at an airport could get you arrested. In '99, I made an off-handed comment about bombs to an airline ticket agent, and he looked at me and said, "You know I could put you in jail for that." My wife looked ready to curb-stomp me. The fellow was a former Marine, so he cut me some slack and warned me against spewing stupidity in the future.

After 9/11, you're lucky not to get the "Rodney King treatment" for mentioning the word, "bomb" in an airport.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2004-10-21 10:01am

He's obviously an imbecile, and he should be treated accordingly.

Julhelm · Post by **Julhelm** » 2004-10-21 11:45am

Agreed.

Korvan · Post by **Korvan** » 2004-10-21 12:34pm

aerius wrote:
Korvan wrote:In the back of my mind I'm tempted to declare some Myrrh at customs. When they ask what that is, I'd reply it's a balm. I think it'd be funny, but not funny enough to go through a rectal search.
Just be sure to speak slowly and clearly and enounciate. You probably won't get the full body cavity search, but chances are if they don't find it funny they'll open up all your luggage and stripsearch you.

Well, I know from experience that german airport security in pre-911 Hannover have a good sense of humor. I had purchased a replica Mauser pistol and had placed in my main luggage. Airport regulations allowed unload firearms, so I thought there would be no problem. What the regulations didn't say is that you should probably mention that you have the guns.

As I went to board the plane, I was pulled aside by a gorilla of a security guard (a dead ringer for the "steroid" guard from Running Man) and was taken down to the baggage area. I saw my luggage in an X-Ray machine with the Mauser cleary visible on the screen. I didn't know much german, and the guard didn't know much english but I was able to get across that the gun was non-functional. The guard seemed to think this was insanely funny and had me wave the gun in the air while all the baggage crew got to laugh at me.

But, man was the British flight attendant ever pissed (British airways flight to London), though the first thing he asked me was if I was an American. I said no, but that I had watch a lot of american TV.

Mange · Post by **Mange** » 2004-10-21 01:18pm

What a moron. He has only himself to blame.

BlkbrryTheGreat · Post by **BlkbrryTheGreat** » 2004-10-21 01:30pm

The Bible is more powerful then any bomb; it won't just take your life, it will take your sanity as well!

Axis Kast · Post by **Axis Kast** » 2004-10-21 04:26pm

What a moron. He has only himself to blame.

I concur.

Last time I was at the airport, some idiot kid - he couldn't have been under ten - began ranting about how he shouldn't have to go through security because there weren't any bombs in his shoes. When his parents couldn't get him to shut up, he kept dancing around, and finally prompted the TSA guards to ask him to step out of line for a wand search. Held up the line for a good 15 full minutes, too, as everyone just watched in disgust.