Ahh yes, HoMM... Stark may even like MORE things than me recently, and I mean that in jest, as I've honestly got it in for fanboys of any stripe--but this game in particular STILL evades me. I think it's fun, but I think checkers can be fun, and checkers
fucking sucks. I've often been told that I hate everything, and I honestly think I'm closer to that label than the man above me is, especially where beloved gems of someone's childhood is concerned. This game has some
issues.
Now I know people on this board played these games. Five years ago fucking every son of a bitch did (except me, but hey). So I'm interested in fannish discussions surrounding a) evolution of mechanics (the HoMM fanbase is apparently almost as bad as Fallout in this regard) b) the silly plot I know nothing about and c) why the hell there's a game on the shelves basically identical to a 90s Mega Drive game. Some Russians are even making an EVEN CLOSER TO KINGS BOUNTY game called 'Kings Bounty: Legend' or something!
C and B, I have no idea. There's plot? Really? Honestly... is that necessary? C'mon. One of these days I'm just waiting for the game-maker to say "Plot is irrelevant, smash monsters together you rabid fuckers" and be done with it. Kinda like the 'story' in Dawn of War. "In the Future there is Only War. GET TO IT!"
As for A... I'm a backseat developer well on my way to becoming a frontseat developer, and boy, does this game have
room for improvement.
1) Stacks: You have to be
fucking kidding me. Stacks weren't even cute when they first came out, and they're ultra special ultra not cute now that we have Supreme Commander out there busting a nut across the screen with 500 million units at once. Supreme Commander has all the personality as the aforementioned checkers game (though with deeper strategy), but I think the idea of flying/divebombing griffons attacking hordes of demons while a deathmarch of skeletons grinds it's way across the fields--pulling the dead with them in their wake--is a pretty easy thing to grasp. Think of what would happen if we translated these armies into a M:TW type of graphics engine, and then made it turn based? Wouldn't that be better?
Why don't they just give it up? Stacks are moronic, and the epitome of NO GODDAMN STRATEGY. Get rid of stacks. Make actual units. It's not so hard to group them up and send them around that way. Just let me assign them a 'grouping type' from a dropdown. 3 options:
Horde (all of them in one mass),
Squad (divided into groups of 12 or so, what's a real squad size?) or
Support (works independantly, like catapults or giant beasties). Bonus points if these also automatically assign AI based on that unit type.
Extra double bonus points if you allow for an extremely basic 'squadbuilder' option to let me mix-and-match units on the fly into custom mixed squads. The turns are fucking long enough as-is.
2) Crudugly Isometric Map: The time for this has passed as well. There's no need for a complete 3D map, I'm okay with an abstracted 'battle map' of sorts, that's in-keeping with the game. But just like how the characters have moved to 3D, let's move the maps to 3D, and not from the side, and not so fucking stupid. A little more room for combat, if you'd please, the same way we're switching from a stack of skeles to actually showing 300 skeletons running across a blasted wasteland, kicking up clouds of dirt as they charge forwards into enemy crossbow fire.
3) Growth: There's so many ways that this is broken that it's not even funny. Growth, in all it's forms, is such a horrific idea that I can't believe they didn't can it sometime prior to the first game being made, ever. In one sense, it makes sense, right?
Fucking no it doesn't. The obvious issue with this is that not only does it make it extremely difficult to catch up, but it also bludgeons most types of strategy into the mud with sheer numerical obstinance. And don't get me started on the damnable undead and their skeleton hoarding (as in, collecting to the point of absurdity, not as in making a horde, which they also do). Please, let's replace this system with something less retarded.
Know what might be fun? I could sink gold and gems and shit into something I want, like a legion of dragons. Okay, spent. But I don't get them for thus-and-so turns. I'm not terribly enamored with the idea of basebuilding, so I'm not in favor of building extra recruitment structures just so you can have a 'dragons only' army, but please, instead of buying them that turn, let me buy them now and appear in subsequent turns, and let the rating be a maximum output per day, perhaps. Nothing is more aggrivating than battling your way to the enemy's fort only to have him buy an entire legion of beasties to oppose you when you get there. Usually not a serious issue, but it's just one more frustration with the system already.
