Dwarf Fortress: TallLabored Strikes the Earth! (sign ups)

[Slacker]

I'll happily contribute to goonery when the next wave of migrants arrive.

[Crossroads Inc.]

((cue music“Journey of the Sorcerer”))


It began with ore. Lots of ore.

Ever since the most recent flood of new comers to the valley, the cramped living conditions of the main outpost had been becoming more and more an issue. Dwarfs are naturally used to cramped quarters with little to no privacy. But even they had limits. At a meeting with Mr.Bean who had nearly recovered from his injuries, several of the newer Dwarfs were bickering.

"The Starpeople Are building a grand place for themselves Bean while we are forced to share what small rooms we have! Darkevilme has put all work behind building the great walls and left us few masons for expanding living quarters!" Vehrec of the new arrivals from SedNet bellowed as behind him stood some of the other newcomers, Votex and darthkom.

Mr.Bean sighed. He put his crutches to one side and sat down. And then picked up one of his Dwarfish Ax-pics.

"Ye be babies or ye be Dwarfs? Don't ye belly ache about the Starpeople, if ye want such accommodations ye can live out in the Sun with'em!" There was a sudden muttering from the group.
"Dat what I thought! Now if ye really want better rooms, go dig'em yeselves!" He barked, hurling the pic-ax at Vehrec. Catching it deftly, the Dwarf looked down abashed...


Some time later, as Vehrec and the others carved out a new level. Mr.Bean left his room for the first time in weeks, grinning like a maniac and carrying a large scroll.
"Lets see how me little projects been doing!"

"The Journal of Trisha McMillin"
It has been over a year since we have first crashed in this valley and in that time I have come to realize just how hard it is living in "simple" times. Lintilla and Lintilla seem to have adapted best, though I suspect it comes from their line of work as archeologists and studying the past. Lintilla however seems to spend more time studying with me as the two of us have devoted ourselves to incorporating as many modern advances into this primitive society as possible.

Ford and Zaphod, as always, spend much of their time boozing and brewing anything fermentable they can get their hands on. I am quite certain that Zaphod may bring about vast unforeseen consequences to Dwarfish society. Just yesterday I noticed several Dwarfs with mugs that contained tiny umbrellas and what looked like cherries on small toothpicks. Where they obtained tiny umbrellas remains a mystery.

Marivn is, Marvin. The Dwarfs natural respect of him may at last be doing some good. None of them have any sense on how to fix an android, but they have recently "spruced him up" as only they are possible. His once dull and grey exterior is now festooned with intricate metalwork and metal engravings of horrific scenes from their history.

Slartibartfast seems to spend much of his time pinning for the Fjords.

As for myself, Lintilla and I, while not working out how to introduce modern plumping to the Valley, have been on a long term mission from Mr.Bean The dwarfs leader.
He and Darkevilme seem at odds. One wishes to see modern city for citizens and trade, the other is pushing for an immense fortress of purely military intent. Lintilla and I have been at work to help the former along"

Down in the Crucible of Armok Mr.Bean walked in on Lintilla hard at work.
"How much done Missy?"
"Almost all of it Mr.Bean. Few of the Dwarfs come here so most have not noticed how much has been processed" The Clone said with a smile as she closed the door to a glowing Magma Forge. Mr.Bean looked down into the store room.
"By Armok, ye HAVE been busy.


TallLabored Valley, outer fortress walls some time later
The sound of pickax's and hammers could be heard throughout the Valley. Darkevilme, the self appointed military leader of TallLabored looked over the rising fortifications with a satisfied expression.
"Alright ye bloody pansies! get to work on those alls double time! Orc's aint going to be kept out by just heaps of rocks!" The dwarf yelled as she felt a slight tap on her soldier. Turning around quickly she spied Mr.Bean some of the Starpeople and a Wagon covered by a Tarp awning.

"Oy, What ye be after Bean? I'm busy making sure we aren't ransacked by bloodthirsty orcs." Mr.Bean nodded.
"Aye dat be true, but we be needing more then dat Darkev. The plans of this city have a bit more then just walls ye know" Darkevilme winced, she thought she had hid all of the 'Official' plans form the Low King
"The Low King wanted a real city! Dar be plans her for roads wells, a city for more then just the military!"

