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As always, Ford Prefect deserves our thanks. He is the best of all of us!


Idyllic Trade Port Fatman in orbit around Tastng

In any case, in the beginning there was Planet Tastng and it was riven by WAR and GREED and general BADNESSES. However, at approximately the same time as seven other nearby sentient races, the planet was united. Tastng was ruled by the Self-Determinance Novitiate - dedicated to harnessing the intrinsic potential of all to serve the Greater Good. Universal celebrations greeted the launch of the SDN Tokash, a Seize-and-Hold class vessel of enormous size, bringing benefit to society with it's combination of colony pods and giant space lasers. Early scouts had been sent out to discover the layout of the system, and the following data was quickly revealed.


The Known Universe

After securing the home sector, the Novitiate quickly engaged in Phase 1 Development; a lucrative ice world teeming with purple space crystals... but treacherously near the base for the dreaded space poirots! Phase 2, undertaken at extreme risk by a Captain Prefect-patent 'colonise and drive away' operation, secured Red Magmo, the only significant source of Space Rocks in the local area.


SDN Tokash defeats the pirates, Captain Prefect commanding

Many other groups had come into contact with the Novitiate, but none were more feared and hated than the Dreaded Empire of Mb'eeni, a race of unoriginal zergling-ripoffs who constantly menaced Ice Planet Fanta and the coreward frontier. On the outward marches lay Blue Swirly Station, sat squarely on the deceptive and unknowable wormhole (not black hole), where Admiral Dong's giant lasers and infinite supply of missiles would kill a great many blue and even purple spaceships, protecting both the wormhole's bizarre lighting effects and planet Magmo.


Admiral Dong saves Magmo, the wormhole, and our way of life

Early on in the expansion, the allure of the desert planet drew the Novitiate into conflict with the forces of Mb'eeni. It was necessary to secure the coreward flank and acquire the living-space required for the teeming, productive masses... but at what cost?

Next Week on Dumb Shit Stark Does and Takes Pictures Of - GIANT SPACE BATTLES and Jose B. Bear's damnation!


BANG

The Self-Determinance Novitiate needed to expand it's base of echelon-thinking producers, and the wide open spaces of the Desert Planet Jacobi lured them there. However, The Mb'eenies had bean and born there already, and conflict was inevitable.

The Novitiate had recently launched the battleship Glidestar to protect Prefect's aggressive acquisition strategy, and once the SDN Tokash had done with the pirates of Magmo, the fleet jumped as one to Jacobi in order to secure our freedoms.


First Battle of Jacobi - newly-promoted Commodore Prefect's fleet encounters early resistance above the dessicated paradise

Alarmingly, the Mb'eeni forces had already constructed a mobile battlestation of incredible size and power in the system, and it ponderously moved towards our fleet. It was not fully upgraded or armed, however, and Commodore Prefect faced it down with the remnants of his fleet.


Waves of trademarked SDN missiles deliver motivational therapy to the Mb'eeni relocation efforts

After a grueling battle and serious damage to the Glidestar, the battlestation was finally destroyed... but too late! The Mb'eenies had vectored relief forces, and Prefect was forced to pull out, as he couldn't do any more good in there. The fleet returned to Tastng to lick it's wounds and examine the benefits of the battle. Politically, battling the Mb'eeni empire was making friends across space, and many trade routes were negotiated, raises the average quality of life substantially and allowing Admiral Dong's starbase to be completed. The Joint Strike Fliegerschiff was finally completed - a massive fleet carrier, it used it's large hangers and stock market manipulation to assist the fleet. With replacements flowing in and the treasury full, Prefect was ordered to send his fleet back to Jacobi and capture it before the Zerg Mb'eeni could build another starbase.


View from the hangar of SDN Tokash at the fleet review, 546A2

Early reports from the battle were positive as no fleet had been placed in the system. As the escorts split up to create chaos among the orbiting structures, the heavier vessels rained nuclear fire on the surface of Jacobi, in order to prepare it for colonisation. Sadly, millions of Mb'eeni civilians died during the procedure.