4) Heroes: The hero system is completely broken. It favors very specific heroes, and makes a wide variety of them totally worthless. If heroes are reduced to nothing but a barrel of static 'special effects' like 'goblins throw flaming shit rather than normal shit, for +1 damage' then please let me have more than one. Grimgoblin McPyrodung is not worth not taking The Ravenator, who gives me like 2 free fire attacks per turn, or something. Making magic so essential is alright, I guess... it'd certainly look more interesting if I actually got to see the result, but it really favors some heroes over others. If the system wasn't so random, this wouldn't be an issue, but randomness is anathema to these kinds of strategy games. It's not like I can really use the terrain to my advantage or some kind of WWII brilliance to defeat my enemy. It's basically throwing stacks of numbers at each other until one side dies. It's really barely any more complicated than Civ's combat--which has never been the platinum standard of genius combat modelling.
5) Army Types: They've been working on this, but it's still flat. Armies are all basically the same sorts of things, and it's a big issue. Since I can't place my archers behind infantry or something tactical like you can in most wargames, there's nothing stopping someone from just massacring units that they don't like and there's hardly a damn thing I can do about it. If I'm lucky there might be a rock or something to hide behind, thus making my stack absolutely useless...
...anyway, more importantly, there are very few armies that 'play' significantly differently from each other. Their Top-Tier units, also, are also pretty similar, generally. And certain ones are going to be real badasses while others... aren't. I'm fine with asymmetric warfare, I think it's sweet. But asymmetric doesn't mean "one side has a good special unit while the other one is identical
except it sucks." I've actually had people tell me it's an advantage, because now I don't need to spend money on them, as if not having unstoppable badasses in my army was beneficial from a budgetary point of view. If the Elf Army is good at range, and my army of sentient river silt beasts is not, that's fine--but please, let's diversify the playstyle some. Otherwise certain armies are really going to beat the fuck out of you, since you can't just specialize your forces due to Growth. If the only things I have that can stand up to the Enemy Army are my ranged units, I can't just build more ranged units to balance him out.
6) City Control: The city control mechanic is bullshit, flat out. I understand you want me to keep armies at my base, I get it. But since controlling more territory is generally not even going to entitle me to much of a stronger military (until I take someone's fortress), it becomes really tiresome. And chasing down an enemy horse as it meanders around my territory is the most frustrating thing I've ever seen. If the goal is to reward someone whose hero magically allows them to drag a giant behemoth's ass cross country in a matter of minutes, then huzzah! Mission Accomplished! However, if it's supposed to be some kind of strategic maneuvering system, it sucks ass. The Total War games had pretty asstacular main map movement, but they were way better than this. Armies don't just stomp around like lunatics, and it becomes really problematic when I'm trying to stop someone rampaging around, and they can clear out and collect a million things easily, due to combat not costing much movement (if any).
Worse is that you can just gank someone's city. No siege, no nothin'! Well, at least, not often. This is a big issue when someone decides to pull the "Mother Of All Armies" trick, dump all their forces into one area, and just send him at you. Do you queen-swap? Do you ride out to fight him? What to do? It's generally a game of chicken at that point, but the Growth system can make things frustrating--moreso than is useful. It's not like I can draft recruits from my loyal citizens to help me retake my city. Since my city is the only place I can make troops, as well as the only territory that really allows me to do
anything of merit or set up a static defense, if someone makes a concerted attack on it, they can quite often grab it. You can, of course, retake it. But the loss in military dudes--as well as the stupid Growth cycle--can really kill you. There's no reason for it to be such a black-and-white thing. There should be more battles conducted in the field. OH WAIT!
7) NO FUCKING RETREAT: No wonder I never engage someone in the field unless I have an army of 500 Cockgoblins and Satan's Wang itself on my side, if I retreat, everything dies. It should be called "commit seppuku" because that's basically what it is. This makes battling for territory impossibler (since it was already idiotic to bother) and it makes anything but complete, 100 percent violent death a rare occasion. Not even the Adeptus Astartes know such unflinching discipline. If a routed army scattered, but could be reformed, that'd be one thing. But the fact that my hero DIES, essentially, or at the very least deserts my cause... is really pathetic.
So basically the growth system means that if you ever get behind on troops of equal quality, you may be fucked in a battle. Since the way the game is designed favors massive stacks of units on one army, you want as many forces in one place as possible. Your units can't even move by themselves, for fuck's sake, so it's nearly impossible to reinforce an army. And because apparently this game was made on
Kronos by
Klingons, retreat is not an option, so if any small army gets caught by the enemy's massive ultrastack army, it's basically going to be a complete and utter annihilation. This discourages much creative play, because what's the point? Buy a bunch of cheapass heroes to go Solo and grab resource points and shit that the enemy grabs, and have your giant Doomfleet crush any opposition you run into. Best case, beat h is army, and then send whatever is left to his base before the end of the week. If you can steal his Growth phase, it's gonna be game over.