StarDestroyer.Net BBS

Games aren't a waste of time. They're quite educational. I learned quite a bit about the real world. For example look at C&C Generals:

Being a shirtless American hero will make you invisible
Being a hot chinese chick with makeup will make you invisible
An arab sniper can snipe through inches of solid steel
Gattling guns can shoot planes thousands of feet in the air
One standard grunt can control any type of empty vehicle
A tank half as large as a barracks only needs one person to control it
Anthrax kills you in seconds and is also a blue sludge
One flashbang clears a 5-story building
You can own an unlimited supply of nukes, SCUD missiles, or your very own particle sattelite for $5000
You CAN get rich quick on the Internet
8 angry Arabs can destroy a city in minutes

Now why they don't put this stuff in the school curriculum is beyond me.

The Penultimate Ninja wrote:Being a shirtless American hero will make you invisible
Being a hot chinese chick with makeup will make you invisible

Oddly enough, I've noticed that both an American hero with makeup and a hot, shirtless Chinese chick are both at least 8 times as visible in real life in high school...

Gattling guns can shoot planes thousands of feet in the air

This one is wrong. The Gatling guns shoot down planes that always fly 20 feet in the air, never any higher.

BTW:

*Lasgun poke*

You forgot one: any type of radioactive or biochemical fallout will dissipate harmlessly in 20 seconds.

I learned that when I die, I can just hit the "Reset" button.

This one is wrong. The Gatling guns shoot down planes that always fly 20 feet in the air, never any higher.

Guess those millions in jet development went to the La-Z-Boy toilet seat then.

Never store a nuclear device in your place of residence without enough security to keep out a man wearing power armor and carrying a laser gatling gun.

Bad guys take the same amount of bullets to die, regardless of if they're hit in the head or the foot.

How about all of the high-tech explosive goodies that the bad-guys inevitably leave all over the place ready for you to use against them?

JediNeophyte wrote:

Gattling guns can shoot planes thousands of feet in the air

This one is wrong. The Gatling guns shoot down planes that always fly 20 feet in the air, never any higher.

One of the Delta force movies had an Iraqi mini gun miss a UH-1 moving at 20 knots flying about 50 feet away perhaps 10 feet in the air....

You can carry a damn near unlimited supply of weaponry and ammunition, and it won't slow you down at all.

[moron]wot game is dis? Half-life?![/moron]

Stuff I learned form AoK:TC:

It only takes one person to man a 15th century cannon
The best swordsmen don't use shields
Siege equipment moves at its own accord
When it comes to cavalry, the horse does the talking
Charles Martel died at Tours
The Templar Knights were avid Star Wars fans
The English used crossbows frequently
Wearing only plaid pants will make you go REALLY fast
" for guys wearing eagle masks
Neither the Chinese nor the Mongols used gunpowder
Naval combat was waged by throwing giant spears
Greek fire was not exclusively Byzantine
Chinese archers had rapidfire capabilities
Nobility always used white horses, most everyone else used brown ones, and the Mongols used black ones
Genghis Khan, Joan Darc, Sal-ad-din, Frederick Barbarossa, El Cid, Attila the Hun, and Cuautemoc all spoke English, abliet with accents
Samurai only used swords
Persian war elephant were so smart, they didn't have drivers
Waving a stick in the air will make someone switch allegiance
and, of course
Matinence? What's that?

There you have it, the rundown of history according to the best historical RTS in history!

As a side note, I stopped having nightmares many years ago. Or at least, dreams with scary monsters and deadly stuff stopped being nightmares with the inexplicable addition of a Reload button. So I guess some of this stuff is true.

From Moonwalker:

Michael Jackson has the power to make people dance with him, and then kill them afterwards.

Even though there's a cute, sweet girl you've been friendly with all your life, the One for you will always be the girl you run into quite by accident.

It's always safe to eat food that comes out of crates and trash cans. In fact, it will heal your wounds.

Meat and Mashed Potatoes can instantly heal any and all gunshot wounds.

IMO Wrong Forum.

Activating Trans-Mat!

Some more from AOK:

Villagers will have no qualms about fighting swordsmen, knights, or even castles, but you have to tell them first and after they're done.
Twenty war elephants can fit into a castle, but when one is filled with 20 champions, the 21st cannot find any room.
The most advanced Byzantine army can easily defeat the most advanced Turkish army.
Conversions were easy in the Middle Ages, an old man with a book waved at you...unless your religion had the concept of Heresy, because then you explode.
Persian war elephants are VERY smart, they can convert.
Frankish Paladins had no trouble running down British Longbowmen.
Huns didn't need houses.
Byzantine fortifications could be taken down by the simpliest of seige engines.

You can pick up a gun off the field and install it in a brand-new turret instantly.

Helicopters have little missile factories inside.

Here's some from Natural Selection:

Nanotechnology can build anything anywhere as long as a human is around.
A tiny dog-like creature can "evolve" into a giant rhino/elephent hybrid.
Gun muzzle flashes are fricken huge yet guns barely do damage to aliens.
Aliens are born by being defecated by a large "egg."
Marines are whiny brats that can't live without their toys.
Aliens build by having a fat pig thing vomit out structures.
The marines have never thought to use flamethrowers.
Upon getting their toys, the humans fly around like idiots and go off alone to get killed.

Counter-Strike:

If you have money, you can purchase weapons from thin air.
Jumping around like a monkey on crack is a viable survival technique.
Every counter-terrorist operative and terrorist operative in the world have the exact same voice.

TFC:
You can fire 4 high explosive rockets into a HW and he'll still still be alive.

Medics and instantly heal anybody by running up to you and pressing a few buttons, and engineers can repair armor by whacking you with a wrench a couple times, provided they carry enough scrap metal around.

Snipers can increase damage dealt by their rifles by holding the trigger button down for awhile first.

Rocking jumping (Shooting a rocket at your feet to use the explosion to propell you farther than you regularly can) is a viable tactic, and should be actively done to suprise enemy snipers.

You can run around on fire for about 40 seconds and still be barely touched.

High-explosive packs the size of half an adult have an invisible blast radius of about 10 meters.

Spies can instantly disguise to change into a member of the enemy team within seconds while on the move.

Medics can spread a highly contagious pathogen which kills in seconds, unless you run around picking up medpacks, in which case you can infect your whole team before dying.

Here's some stuff that I learned from video games:

Most corpses dissapear soon after dying, except for a few (Perfect Dark)
With only a few hundred dollars, you can get away with just about any crime. (GTA:VC)
Firing two rocket launchers at once does no bodily harm. You can also reload both of them in less than a second (GoldenEye)
Bread is as good as healing a gunshot as medical equipment (Medal of Honor: Frontline)

And most importantly:

Save often, so you won't lose anything when you mess up and need to reset.

Starcraft - Hydralisks can shoot spines at capital ships and down them.

Doom - You can fall a thousand miles and be unscratched.

Darth Gojira wrote: The best swordsmen don't use shields

For rank defensive work, shields are good.....swordsman on swordsman.....they can be a big hindrance.....