Stage-1 colonisation protocol - an armchair Admiral's view

However, the Mb'eeni's had callously abandoned their people, sacrificing them to the colonial effort, in order to lure our brave fleet into a trap. When it was spread out, they attacked in unexpected numbers and with many carriers. Prefect's capital ships, cut off from their air-defence assets and pinned against the planet by the oncoming capital ships, found themselves in a dire situation. Glidestar's autocannon batteries were reported 'nearly melting' from constant engagement of dozens of targets in all directions, including a menacing enemy fleet carrier.


Initial attempts to break the encirclement were less than successful (Image from Second Battle of Jacobi)

However, due to doctrinal and moral superiority over our foes, the fleet blasted through the enemy, and raced for the jump zone to Ice Planet Fanta. However, Prefect knew his spread-out forces could never escape without a distraction, and so he bravely turned his damaged capital ships into the enemy as his smaller escorts escaped the area. This bold manouvre saved thousands of lives and caused such confusion among the enemy that they stopped launching fighters for some time - a true triumph of the Novitiate's philosophy! The enemy carrier was a primary target for the fleet, as it was home to thousands of fighters.


Textbook example of the 'focus fire' doctrine, demonstrated by Admiral Prefect during the struggle for Jacobi (Glidestar is shown once again disobeying fire discipline)

The carrier's fighters took a heavy toll on the fleet escorts, and all the anti-fighter assets had already been destroyed. For some time it was thought that the JSF would be lost in her first battle, but the doubters were silenced after a cataclysmic explosion tore the enemy carrier - and much of their fleet - to pieces.


For these Mb'eeni, the war is over

However, the Mb'eeni high command (HPCA or 'High Principate of Creative Aggression', a poor translation) had clearly planned this all along, as another pair of enemy capital ships arrived, decisively turning the battle against the SDN fleet, which was tired and heavily damaged after nearly three days of fighting. Many of the escorts ordered to retreat had returned to assist in the previous kill, and were now exposed to the new counter-counter-counterattack formulated by the enemy.


Turning point in the Second Jacobi Conflict

The battleships were in extreme danger. At one point, the SDN Tokash was targeted by a massive 'phase missile' attack from the entire enemy fleet and hit badly aft. It was at this point that Admiral Prefect realised retreat was necessary to prevent disaster. As his ships fought a running battle to the edge of the gravity well, he ordered his fleet to transmit a parting message to the Mb'eeni. He stood on the bridge of the JSF and declared

'I'll be back'

Unconfirmed reports suggest he next transmitted to the fleet his unorthodox order for individual ships to jump at will, rather than the regulation simultaneous jump in the following words

'Come with me if you want to live'

The words - and wisdom - of Admiral Prefect have, of course, stumped thinkers for decades since this battle, and no commentary can sensibly be offered here.

What game is this, and can I be a disposable minion dying for the glory of SDN?

As a first installment of Tim's Ships of the Greater Post-Planetside Era, Epoch ii, we present the SDN Tokash, the flagship of the Self-Determinance Novitiate space forces and where Admiral Prefect generally places his flag.


SDN Tokash, recognition features highlighted. Other Seize-and-Hold vessels differ as noted in PYC23.i

Primarily designed as a colonisation ship, it appears utilitarian and possesses a prominent greenhouse dome to feed the colonists during the at least several weeks they reside within. However, then-Captain Prefect exercised a strong influence on the design, demanding 'guns', forward-mountings for 'bigger guns' and also 'different guns on the left side'*. The installation of a powerful tactical sensor matrix allows the vessel to increase the accuracy and range of all ships nearby, and now-Admiral Prefect has upgraded his colonisation systems to immediately allow resource exploitation.

