The Death of the Gnomes...

MKSheppard · Post by **MKSheppard** » 2003-07-01 06:19pm

Deep under Sheppard's house, scores of Gnomes worked in the
darkness, laboring to break into his house, to kill him and spread the word of
the Gnome, when all of a sudden, a loud roaring noise came through the
tunnel they were attempting to climb up, and within moments the
gnomes were buried under a mountain of brown shit.

"Aaah it burns it burns!" shouted the leader of the Gnome assassin squad
as the shit ate away at his face.

20 feet above the screaming Gnomes, Sheppard chuckled and pulled
his pants up. It always felt good to unleash a new BOMBING RAID on
the SEWER GNOMES.

thecreech · Post by **thecreech** » 2003-07-01 06:23pm

do you have Gonorrhea or something?

EDIT: never mind. you crapped on them not pee'd which would mean you have an entirely different problem if you crapped on them and their faces melted off

Post by **Sea Skimmer** » 2003-07-01 06:27pm

Should this be in gaming?

As the Gnomes worked to free themselves from the mountain of shit, they didn't notice as a hose dropped down a nearby manhole. Thousands of gallons of liquid flooded in, rising up to their necks. Fearful of drowning they worked faster to free themselves. Suddenly the hose was withdrawn and there was the sound of a flare being cracked open. "Enjoy the fun," shouted Sea Skimmer as he tossed the lit flare down into the sewers. He ran back from the manhole just in time to escape the forty-foot column of flame shooting out, followed by many more as every manhole within three blocks was blown off by the explosion and flames.

Mitth`raw`nuruodo · Post by **Mitth`raw`nuruodo** » 2003-07-01 06:36pm

I thought everyone decided to stop doing this? And ya, it needs to be in Gaming, if it's supposed to be more than a one-sided Gnome bashing.

Stravo · Post by **Stravo** » 2003-07-01 06:38pm

Thread moved to gaming...and for the life of me I won't ever understand this gnome business....

Darksider · Post by **Darksider** » 2003-07-01 06:38pm

::::Darksider grinned at the decimation of the Gnomes and pulled out an M16 with an attached 40mm grenade launcher and moved down into the sewers to hunt any remainaing Gnomes::::

Durandal · Post by **Durandal** » 2003-07-01 06:39pm

MKSheppard wrote:Deep under Sheppard's house, scores of Gnomes worked in the darkness, laboring to break into his house, to kill him and spread the word of the Gnome, when all of a sudden, a loud roaring noise came through the tunnel they were attempting to climb up, and within moments the gnomes were buried under a mountain of brown shit.

"Aaah it burns it burns!" shouted the leader of the Gnome assassin squad as the shit ate away at his face.

20 feet above the screaming Gnomes, Sheppard chuckled and pulled his pants up. It always felt good to unleash a new BOMBING RAID on the SEWER GNOMES.

So simple, yet so twisted and funny.

Brother-Captain Gaius · Post by **Brother-Captain Gaius** » 2003-07-01 06:52pm

BURNiNATE the gnomes!

Darksider · Post by **Darksider** » 2003-07-01 06:54pm

::::::Darksider spots a live gnome, twitching with a third of it's face melted away:::::

No mercy

:::: Darksider opens fire and blasts the Gnome apart, the continues his hunt::::

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-07-01 07:03pm

ENOUGH!

::sends an army of super sour intestinal attack oranges up shep's fat ass, laughs maniacally as they come out of his mouth and explode along with shep's head::

Now, before shep regrows that bizarre proboscis he calls a head, i shall cut off his trigger fingers and put them up his bum, then glue it shut.

Now, to think of a way to deal with that skimmer of the seas...

::returns to the orange star::

Darksider · Post by **Darksider** » 2003-07-01 07:08pm

Rye wrote:ENOUGH!

::sends an army of super sour intestinal attack oranges up shep's fat ass, laughs maniacally as they come out of his mouth and explode along with shep's head::

Now, before shep regrows that bizarre proboscis he calls a head, i shall cut off his trigger fingers and put them up his bum, then glue it shut.

Now, to think of a way to deal with that skimmer of the seas...

::returns to the orange star::

::::: Darksider opens fire on the Orange Gnomes in the pipes, sending Armor pericing rounds and grenades at them in massive portions:::

Post by **Alyrium Denryle** » 2003-07-01 07:10pm

RAPIDFIREDOKEN!

Post by **Sea Skimmer** » 2003-07-01 07:12pm

Rye wrote: Now, to think of a way to deal with that skimmer of the seas...

::returns to the orange star::

A HAB Vigilant class light cruiser approached the star. Captain, stellar mass directly ahead, shall we alter course?" Of course not fool, fire the starbreakers!" Dozens of missiles shot for the vessels forward tubes, lancing deep into the star before blowing it apart in a supernova before the remains where destroyed by further salvos. The cruise moved on, easily crusing through the scattered remains.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-07-01 07:17pm

Activate darkstar wall of ignorance tech!

