Screw you Assassins Creed!

[Mr Bean]

It's Vent time, but since it's game specific and I'm asking for help it goes here rather than the vent thread.

Alright, there's a game called Assassins Creed might have heard of it, I picked it up off of Steam after the price hit 29.99$(Aside from Trip-A titles I only buy games once they hit 30$ nowadays)

So I have the game I'm digging the Free-running elements, I'm stumbling through combat and because of timing issues I can't pull of any "combo" I give up on it and play this game like I play a Thief game, IE Hide then stabby stabby then run away and hide again. I reach the point prating on Archers and guards at which point I could kill an entire group of soldiers(Say one near a "save the citizen" check-point") with just throwing knives and a leaping stab, no need to touch my sword at all.

As for Assassinations themselves I planned them out to a T and managed to assassinate all eight inital targets without having to engage in one sword-fight. Five of which I managed to pull off without anyone noticing me until the man died, they never even got their blades out to defend themselves. The best of course was the book-burner, I ID him, hit him with a knife to get him to run then follow him along the roof-tops before find a nice stop to leap down and stab him in the throat.


Which is why it took me about eight tries to beat the Slaver target because you can' sneak up on him, instead you must fight off the guards. Whatever if it happens once it happens.

Now here we are last assassination and what's this? Fuck another ambush and it's twelve on one plus two frigging archers trying to kill me, F U game. Fine whatever I'll run away and kill them one by one as they turn corners and I put them down with throwing daggars. The target I simply threw off a building to avoid having to fight her.


So here we are final battle, and it's nothing but combat, combat and more combat, what the fuck? When did this become Rambo Part VII? Trial and error and three hours of work gets me past all five main encounters and I hit the final target and...

A fight to death! Ok fine, hard but manageable but wait?
What the fucking? Ten on one???! Ten on fucking ONE? And I have to jump right into the final target battle(Who like target nine I can't stab but MUST fight) so I restart and... I have to fight all ten knights again fuk....

So big nasty puts me down in two hits since I just got done(After five attempts to beat all ten Knights) I quit in disgust for the night and try again today except.... except despite thirty minutes of fighting, there are no save points anywhere, that's right the game starts me over at the start and forces me to fight all four preliminary fight and the second to last fight and the final fight, I mean come the fuck on...

Are there any PC cheats for Assassins creed? Cause that stupid, I can play the goddamn game as an Assassin all the way till the end? Then I got to trade my stabbing knife in for some Action Hero boots and sword? Come on now!

[Stark]

Oh yeah, for all it's 'lol ninja' crap, the endgame is just an absolutley huge swordfight. It was hard for me, and I had mastered the counter-attack thing, so without that I can't imagine how you're going to get past it.

[Ford Prefect]

Oh yeah, for all it's 'lol ninja' crap,

Despite how hideously visible you and all your major kills are, I found that it never got old to throw a guard of a roof to the extreme consternation of everyone in the area.

It was hard for me, and I had mastered the counter-attack thing, so without that I can't imagine how you're going to get past it.

I was variously amazing with the counter-attack, being able to waltz into a fight with a billion dudes in Jerusalem and only using the hidden dagger, or otherwise so terrible with it that the AI would string together a massive combo attack gangbang that would leave me near dead every time.

That short blade of his is like Christian genocide given form. Not even I could fail when using that against a large group.

[Stark]

The final fight is nuts though - you've got to use heaps of pushes to thin them out, THEN do a counter-kill on one of them. Otherwise you get hacked to ribbons while you're trying to kill someone. It was quite frustrating, and I wanted to know why I couldn't just throw a knife at Captain Evil and kill him without killing his whole goddamn army.

[Ford Prefect]

It was quite frustrating, and I wanted to know why I couldn't just throw a knife at Captain Evil and kill him without killing his whole goddamn army.

You had knives left then?

[Stark]

I never used the damn things, I sucked at aiming. I think I used a few in the approach to the army (what with the archers above etc), but I had heaps left. In the fight against Captian Evil, I actually used about half a dozen to break his combos. IF ONLY HE DIDN'T HAVE A FORCEFIELD BEFORE.

