Let's play: SCRAMming up!

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Force Lord
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Force Lord »

"Mmmmph! Mmmmph!"
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by FaxModem1 »

Against better judgement, REPAIR GUY removes HISTORIAN's gag.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Force Lord »

"Uh, thanks. I think I'll just stay quiet now."
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by FaxModem1 »

"No problem, strap in, we're in for another famous landing."
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Eternal_Freedom »

STRAP IN.

LOOK BACK at WCDG

"Famous landing? Damn right! Insane piloting is what I do best! Now sit down and hold on, we're riding this sucker to the Gates of Hell and back!"
Baltar: "I don't want to miss a moment of the last Battlestar's destruction!"
Centurion: "Sir, I really think you should look at the other Battlestar."
Baltar: "What are you babbling about other...it's impossible!"
Centurion: "No. It is a Battlestar."

Corrax Entry 7:17: So you walk eternally through the shadow realms, standing against evil where all others falter. May your thirst for retribution never quench, may the blood on your sword never dry, and may we never need you again.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by FaxModem1 »

REPAIR GUY looks to IVAN IVANOV:

"We have permission to land or are we dodging incoming missiles and artillery fire as we approach?"
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Scottish Ninja »

CALL the AIR DEFENCE BATTERY. SEE if the GRU ANSWERS.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by PeZook »

CHAPTER 3: A HOLE IN THE ACE
February 23rd 2025
Sunday
Wheels Up + 00:26:34


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SIMULATION ENGINE RUNNING
TIMEFLOW INTERRUPTED
You are now: ZIXINUS, ETERNAL FREEDOM, PHANT, REPAIR GUY, LARGE WOUNDED DOG, COMBAT JANITOR, SMARMY AMERICAN SAILOR, TROPICAL BEAUTY, IVAN IVANOV, INSANE HISTORIAN, MAD SCIENTIST, CHEEKY BETTY, RI'ANN SHAPP, UNEXPECTED PASSENGER and FUCKER NEWTON (goddamn that's a lot of people!)

You are on a SPACEPLANE. The SPACEPLANE was recently on FIRE. You are at an ALTITUDE of 140 kilometres. You are not ASCENDING. You are in FREEFALL. You are WELL PAST the APOAPSIS of your TRAJECTORY.

Your UNEXPECTED PASSENGER seems to have WOKEN UP. He BEGINS to CHANT. The CHANT is OMINOUS. He draws the IRE of MAD SCIENTIST. Despite MAD SCIENTIST being DRUG INSPIRED he MANAGES to be SUSPICIOUS of UNEXPECTED PASSENGER'S motives.

His SUSPICIONS begin to BEAR FRUIT when the UNEXPECTED PASSENGER begins to SPONTANEOUSLY HEAL his HORRIBLE WOUNDS.

FUCKER NEWTON SCREAMS.

ZOMBIE PANIC BITES FUCKER NEWTON.

While EVERYONE is FOCUSED on UNEXPECTED PASSENGER and his SUDDEN and MYSTERIOUS HEALING, COMBAT JANITOR RUSHES to SAVE his FRIEND and NEARLY kills you ALL. AGAIN.

ZIXINUS PREVENTS COMBAT JANITOR from VOIDING your SPACEPLANE. AGAIN.

RI'ANN SHAPP is DRAGGED ABOARD by ZIXINUS. RI'ANN SHAPP is UNCONSCIOUS. RI'ANN SHAPP might be SUFFERING from HYPOTHERMIA and some other EXOTIC MALFORMATIONS caused by his LEAKING SPACESUIT. However, he has DRAWN a GRAPH on the SPACESUIT showing his MISSION was ACCOMPLISHED.

ETERNAL FREEDOM manages to REGAIN enough SENSES to LOCK OUT the INNER AIRLOCK DOOR.

MAD SCIENTIST realizes he should HELP. He BRIEFLY abandons EVIL PLANS towards UNEXPECTED PASSENGER and HELPS ZIXINUS do ARCANE CALCULATIONS.