::walls go up, projectiles OBVIOUSLY missed. God, do i have to make it SO OBVIOUS?!::

activate citrus superlaser!

::orange star aims at the troublesome neighbourhood::

::stands back and is bathed in the acidic orange radiation, and watches sea skimmer's local area blast apart at near lightspeed, the resulting blastwave levelling shep's shack and the black mages::

MKSheppard · Post by **MKSheppard** » 2003-07-01 07:28pm

Rye wrote:ENOUGH!
::sends an army of super sour intestinal attack oranges up shep's fat ass, laughs maniacally as they come out of his mouth and explode along with shep's head::

Unfortunately, for the Gnomes, that was merely the drop-down decoy
dummy that automatically swung down whenever Sheppard stood up from the toilet...

Giggling insanely, Shep produces a Walther P-38 and sets off to shoot the
leader of the Gnome revolution

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-07-01 07:36pm

MKSheppard wrote:
Rye wrote:ENOUGH!
::sends an army of super sour intestinal attack oranges up shep's fat ass, laughs maniacally as they come out of his mouth and explode along with shep's head::
Unfortunately, for the Gnomes, that was merely the drop-down decoy
dummy that automatically swung down whenever Sheppard stood up from the toilet...

Giggling insanely, Shep produces a Walther P-38 and sets off to shoot the
leader of the Gnome revolution

::giggles at shep's inept nature::

our dauntless leader isn't back till tomorrow!

Giant Dominatrix orange! subdue this fool, engage darkstar wall of ignorance! His puny projectile weaponry cannot harm you!

Captain Cyran · Post by **Captain Cyran** » 2003-07-01 07:41pm

Alyrium Denryle wrote:RAPIDFIREDOKEN!

Hehehe, gotta love the dokens...oh, bye the way. I just remembered I have this one.

*Cyran looks at a large group of incoming garden gnomes.* EYE BEAMS!

*Cyran watches as the gnomes melt into a pile of hot goo.* Hehehe...

Post by **Sea Skimmer** » 2003-07-01 08:31pm

Rye wrote:
::stands back and is bathed in the acidic orange radiation, and watches sea skimmer's local area blast apart at near lightspeed, the resulting blastwave levelling shep's shack and the black mages::

Or so might have happened had Sea Skimmer not had his bullshit defeat shield activated, protecting him from all darkstar tech. In turn another cruiser arrived, unleashing a hail of logic. When ever it impacted with the anti logic based darkstar tech the tech was vaporized by the massive resulting blast. Within seconds the Gnomes where completely disarmed.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-07-01 09:30pm

Sea Skimmer wrote:
Or so might have happened had Sea Skimmer not had his bullshit defeat shield activated, protecting him from all darkstar tech. In turn another cruiser arrived, unleashing a hail of logic. When ever it impacted with the anti logic based darkstar tech the tech was vaporized by the massive resulting blast. Within seconds the Gnomes where completely disarmed.

Dang. Second giant orange dominatrix! restrain him!

::watches as the giant orange dominatrix grapples with sea skimmer and bends him over and spanks him in front of everyone, saying things like "bitch, slut, you broken down m1 tank you" etc::

Typhonis 1 · Post by **Typhonis 1** » 2003-07-01 11:12pm

*a man sized casing lands near the nearest gnomes it opens and they all reveret to harmless lawn ornaments.Col Jack O` neil steps out with a sledge hammer and procedes to hit them with it*

Post by **RogueIce** » 2003-07-01 11:31pm

WHat'd we ever do to you all anyway? I swear, more one sided Gnome bashing?

Ever think that may be way they shut the others down? I mean, geez...

Ah well, that's it...

*goes in search of allies, as this Everyone vs Gnomes is getting a bit tiring after five repititions*

Agent Fisher · Post by **Agent Fisher** » 2003-07-02 11:30am

Looking at the battlefeild from the safety of GIA HQ, Fisher watches as the gnomes are being slaughtered.

"Maybe it is time to stop and lick our wounds"

ooc: come on it is time to let it die. there will never be a winner.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-07-02 01:53pm

RogueIce wrote:WHat'd we ever do to you all anyway? I swear, more one sided Gnome bashing?

Ever think that may be way they shut the others down? I mean, geez...

Ah well, that's it...

*goes in search of allies, as this Everyone vs Gnomes is getting a bit tiring after five repititions*

Lure them into a cross fire! It can't be that hard, they're all crosseyed Asshole's anyway.

Anarchist Bunny · Post by **Anarchist Bunny** » 2003-07-02 02:42pm

"looks around at the now wasteland of scortched earth a tiny limbs, no sounds come from rubble except for the drunken cheers of the victors*

God damnit, I always miss the fun.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-07-02 02:49pm

anarchistbunny wrote:"looks around at the now wasteland of scortched earth a tiny limbs, no sounds come from rubble except for the drunken cheers of the victors*

God damnit, I always miss the fun.

Well Sea Skimmer's still getting spanked, you could throw rotten oranges at him if you want!

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