[CaptHawkeye]

It was quite frustrating, and I wanted to know why I couldn't just throw a knife at Captain Evil and kill him without killing his whole goddamn army.

If the game had allowed me to do that I would have completely forgiven it for it's quirkier game play moments."Captain French wants you to duel him and his whole army. Altair just shrugs and chucks a knife at his face." Harrison Ford would be proud.

[Tasoth]

I didn't play the PC one, but when I did beat AC, it was through spamming the counter attack. Once you work it out, you can move through a horde of swordsmen like a thresher through grain. The final bout took me only a couple tries on account that they'd pin me in the corner and throw off my timing.

[Balrog]

You gotta have damn good timing, combined with liberal use of counter-attacks and throwing guys away to give you some breathing space, to get through the knights. It's a bitch to play through, but eventually you'll get it.

[Joviwan]

I don't really understand the "not being able to time" thing. Once I sat down for ten minutes working it out, I often and very frequently ran around the world map assaulting every horde of soldiers that I could. I had gotten the unlocks for however many kills with the sword and knife before I finished the fourth assassination mission.

Sad to say, I wasn't as good at the stealthy assassin thing. About half of my targets went down the stealthy way. The other half I bollocksed up along the road.

The one that frustrated me most was the executioner. It really felt like I could assassinate him quietly, yet I could never figure out how. Was there a way? I know that I never waited for too terribly long.

[weemadando]

I quite liked a lot of the gameplay innovations (ease of movement, simplified - but not simple combat etc), but damnit - the game as a whole wasn't that good.

Especially if you just want to drop in and do some GTA style fucking about. It takes about 10 minutes to get there - especially once you have finished the game, because you have to watch the closing cutscene EVERY FUCKING TIME you load the game again.

[DesertFly]

Man, I sucked at the stealth in AC. In Thief: TDP, I was a master of sneaking. Give me a sliver of shadow and I could hide from God Himself. But in AC I was more like a spinning whirlwind of death with my throwing knives and dagger. I mean, I could get in fights with groups of guys so big that no matter how much health I started with I would have regenerated it all by the end, and I never got hit, and I got to see every single of the knife's (and sword's) counter-kill animations. But I couldn't get a single stealth assassination after the first one. The end fights were complete cakewalks, compared to those stupid side missions to stealth assassinate archers.

[Vendetta]

By the end of Assassin's Creed I was decimating guards and templars left and right. I was starting fights with the biggest guard mobs I could to break up the monotony of wandering around, especially when I was on flag hunts.

[weemadando]

By the end of Assassin's Creed I was decimating guards and templars left and right. I was starting fights with the biggest guard mobs I could to break up the monotony of wandering around, especially when I was on flag hunts.

If you couldn't get a conga line of at least 30 happening, you weren't trying hard enough.

The best thing was to lead them into a really hazardous area like the docks and watch them try to follow you over the really difficult areas and have a few fall and drown.

[Vendetta]

The best thing was to lead them into a really hazardous area like the docks and watch them try to follow you over the really difficult areas and have a few fall and drown.

No, the best thing was to start a big fight in the camp outside Acre, hop up on one of the archer towers, and see how long you could be king of the castle using only the throw move to send them sailing off the edge to their doom.

[Stark]

The cheese of throw became the only entertainment the game provided after a few hours. Once mercilessly murdering everyone with the punch-knife got old, shoving hordes of guards off rooftops was where it was at. Even the 'good' guards were so laughably easy to counter (and so passive as to hang back for ages) that no matter how many guys were 'fighting' you, you were really only fighting 3-4.

[Lord Pounder]

I saw the PC version in Game last week. It looked good and I was about to get it but the guy I talk to behind the counter said that unless you play it with a 360 controller (which cost as much as the feckin game) it's neigh on unplayable.