Darkevilme snorted as the Dwarf swept some dirt form her elegant chain mail skirt.
"Don't ye be daft Mr.Bean, every stone be needed for this Valleys defense! We fended off goblins but Orcs going to require far greater work! Ye can't go about taking stone for fancying up ye plans when it be needed elsewhere!" The Dwarf said turning back to the work crew. Mr.Bean seemed undaunted.

"Dat be true Darkev, dat be very true. We DO need all the stone for fortifications. Which is why, My plans for the city will not be using Stone." There was a slight cough as some of the workers dropped their equipment. Darkevilme turned
"Not use stone?

"Dat be right, we be using copper. Lots and lots of Copper" he said, placing a heavy ingot into Darkevilmes hand as behind him Lintilla, Trillian and Lintillas pulled the tarp off of a wagon full of copper.
"Enough for all of my proposals, all I be needing is some workers" Mr.Bean said before walking away. Behind him Rawtooth, Karza and Exonerate the best workers in the Valley looekd at each other. Thee chance to work for anyone other then the Tyrannical orders of Darkevilme was a question they did not spend much time pondering.

It was not long before Mr.Beansaw his plans put into Action. Over the next few days a flurry of COnstruction began that would leave the valley gleaming of Copper.

Construction of a new vast copper road began for trade wagons and goods.


A proper well for those other then the Dwarfs was started.

And, largely to the bemusement and consternation of many of the Dwarfs, a "Garden" was begun under the careful eye of Trillian and the Lintillas'

It was a few days later, as Darkevilme watched the newest caravan come up the now gleaming copper road, that Mr.Bean, still using crutches, sat down next to the warrior.

"Sorry to take de wind form ye sails there Darkev, but much to ye credit, a City can't just be walls and fortifications the Low King ordered us ta make a City for Everyone Darkev, and just look below. Dwarfs, Beastmen, Humans Starpeople, even bleeding elves. ((the two shared a joined shiver)) It be quite a sight!" Darkevilme nodded, yet sight.

"Thar still be something missing from it all mate"
"Dat be it!" The Dwarf cried as she dashed out into the field.
================================================
Next Epasode!!!
The Second Attack of PaleLabored!
Madness Strikes once more!
and
Marvin throws Hella Far!!!

[CaptainChewbacca]

God help me, but a dwarven settlment built entirely out of copper is one of the greatest things I've ever comprehended.

[Crossroads Inc.]

God help me, but a dwarven settlment built entirely out of copper is one of the greatest things I've ever comprehended.

Just mostly civic improvments. Darkevilme has been hoarding the stone with an Iron (copper) fist because she is bent on turning TallLabored into a military Fortress. Mr.Bean however has been far more bent on making the valley into a more "open" city, so he got around her by using Copper for all the improvments he wanted to do.

Keep in mind we have well over 200 copper bars left even after this. Depending on when the Fortress Walls finish, they could easily be totally lined with meancing spikes of Copper.

EDIT: Did you ever want to be in this Chewy? I don't think I named a Dwarf after you.

[White Haven]

Ammunitiondwarf White Haven reporting for firing, sah!

[The Yosemite Bear]

I thought we were supposed to either pave everything with either gold, or Iron?

[Crossroads Inc.]

I thought we were supposed to either pave everything with either gold, or Iron?

Gold is in shot supply and Iron looks drab and gray, copper is more shinny since we don't have Gold.
Also I DID get a War Bear from some Elves Yosemite, and currently you are guarding the gate chained to a +Iron+ chain. there is a pic of you by the Well under construction.

[CaptainChewbacca]

Any miner/engineer/builer or teacher would be great, Crossroads.

[Crossroads Inc.]

Any miner/engineer/builer or teacher would be great, Crossroads.

I can give you an open Siege engineer roll. Fitting as we (that is to say Darkevilme's army) finished its first siege crossbow.

[CaptainChewbacca]

Any miner/engineer/builer or teacher would be great, Crossroads.

I can give you an open Siege engineer roll. Fitting as we (that is to say Darkevilme's army) finished its first siege crossbow.

Excellent. Perhaps a dwarf who's solution to all problems is 'Well... I guess I could shoot it with my giant fucking crossbow.'

[White Haven]

Possibly firing an Ammunitiondwarf-tipped bolt?

[Crossroads Inc.]

Ladies and Gentlemen... TALL-LABORED!