The ship is armed with variously distributed P3W-2 laser bombards which allow it to engage broadside with superiority over any smaller ship. The left side (or 'sinister' side, as Admiral Prefect generally describes it) also mounts a pair of 321.5mm D4KK4 autocannon, capable of spraying a large area with high-velocity projectiles and, additionally, creating a large amount of flash and vibration. It's shielding system is extremely powerful, but the vessel is only moderately armoured, in contrast to our next spotlighted vessel - the Invader battleship!


* in space, everyone docks from on top, so the term 'port' is disused

And yes Peptuck, I have just the place in mind for the likes of YOU! Do you like lesbians?

Symmetry is overrated! Also, carrying whole families of civilians into battle aboard their mightiest warship is the most noble of goals for any space nation.

And yes Peptuck, I have just the place in mind for the likes of YOU! Do you like lesbians?

Lesbians are the solution to everything, along with AK-47s.

However, knowing Stark, this is probably going to bite me in the ass

Fresh from the Institute for Battlestarship Spotting, this edition of Tim's Ships of the Greater Post-Planetside Era, Epoch ii covers the pride of the SDN fleet - the battleship Glidestar! Most heavily armed and toughest of all SDN vessels, this 'gun crazy' warhorse is often seen spraying the area with it's array of triple-barreled autocannon.



Designed my Mon Sunase, this vessel was nearly never completed due to serious percieved deficiencies in the design and weapon layout. The spinal laser occupies nearly a third of the forward hull, leaving space-intensive systems like weapon batteries and hangar spaces pushed to outriggers. The imbalance of firepower (with the left side possessing nearly double the broadside firepower and the heavy lasers on the hanger sponson only firing forward) tickled then-Commodore Prefect's taste for the 'sinister', however, and the vessel was completed as designed. It has since had a massive flak battery installed which assisted in the relief of carrier Joint Strike Fleigerschiff when cut off from escorting destroyers.

Below the main hull is mounted a personal project of the enigmatic weapon designer 'UR35'. This crudely titled 'giant fuck-off mass driver' is capable of destroying most smaller vessels in a single strike, and breaching a capital ship's armour to cause chaos within. The Glidestar has not yet refit this system to the now-standard 'absurdly giant, fuck-off mass driver' which would significantly increase the internal fires and spall damage inflicted by this most powerful of weapons.

By contrast, the spinal mounted beam array is seen by Admiral Prefect as a disappointment and he has floated ideas of removing it and building a little house in the free space for his dog to play in. It is extremely powerful, but can only sustain the beam for a short time and off-axis firing significantly decreases it's effective yield. It's description in the media as 'visually spectacular but effectively useless' is the only reason Prefect continues to employ it in his orchestrated plans of showmanship.

The ship has had an eventful life, and generally draws the most enemy fire in a melee. It's massive construction and powerful shields protect it, but often only the hardiness of the crew and experimental 'flux varience' systems in the shields protect it from far more serious damage or even destruction. The vessel possesses considerably more firepower than the older SDN Tokash, but Admiral Prefect never placed his flag here, only moving (temporarily) when the JSF was launched. Glidestar's captain has a repuation for impudence, and many accounts relate how he refuses to focus his many autocannons on one target, preferring to spread the fire around to (quote) 'fuck those guys the hell up'. In the Second Battle of Jacobi, the Glidestar's AA systems are considered responsible for the safe escape of the JSF carrier, and that's the ship we will next examine.

By popular demand, Tim's Ships of the Greater Post-Planetside Era, Epoch ii is now looking at the newest and most advanced ship in the Novitiate fleet - the SDN Curtis Sheppard.



After the many battles at Jacobi the SDN hierarchy determined a need for massive planetary preparation, much more than our existing warships could provide. A massive and complex system for delivering various fallout bombs, chemical and biological weapons was designed, and a dedicated bombardment ship or 'Dreadnought' build around it. The MK-class is a squat, aggressive and dangerous vessel that is nevertheless reliant on other ships in general naval combat.