ARCANE CALCULATIONS result in KNOWLEDGE you should be able to HIT OKHOTSK on your NEXT ORBIT provided the AUSSIES don't SHOOT YOU DOWN. Barring that, you will most DEFINITELY be ABLE to hit RUSSIA in GENERAL. It is not PARTICULARLY DIFFICULT.

While that HAPPENS, SUAVE PLAYBOY takes SHAMELESS ADVANTAGE of TROPICAL BEAUTY'S drugged-up STATE. They are INTRODUCING much CHAOS in the CABIN. As if it NEEDED any MORE.

REPAIR GUY begins to PANIC for no REASON. He FEARS that you are CRASHING. MAD SCIENTIST PROVES with MATH you are not, in fact, in DANGER of DYING due to MEETING some hard TERRAIN. Yet.

REPAIR GUY CALMS DOWN and REQUESTS some SPARE PARTS. SUAVE PLAYBOY tries to LOOK for SOME but is too BUSY molesting TROPICAL BEAUTY to DO that before RE-ENTRY BURN. Or AFTER.

ETERNAL FREEDOM performs the BURN with GUSTO. He TRIES to PRETEND it's pretty BADASS, but in REALITY he just PROGRAMMED the COMPUTER to do that.

You are FIFTEEN minutes from ENTRY INTERFACE. Things are GETTING quite NERVOUS.

SUDDENLY two THINGS happen at the SAME TIME.

REPAIR GUY STICKS his HEAD under the BURNED OUT FLOOR and ASCERTAINS the HYDRAULIC LINES leading towards the WINGS are COMPLETELY DESTROYED.

MAD SCIENTIST realizes you will SLOW DOWN to a SPEED that allows ATMOSPHERIC MANEUVERS some 400 KILOMETRES from OKHOTSK if you RE-ENTER on your CURRENT TRAJECTORY.

There is 8% of MAIN ENGINE FUEL left. There is NO ANSWER from the MISSILE DEFENCE BATTERY. They MIGHT be too CONCENTRATED on PLOTTING their FIRING SOLUTION to TALK.

You are THIRTEEN MINUTES from ENTRY INTERFACE.

What do you do? _
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JULY 20TH 1969 - The day the entire world was looking up

It suddenly struck me that that tiny pea, pretty and blue, was the Earth. I put up my thumb and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth. I didn't feel like a giant. I felt very, very small.
- NEIL ARMSTRONG, MISSION COMMANDER, APOLLO 11

Signature dedicated to the greatest achievement of mankind.

MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST does not mind BREAKING the SOUND BARRIER, because it is INSURED. - Simon_Jester considering the problems of hypersonic flight for Team L.A.M.E.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Simon_Jester »

MAD SCIENTIST says "Oh BALLS."

Consults with ZIXINUS and other RESPONSIBLE CREW MEMBERS, preferably including ETERNAL FREEDOM if he is back in BADASS PILOT MODE and out of RAVING LUNATIC MODE.

Considers: we can't maneuver the plane in atmosphere with the hydraulics shot out. We have no fuel left to do anything but reenter and pray the surface to air missiles don't hit us. We might at least be able to influence our point of entry.

Am I missing anything?
Spoiler
FUCKER NEWTON, being an ABSTRACT CONCEPT, is IMMUNE TO ZOMBIFICATION as far as I AM CONCERNED...
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by PeZook »

RCS thrusters will still work, so you can bank and pitch somewhat, like a beached whale. There is still a little time to shift the trajectory a bit, but it will consume fuel.
Image
JULY 20TH 1969 - The day the entire world was looking up

It suddenly struck me that that tiny pea, pretty and blue, was the Earth. I put up my thumb and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth. I didn't feel like a giant. I felt very, very small.
- NEIL ARMSTRONG, MISSION COMMANDER, APOLLO 11

Signature dedicated to the greatest achievement of mankind.

MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST does not mind BREAKING the SOUND BARRIER, because it is INSURED. - Simon_Jester considering the problems of hypersonic flight for Team L.A.M.E.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Simon_Jester »

Then we need a course that lines us up for a landing at Okhotsk as well as possible, bearing in mind that we will not be able to make major course changes quickly.