A Main gatehouse (Upper wall being enlarged for Siege Weapons)
B Clothing workshops (leather working, cloth processing, Dye shops, Looms)
C Food workshops (Stills, Butchers, Kitchens, Millstones)
D Future Living Quarters for 'Starpeople'
E Stone workshops (Mason shops, crafts-shops, engineering shops)
F Wood workshops (Carpentry shops, more crafts shops, Bowyer)
G Storerooms
H Current Living Quarters for 'Starpeople'
I Offices of Mr.Bean and Trillian
J Entrance to (eventual) underground city.
K Main Hall

A few notes, most of the workshops are connected by tunnels so the (Real) Dwarfs need not go out into the sun to go to and from work. Also as an idea of where this is all going, here is a layout of the walls under construction around the valley. Also, ALL those roads, all copper. VERY shinny.

[CaptainChewbacca]

Its... magnificent!

Two questions:

1. Are the store rooms (G) and living quarters (H) dug out of the ground?
2. What's the structure directly south of F?

[Crossroads Inc.]

Its... magnificent!

Two questions:

1. Are the store rooms (G) and living quarters (H) dug out of the ground?
2. What's the structure directly south of F?

1: Yes, those were dug out by Trillian, Ford and Arthur soon after the crash of the "Heart of Gold" when they didn't have any shelter. Since there was a valley, digging into the dirt walls was an easy way to get quick space for things.

2: I forgot about that... Its the "stables" where all the walking meat is kept.

[ShadowDragon8685]

As another question, have you considered laying out the fortress so that dwarves have to go into the sunlight to eat and drink? Cave adaptation, the syndrome, brings no positive benefits, only negative ones. The tag's benefits to working underground apply whether or not one is actually cave adapted.

Personally, I like to move everything underground anyway, but I engineer an outside sculpture garden with channels dug into the ground that's the only way to get into the Legendary dining rooms and the food storage areas; build a 'chimney' of walls a few stories tall around this area on the surface so goblin archers can't come up to the top and pelt your dorves with arrows and scare them away.

Prevents cave adaptation with a zilch failure rate, and even in an area highly prone to rain or snowstorms it won't give them that much of a negative thought to get caught "outside" in inclement weather.

In your case, it would be as simple as keeping the food warehouse and dining hall in one of those buildings in the middle and keeping the living quarters and workshops un-connected by tunnels so that the dwarves have no option but to walk through an open space to get to them. For extra fun, build it entirely out of wood so it looks like Theodan's throne room, call it a throne room, and have an irate dwarf exclaim "That's not a throne room, it's a lodge!"

[Crossroads Inc.]

That may be happening on it's own despite the tunnles. A lot of the Dwarfs move around above ground just because it is shorter. And for whatever reason they seems to gravitate to the outside well instead of the one in the cave.

In other news
****************************************

((cue music“Journey of the Sorcerer”))



It had started innocently enough... "Vortrex" and '"Joviwamwas above the valley gathering provisions from some of the bushes still growing before the next winter. The Cook and his friend often went out together, one to forage food stuffs, the other to practice his wrestling on any local wildlife. They Should have been safe enough they reasoned, they were within the walls after all. But the hunting Dwarf had noticed something "Odd" about the bushes... He Swore one of them was looking back at him!
"Grrggle Fgzgh Grllo slrrggurll!" The green goblins shouted as they leapt from their hiding places and set upon the hapless cook!
AN AMBUSH! CURSE THEM! Vortex shouted as the goblins charged as "Joviwam" raised his Crossbow to desperately fend off the onrushing goblins..


A swift crack to the Dwarf rendered Voretex nearly unconscious. But down bellow him, his words rang out through the valley, in no time Darkevilme had gathered her squad together and was racing to the goblins as Votex dazed but alive fought back wildly against a circle of goblins.
"Ye bleeding green skinned buggers! Ye won't take me dat easily!" He shouted as he grappled with the goblin closest to him in a life or death struggle.


"Darkevilme" and "CivilWarMan" arrived first as "Joviwam" fought back at close quarters, bringing his crossbow down onto a goblins helmet with a satisfy "CRACK" sound that left the goblin still.
"AHOY Der Joviwan! Don't ye be having all da fun!" Darkevilme shouted as her and "CivilWarMan" unleashed a superdwavenly hail of Crossbow bolts upon the now stunned green ambushers.
Meanwhile Vortex was loosing ground as he fought of the goblins three to one. He had done well to fend them off when an Ax-Goblin came too close and brought his weapon down hard. There was a wet sound and the Dwarf clutched his side as blood poured out!
"A-Armok! I am coming to jo-join you!" The Cook rattled weakly before passing out.