Her primary armament is the rotary cannon mounted centrally - this weapon spits out whatever brand of planetary decimation is required, at a far higher rate, yield and sustainability than the non-dedicated weapons on other capital ships. This weapon is able to deliberately contaminate a planet to prevent it falling into enemy hands and fire a quick burst of incredibly powerful thermonuclear weapons, producing what Admiral Prefect regarded as 'quite a respectable display'. This display prompted him to install a luxuriously-appointed 'Fleet Viewing Gallery' on this particular ship, onto which the press and other dignitaries have been invited to watch the methods of our expansion. Foreign ambassadors, especially, are reported as being 'impressed' and once even 'shaken' by what they had witnessed.


The SDN Curtis Sheppard puts on a 'respectable display' with it's main cannon, much to the Mb'eenies' dismay

The other weapons the vessel possesses are all angled forwards, as befits it's aggressive role and commander. 24 missile launch tubes make this single warship the equivalent of an entire flotilla of smaller frigates, and their independently-targeting, off-axis attack capability does much to mitigate the vessel's otherwise poor arcs of fire. A 'six pack' of standard heavy P3W laser bombards is mounted on the right, and the primary cannon can also fire anti-ship warheads in a narrow arc.

Whilst solidly built, it is nowhere near as capable of absorbing damage as the Invader-class and is generally used by Admiral Prefect to disrupt his enemies' plans. As in the Third Battle of Jacobi, Prefect prefers arriving from an unexpected vector, pinning the enemy fleet and sending the bombardment force (centred on the Curtis Sheppard) to destroy the planet. This forces the enemy to be torn between two goals, and crushed between two forces. The vessel has only seen one battle so far, but extensive upgrade work has already taken place, such as the installation of new anti-shipping shells that actually 'burn' the enemy vessels for some time after each impact and nuclear re-entry vehicles of even higher yield and fallout potential. It is expected that as the war moves into a new phase - the destruction of the Mb'eeni empire -that the Curtis Sheppard will be at the very apex of the assault.

Ahh, Sins of a Solar Empire, the most tragic lack of a campaign ever judging by the opening cinematic. Did they ever fix the AI rushing bombard frigates and spamming those in fleets of 20 or 30?

Ah hell, sign me up to die in a loud, grotesque military manner.

Peptuck wrote:What game is this, and can I be a disposable minion dying for the glory of SDN?

Sins of a Solar Empire. Stark is playing the Entrenchment expansion and seeing if it fixed the glaring flaws of the origional (I can win with only capital ships!).

Nephtys wrote:Symmetry is overrated! Also, carrying whole families of civilians into battle aboard their mightiest warship is the most noble of goals for any space nation.

Actually it is required in this game. Why? Insane game mechanics.

Vehrec wrote:Ahh, Sins of a Solar Empire, the most tragic lack of a campaign ever judging by the opening cinematic. Did they ever fix the AI rushing bombard frigates and spamming those in fleets of 20 or 30?

Yes. They made them utterly useless. I don't know if they fixed it again- Stardock likes messing with the stats.

For those who don't know, Stark is playing the TEC. Last we saw them they had an insane advantage due to trading posts (that was probably edited) and were insane capitalists, so Stark isn't pulling this out of his ass. They really are that fucking crazy.

They also have 5 capital ship types and a maximum of 10 (unless they changed that)- the ones you haven't seen are the carrier and the caster- the Sova and the Dunov. Also, several of the traits he named are the upgrades you can do for the ships.

Here- all you wanted to know, but were afraid to ask:
http://sinsofasolarempire.wikia.com/wiki/Factions

Stark, what have they fixed in Entrenchment? Is it worth getting?

Also, sign me up- for carrier duty if possible.

I just remembered some things like damage types in that game drove me nuts. Like your 'heavy torpedo/beam/whatever' frigates your side got which seemed to be about hard-hitting ordinance did lots and lots of damage to enemy cruisers... yet, they're less effective vs battleships than your normal weak anti-frigate pew pews. Which makes no sense at all. So my giant nuke cannon wrecks cruisers, but harms Battleships less than a little bitty laser gun?

