American as Apple Cake: The Commie TGOD

[StarshipTitanic]

LMAO!!! My face hurts now...

[Sea Skimmer]

Suddenly, far out to sea there was a huge flash followed by the mighty freight train rumble of heavy artillery fire. The huge explosions ripped apart the Beatniks and liberal press who had dared challenged the man commanding the two great vessels. Senator B. R. Tillman and his Maximum Battleships had arrived. One mounting no less then twenty-four 16/50 caliber naval rifles in four turrets and the other fifteen 18/50 caliber naval rifles in five turrets.

The Great White Fleet hurried to the sides and the battleships turn to presented their full broadsides aginst the hippies and any isolationists that could be found.

Tag fix - Phong

[Pablo Sanchez]

Nixon stayed down, but LeMay rose again, his hordes of bombers blackening the sky...artifical night fell as Reagan and the New Communist Man squared off in the plaza...

New Communist Man realized that this was a fight he could not win. He dropped into a crouch and shielded his face with his hands.

"Not in the face! Perestroika! Glasnost! I'm willing to compromise on the nukes. In fact, I want to set the limit even lower than you wanted!" he cried.

Within a few years, New Communist Man had faded sadly away, and capitalism seemed triumphant. But hark... what is this?

From the depths of the People's Republic China comes a Second New Communist man, an implacable force of Maoist pseudo-Communism and Chinese Nationalism. Perhaps the classic New Communist Man has lost the day, but the immutable forces of world economics will find greater and greater power concentrated in the hands of the new New Communist Man!

From the island of Cuba storms Fidelismo, a man in a beard and combat fatigues, always ready to excoriate los yanquis del norte and spread revolution through latin America! From North Korea comes Psychopathic Dictator, perhaps the bad effect of corrupted Communism, but with an insane willingness to brave the dangers of world revolution. Charlie still crouches in the Vietnamese bush, gathering strength for his final revenge! The shadowy and mysterious hero called Creeping Socialism continues to consolidate his power on the European continent.

Today, decadent Capitalism has won... but what of TOMORROW?

The End...
???

[phongn]

The New Communist Man had been defeated, but now? The Asian Tigers and the Cubans were rising again, a new threat thread to the stronghold that was once Europe ... and a cowboy for the American president.

But Charlie....poor Charlie had been seduced by the once-hated Americans. Even as bomb craters still remained unpaved in memory of the great air campaigns; even as SA-2 and SA-3 batteries pointed to the sky ready to defend Hanoi against another attack ... the youth was turning to the West. Coca-cola vendors hawked their goods, billboards proclaimed the virtues of Microsoft Windows. Modern Airbus airplanes landed at the international airport near Saigon. Charlie was being transformed from the scourge of GI Joe into a friend of America.

North Korea remained defiant, but her peoples were dying, slowly. Could the Great Leader with his superhuman strength oppose the decadent Republic of Korea? Could he continue to flout all around him, even as the Maoists turned away?

Fidelisimo turned old and signs of reconciliation strengthened, it was only a matter of time until communism left the Island and hordes of Americans landed at the Bay of Pigs - but rather than rifles they would carry the most dangerous instrument of all. The Dollar.

But Creeping Socialism was winning Europe, slowly transforming it into the worker's paradise. The militaries were unionized, the garbarge workers were unionized ... everyone was unionized and state health care bought the votes of the masses. Soon...a touch of red here and there and Europe would be theirs.

And the Maoists - their Second New Communist Man showed promise of victory through cheap goods...

[phongn]

Suddenly, far out to sea there was a huge flash followed by the mighty freight train rumble of heavy artillery fire. The huge explosions ripped apart the Beatniks and liberal press who had dared challenged the man commanding the two great vessels. Senator B. R. Tillman and his Maximum Battleships had arrived. One mounting no less then twenty-four 16/50 caliber naval rifles in four turrets and the other fifteen 18/50 caliber naval rifles in five turrets.

"So...Tillman has returned. Enough of this foolishness, his battleships shall be destroyed!" cried Billy Mitchel, arriving in a DC-3. From out of nowhere, hordes of ancient bombers droned through the sky. The Tillman Battleships looked in contempt ... but their radars would not function! Their gunnery refused to elevate and helm did not move.

Soon the bombers began dropping on the helpless targets... all the while the new New Communist Man looked silently, watching as the capitalists tore themselves apart.

[Pablo Sanchez]

Soon the bombers began dropping on the helpless targets... all the while the new New Communist Man looked silently, watching as the capitalists tore themselves apart.

The steroetypically inscrutable Chinese superhero stood in his peasants sandals and clothing. He assumed a stance reminiscent of the old New Communist Man's hopeful gazing towards the future, with the key difference that he was also assisting with farming and for some reason surrounded by children and peasants.

"You see? Only by unity of thought and action, like that given to us by the Great Chairman Mao, greatest leader in human history and perfect specimen of Communism, can we succeed. The capitalists are divided, and they fight amongst themselves. It is demonstrated that the things ignorantly demanded by the evil dunce traitors of the Democracy Wall movement and the Student movements can only lead to discord and a return to Guomindang rule," he declared confidently.

His 'sidekick,' Great Leader of North Korea, leapt up from where he had been laying and trying to recover from malnutrition and pulled a nuclear bomb from his pocket.

"I will SMASH the decadent United States and free the oppressed peoples of Southern Korea from the stinking rotten hand of the reactionary traitors!" the mad little man shouted.

New Communist Man shook his head sadly. The boy was too impetuous.

"Don't shake your head at me, revisionist bastard! I will smash all who oppose me!"