"VORTEX!" Darkevilme shouted as she dashed to close the distance between her and the goblins. Fireing off another quick set of bolts, the remaining goblins were all but dispatched as "CivilWarMan" joined with "Joviwam" who was trying to keep the guts of "Vortex" from spilling out.
"He is a goner, It be only a matter of time" he said gravely. Behind them, Trillian, Lintilla and Arthur dashed to the scene. Below in the Valley, everyone was making ready and getting to the still unfinished town walls. Crossbows Ax'es and Hammers were raised, awaiting any further assault.

Trillan arrived with a box and quickly opened it up.
"It isn't as bad as it looks, he will live" she said as the others watched on in fascination.
"It be magic for certain" said Darkevilme with a hint of bitterness to her voice. Trillian sighed as she began to apply some of her last medical supplies to the wounded Dwarf.
"Surely you people HAVE medicine" she said as Arthur watched with a sense of stomach churning fascination.

[ShadowDragon8685]

That may be happening on it's own despite the tunnles. A lot of the Dwarfs move around above ground just because it is shorter. And for whatever reason they seems to gravitate to the outside well instead of the one in the cave.

If you really want to make your dorves cave adapted, you could always set the tunnels as high-traffic areas and the outside as low traffic...

Me, I like to make the anti-adaptation into an architectural feature, but yours seems to be progressing ad-hoc.

I ought to warn you now, however, depending on what version you're playing: I have seen a semimegabeast knock down a constructed Wall in the version included in the latest Lazy Noob pack, and it was not a pansy wooden wall, either, but one made of Bauxite blocks. Beware! Build thine fortifications strong and thick.

[The Vortex Empire]

Dammit, I knew this would happen!

[ShadowDragon8685]

Dammit, I knew this would happen!

Er... What would happen?

[CaptainChewbacca]

Dammit, I knew this would happen!

Er... What would happen?

Read the story post. Vortex nearly got killed.

[ShadowDragon8685]

Aaaah, right, I see.

Um... Are condolences in order if his dwarf snuffs it? Perhaps you'd better have a mason crank out a casket and dig a fully-engraved tomb somewhere for him, quick-like?

[Crossroads Inc.]

((cue music“Journey of the Sorcerer”))

A sadden hush fell upon TallLabored in the wake of the ambush, not out of any sense of worry about the near fatal wounds inflected upon the humble cook Vortex, after all Dwarfs were used to a harsh and brutal life. Much of their existence was marked with endless clashes against everything from Giant Titans to fish that had been known to drag a Dwarf down to his doom.

No the real reason for the saddened, almost ashamed hush over the fortress was the tongue lashing the head Dwarfs were getting from Trillian.

”MEDICINE! It isn’t hard to grab cloth and wrap it around a wound to stop the bleeding!” She said as she and Lintilla carried Vortex to his room while Lintilla followed with fresh water and linens.
“I would ask what sort of primitive society this is, but I think I already know the answer! And after all this time, all the building and all of the improvements and all of the, the Civilization I have seen you people build up here, that somehow putting a split on a broken bone or cleaning an infected wound somehow escapes you!” She bellowed before storming off.

There was some mutterings by the Dwarfs, some nervous shuffling of feet before Zaphod broke the tension.

“Hey cats buck up! I’ve got far worse from her in my day, you lot got off easy!” He said and handed Mr.Bean and ShadowDragon a very stiff drink.
“Now lets change this rather unfroopy, you guys are as tough as ol’ Monkey man where it comes to not getting killed” Zaphod said as Arthur, trying to get some bones from his bath robes protested.

“I protest Zaphod! Do you realize that in my time with you just how often I have been chased, yelled at, shot at, blow up and disintegrated? Arthur snapped.
“Exactly my point Monkey boy, you’ve been almost killed dozens of times, but you’ve never actually died!” Zaphod said as he slapped Arthur firmly.