Also, LOL ADVENT FIGHTERS.

Ships! Large ones! I'll volunteer, even if it does mean that Stark shoves me in the front lines and I asplode.

The trading ports break the game horribly but the superweapons are more hilarious to me

The TEC get a nuke that travels through hyperspace, two of which will render any planet uninhabitable.
The psychic lesbians get a gun that shoots...ummm...culture.
And finally the super advanced nomadic aliens have a superweapon that blows up other superweapons.

Yes well obviously if I am in this game at all I must be either
a) captain of a Hoshiko (robotics) cruiser who refuses to repair other ships unless the admit the inherent inferiority of organic life first or
b) a crazed researcher at a remote outpost heading up the 'novalith project'. Versions 1, 2, 3, 8, 12 and 36 may all fail horribly and with embarassing side effects, but damnit, eventually it will be able to destroy planets.

So Entrenchment really has finally brought us Sins v1.0. What annoyed me about Sins was the tacked on single player component which the game screamed for. Obviously other things like shit balance and broken AI hurt it badly.

This was completely worth implying that Stark would be a 'big girly girl' if he didn't follow through on his threat to make a Let's Play.

Losonti Tokash wrote:The trading ports break the game horribly but the superweapons are more hilarious to me

The TEC get a nuke that travels through hyperspace, two of which will render any planet uninhabitable.
The psychic lesbians get a gun that shoots...ummm...culture.
And finally the super advanced nomadic aliens have a superweapon that blows up other superweapons.

And by culture you mean "KILL EVERYONE" rays.

JointStrikeFighter wrote:
And by culture you mean "KILL EVERYONE" rays.

Why what do you mean when you say 'culture'

Throughout all the later battles in Jacobi, mention must be made of the part played by Admiral Jose Bear from his lonely aeire aboard Storm Base. Begun during the buildup to the Second Battle of Jacobi, the base was fully completed at the time of the Third Battle of Jacobi and covered the retreat and resupply of Admiral Prefect's fleet after that engagement.


The fleet is prepared within the Gamma Draconis nebula, protected by the guns of Admiral Bear's Storm Base (image prior to Third Battle of Jacobi)

The swirling, unpredictable vortices of ionised gas present in the nebula prevent the flying-off of fighters under most conditions, and thus Admiral Bear has been able to focus the facilities of his command into a powerful synergy with Admiral Prefect's fleet. While massively armed itself, Storm Base has huge resupply and replenishment systems, which even during the harshest 'nebula blow' can quickly bring the fleet back to strength. After the Third Battle of Jacobi, when the enemy carrier fleet pursued the battlered SDN fleet to it's own staging ground, these abilities enabled Prefect to destroy most of the enemy carriers while they were unable to launch fighters or escape due to Storm Base's jump inhibitor technology. Enemy scouts are often caught unawares by the looming mass of Storm Base in the mist, and the unassuming Admiral Bear has done more to secure the security of the coreward frontier than most would like to admit.

Today we can also present a synthesis of all available information on the most frequently sighted Mb'eeni capital ship - their deadly fleet carrier.


Mb'eeni vessel 'Roach Three' attempts to escape Admiral Prefect's counterattack

Very little is known about this vessel in the civilian world beyond it's sinister, secretion-encrusted reporting name. What can be confirmed from eyewitness accounts is that it is capable of launching a great many fighters (some estimates place the total number at some three thousand) and directly attacking with a bizarre beam/plasma hybrid (thought to utilise some unknown aspect of phase technology to triplicate the flammability of any ceramics it encounters). The bizarre 'phase missiles' used by this vessel are often seen launching in vast swarms that seek out dozens of targets. The terrifying result of these weapons (which the media terms 'black un-explosions) have claimed dozens of fleet escorts in the combat at Jacobi. It is an agile craft, easily out-manouvring Admiral Prefect's fleet in many battles. SDN intelligence reports suggest the confirmed sighting of at least four of these great vessels, of which three have been destroyed, but interviews with eyewitnesses and allusions in Admiral Prefect's autobiography suggest the true number at this point may be closer to seventeen, a point used at the time to exhort the Novitiate to close the eponymous 'carrier gap'.