MAD SCIENTIST attempts to HURRY THE FUCK UP and WORK SHIT OUT.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by FaxModem1 »

REPAIR GUY, using his EXPERIENCE POINTS, JURY RIGS the HYDRALICS so that the RAVENSTAR can land.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Shroom Man 777 »

SMASH UNDEAD PANIC'S SKULL OPEN with a TURD STICK to SAVE FUCKER NEWTON and EARN HIS FAVOR and GRATITUDE
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Darkevilme »

SUAVE PLAYBOY will save the SPACEPLANE by sticking his TONGUE in TROPICAL BEAUTY's MOUTH.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Shroom Man 777 »

A LOOSE TURD FLOATS between SUAVE PLAYBOY's TONGUE and the TROPICAL BEAUTY's MOUTH

COMBAT JANITOR CACKLES
Image "DO YOU WORSHIP HOMOSEXUALS?" - Curtis Saxton (source)
shroom is a lovely boy and i wont hear a bad word against him - LUSY-CHAN!
Shit! Man, I didn't think of that! It took Shroom to properly interpret the screams of dying people :D - PeZook
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Eternal_Freedom »

RE-ENTER BADASS PILOT MODE. RAVING LUNCATIC MODE is now LONG FORGOTTEN.

DISCUSSES TRAJECTORY with MAD SCIENTIST and ZIXINUS. ADVOCATE a BURN to PUSH our TRAJECTORY CLOSER to OKHOTSK.
Baltar: "I don't want to miss a moment of the last Battlestar's destruction!"
Centurion: "Sir, I really think you should look at the other Battlestar."
Baltar: "What are you babbling about other...it's impossible!"
Centurion: "No. It is a Battlestar."

Corrax Entry 7:17: So you walk eternally through the shadow realms, standing against evil where all others falter. May your thirst for retribution never quench, may the blood on your sword never dry, and may we never need you again.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Force Lord »

HISTORIAN decides to take a NAP, despite the DANGER.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by doom3607 »

ATTEMPTS to CONTINUE CHANTING to FIX HYDRAULIC LINES. OR FAILING THAT, to MAKE THE FLAPS WORK WITHOUT THEM.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by FaxModem1 »

Spoiler
So, for the wings to work, we're relying on cultist magic plus whatever ingenuity REPAIR GUY has? We're all gonna die.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Simon_Jester »

We are also working on a BACKUP PLAN that involves use of the RCS ALONE, but this will probably NOT WORK.

MAD SCIENTIST is just GRABBING AT STRAWS here.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by doom3607 »

FaxModem1 wrote:Spoiler
So, for the wings to work, we're relying on cultist magic plus whatever ingenuity REPAIR GUY has? We're all gonna die.
Spoiler
Well, when you put it like that... :mrgreen:
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by FaxModem1 »

doom3607 wrote:Spoiler
Well, when you put it like that... :mrgreen:
Spoiler
Just being realistic and snarktastic :mrgreen: Then again, we seem to achieve minor miracles just by being alive, so what have you.



I just thought of something, if this group gets any bigger, we're going to need a second plane.
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by doom3607 »

Spoiler
Ravenstar-10 from the future, maybe? Complete with the standard survival supplies, not least of which the most powerful rifle in the world, that also needs only power to fire?
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Zixinus »

doom3607 wrote:Spoiler
Ravenstar-10 from the future, maybe? Complete with the standard survival supplies, not least of which the most powerful rifle in the world, that also needs only power to fire?
Spoiler
Actually I thought of that and I sort of worked out the pricing that not everyone will be going on every mission (ie, the coming moon mission: I sort of counted only on four crewmen alone).
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Re: Let's play: SCRAMming up!

Post by Simon_Jester »

Spoiler
Yeah. If we're charging millions of dollars per passenger, it is NOT cost-effective to take random idiots along, or dangerous people actively trying to kill us.

EDIT: Which four?
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