[DesertFly]

I saw the PC version in Game last week. It looked good and I was about to get it but the guy I talk to behind the counter said that unless you play it with a 360 controller (which cost as much as the feckin game) it's neigh on unplayable.

I played it with my $20 Logitech controller, and that worked just fine. Mouse and keyboard control wasn't implemented well at all, though. And considering how short it is, I would wait until the game's $20 or less.

[Zixinus]

Personally, I'm more fustrated with the whole "modern time going back in time to relive trough genetic memory" thing. The story would have been fine just by itself, hell, it would be better. Otherwise, it was felt more like a conspiracy theory.

[Stark]

Personally, I'm more fustrated with the whole "modern time going back in time to relive trough genetic memory" thing. The story would have been fine just by itself, hell, it would be better. Otherwise, it was felt more like a conspiracy theory.

It WAS conspiracy theory mumbo-jumbo. It didn't really affect the game with it's lameness, though (except the need to listen to crazy folk talk about irrelevant nonsense) and leads into the sequel, so it was necessary in that some people demand games have stories, even absurd and silly ones.

[Peptuck]

The one that frustrated me most was the executioner. It really felt like I could assassinate him quietly, yet I could never figure out how. Was there a way? I know that I never waited for too terribly long.

I think the only way you can do it is to slip in with that little group of scholars on the left side of the stage, ride them up to the stage, and wait for Uddin to work his way down to your assassn buddy, then shank-shank.

Me, though, I just break off from the crowd, run around the left side, climb up the buildings, and leap down onto the stage, sword out, and slice Uddin to ribbons before he even draws his sword

Especially if you just want to drop in and do some GTA style fucking about. It takes about 10 minutes to get there - especially once you have finished the game, because you have to watch the closing cutscene EVERY FUCKING TIME you load the game again.

Go to Desmond's room, look at the wall, do the whole credits thing. Go back to the Animus, do whatever part of the game you want to do until you get an autosave. Wham, no more ending cutscene.

Still, why no one in Ubisoft came up with the idea to let YOU SKIP THE GODDAMN CUTSCENES is beyond me. I mean, shit, we've been skipping cutscenes for decades now in games, and these guys have their heads so far up their asses they forget that maybe, just maybe, some of us want to just dick around in the game instead of listen to Al-Mualim yammer on and on and then have to run all the waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay out of Masyaf before getting ot the good part.

[Zixinus]

It WAS conspiracy theory mumbo-jumbo. It didn't really affect the game with it's lameness, though (except the need to listen to crazy folk talk about irrelevant nonsense) and leads into the sequel, so it was necessary in that some people demand games have stories, even absurd and silly ones. Smile

The story writer actually wanted to write a novel off the thing. Supposedly, the REAL Assasins came and demanded the gobshite to stopped from publishing. Ubisoft yielded as it didn't want to attract that kind of attention. If that happens, then I think you just struck a great milestone of shittiness.

[Peptuck]

It WAS conspiracy theory mumbo-jumbo. It didn't really affect the game with it's lameness, though (except the need to listen to crazy folk talk about irrelevant nonsense) and leads into the sequel, so it was necessary in that some people demand games have stories, even absurd and silly ones. Smile

The story writer actually wanted to write a novel off the thing. Supposedly, the REAL Assasins came and demanded the gobshite to stopped from publishing. Ubisoft yielded as it didn't want to attract that kind of attention. If that happens, then I think you just struck a great milestone of shittiness.

Wait, there's Hashashin still around nowadays?

[Stark]

Wait, there's Hashashin still around nowadays?

You mean 'Ismailis' and yeah, they're all over the show. There are communities throughout the Middle East and a sizeable commuity in India. Of course, Assassin's Creed features the evil dudes sending hitsquads out to kill them all and even a hilariously poorly-planned attempt to storm a building in the middle of a major city.

[Ford Prefect]

a hilariously poorly-planned attempt to storm a building in the middle of a major city.

I don't think we can really talk about the planning that went on in regards to the rescue attempt. That said, the plan probably involved being highly visible at all times and pointedly ignoring anyone who notices.