Naval thinkers have many questions about this vessel's design. No-one in SDN intelligence will discuss the obvious religious symbology in many aspects of it's design, and the implications therein. The obvious central 'Knob Shaft' feature is widely speculated to be responsible for various maladies reported in naval personnel through some unknown but malign mechanism. The use of phase missiles by Mb'enni strikecraft is strenuously denied by SDN authorities, but members of the SDN Tokash's crew have confirmed the heavy aft damage (closely studied in a remote repair facility after the battle) recieved during the Second Battle of Jacobi were inflicted by just this sort of weapon system. How is it that Mb'eeni fighters have been reported suddenly jumping from one area to another during combat? The truth may never be known for certain, given the events surrounding the end of the First Mb'eeni War.

Why are all our spaceships so ridiculously ugly? At least space looks really bright, so it drowns out the ugly features of our ships.

Ford Prefect wrote:Why are all our spaceships so ridiculously ugly? At least space looks really bright, so it drowns out the ugly features of our ships.

The TEC are the rough and ready type, they put engines and guns on flying boxes, and they damn well like it! Plus most of their fleet are converted freighters and construction ships.
Now the Advent are on the other end of the spectrum with eye-meltingly shiny ships.

As for the whole families on warships thing, the Akkan is a converted star liner hence it's civilian facilities.
Yes every side has a capital ship that can colonise, but colonisation in Sins' case is somewhat different, as all the planets are already populated by humans. Colonising is simply the act of sending administrators and starting up your infrastructure on the planet to claim it as yours, so it's actually doubtful there are families on board.

No they aren't. That's a load of horseshit fluff nonsense; these 'converted freighters' go toe-to-toe with an ancient unknowable alien race and super space laser lesbians. They're so 'improvised' they consistently have the best shit on the tech tree too. That crap about administrators is such a line of bullshit... the nukes are KILLING THE ADMINISTRATORS or something lol... ... asteroids have a native population... lolgasm.

Stark wrote:No they aren't. That's a load of horseshit fluff nonsense; these 'converted freighters' go toe-to-toe with an ancient unknowable alien race and super space laser lesbians. They're so 'improvised' they consistently have the best shit on the tech tree too. That crap about administrators is such a line of bullshit... the nukes are KILLING THE ADMINISTRATORS or something lol... ... asteroids have a native population... lolgasm.

Think of it as the official government line. You aren't killing the population- you are decapitating the leadership. Even though you can SEE the massive explosions on the surface and the space stations burning.

I believe the only units that really show tech disparity are the fighters- everything else is about equivalent.

Of course, knowing Stark, he is going to pop up with the power grab theory, with the TEC using the alien threat to slowly cement its grip on human civilization. Otherwise the story is stupid... okay, Stardock can't write for shit. I love their games, but their writing is worse than mine. I didn't think that was possible.

The LRM-equivalents are also pretty disparate, and the utility cruisers are all very different. However, TEC defences (for instance) get the most 'aggressive' upgrades (AA, LRM, long range, super armour for starbases, etc), they get trade faster and better (their bases can also support more trade) and their bonuses to diplomacy is a mid-game 'I win' button, and their LATE-game insurgency power is pretty much Jesus. The Zerg are good late-game, and the advent are good or competitive with their shield sploits (like the starbase invincible laser gun synergy), but it's not the same general success. It's not Conquest-level bad, where if you don't take humans you're doomed, but it's pretty bad.

Stardock stories are always fucking absurdly terrible. Have you seen the intros for the GalCiv games? Holy fucking shit, it's appalling.