Elsewhere outside the Valley, just, outside the Valley front gates in fact, a very nervous Slacker was carrying his latest haul of fish from the river that ran outside the valley walls. Looking at the bushes on either side of him, swearing that goblins could be anywhere, he mutters to himself.

“Bleeding miners! They have time to tunnel all over this valley but they can’t be arsed to make a simple tunnel to the one source of fish around here! They want fresh turtle? Well they can bloody well come outside the walls and get it themselves!” Slacker said irritated as he hurried back. He could see the main gates now and breathed a sigh of relief, almost back home and out of---

THIEF! PROTECT THE HORDE FROM THE SKULKING FILTH!!!


“Armoks Blood!” Slacker shouted as he leapt back from the lizard like Kolbol that he swore simply materialized out of thin air. Dropping his haul of fish he dashed toward the gates as the gibbering thing made off with his catch.

“Bloody Kolbols!” he shouted angrily shacking his fist as behind him CivilWarMan and Loomer sniggered.
“Don’t laugh you two! Those bloody thieves are everywhere I tell you, everywhere!”

“Steady on there!” Slacker none of them skulking lizards dare show up inside the gates. Nothing will get past us here” Loomer boasted as, if on cue, an iron +War Hammer+ lifted up into the air as if by magic.
THIEF! PROTECT THE HORDE FROM THE SKULKING FILTH!!!

The Kolbol faded into existence before them as it tore through the front gates, dashing between the spikes and traps that one would assume keep virtually anything from getting in or out.

At this point, several other Dwarfs had converged on the area as it became apparent that the recent fish theft was not an isolated incident. DarkEvilMe dashed up, Hammer and Sword in hand as behind here Stofsk and [/i]Joviwam[/i] followed, weapons at the ready.

Ford Prefect watched the happenings with some amusement.
“They are just little lizard things, I don’t really see what all the fuss is about. I would hardly say this warrants sending the army out” Ford said down to Mr.Bean, though the sarcasm was lost on the burly Dwarf.

“This be about Pride Starman! We face down monsters, dragons, Orcs, carp! We won’t be made fools of by some small skulking cowards!” He sais with much theatrical flare as in font of the main gates about a half dozen Dwarfs, all heavily armed, stood and watched, daring something to happen.

THIEF! PROTECT THE HORDE FROM THE SKULKING FILTH!!!


“It’s after the Olive Oil again! The last jar of olive in the whole universe!!!” Came a cry form behind the assembled as a small gray creature came dashing out from the simple firt dwelling of Ford and Arthur. Arthur for his [art was hot on the heels of the thief. He had chased down one of these creatures before and it had ended badly, for the Kolbol. This poor example of the race was no less fortunate as it ran full tilt into the awaiting Dwarfish forces. The end results were not pretty.

Blood, gore and severed limbs flew from the location where the Kobol had once stood, The battered can of Greek olive oil falling to the ground where it was quickly picked up by Arthur.

“Eeyarg, you people don’t mess about do you” he said as he wiped the treasured can free of entrails and Kolbol remains. The assembled Dwarfs, the notorious foe now properly vanquished, beamed furiously and exchanged much backslapping. A plodding sound broke their shared jubilation as Marvin the Android slumped pass, *Ax* in metallic hand.

“I don’t see what all the fuss is about, it isn’t exactly hard to bludgeon someone with primitively forged metal and blunt instruments. It isn’t like you had your brain linked to a hyper planetary war computer, having to commutate the strategies of millions of horribly beweoponed starships. I’m sure you couldn’t begin to comprehend the situation so I don’t even know what I bother to ask you, oh god I’m so depressed.” He finished before trudging out of the main gates,

Mr.Bean looked to Loomer who looked back to Mr.Bean
“That Golem is going to snap one of these days, mark my words”

=======================================
Next Episode!!! Marvin Snaps!
((Note, the one pic is not altered in any way, in the space of one day, I did indeed have Three thief's pop up around the fort. I wish I had a screenshot of just what happened to the third Kolbol, he popped up virtually right next to the Dwarfs practicing at the front gate, limbs and gore flew everywhere. ))

[ShadowDragon8685]

Wow, did I get inducted? Do I have a dwarf now?

[Crossroads Inc.]

I assigned you as one of the new goblin fodder, eh, I mean soldiers in the army.
There are actually quite a few unfilled positions.

[Slacker]

Oh crap, I have to fish?! The carp are going to feast on my entrails.