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Stupidiest Scam... Ever.
Posted: 2003-07-28 07:45am
by Embracer Of Darkness
This appeared amongst my email this morning. Needless to say, I couldn't help laughing.
Hello,
I'm a time traveler stuck here in 2003. Upon arriving here my dimensional warp generator stopped working. I trusted a company here by the name of LLC Lasers to repair my Generation 3 52 4350A watch unit, and they fled on me. I am going to need a new DWG unit, prefereably the rechargeable AMD wrist watch model with the GRC79 induction motor, four I80200 warp stabilizers, 512GB of SRAM and the menu driven GUI with front panel XID display.
I will take whatever model you have in stock, as long as its received certification for being safe on carbon based life forms.
In terms of payment:
I dont have any Galactic Credits left. Payment can be made in platinum gold or 2003 currency upon safe delivery of unit.
Please transport unit in either a large brown paper bag or box to below coordinates on Monday July 28th at (exactly 3:00pm) Eastern Standard Time on the dot. A few minutes prior will be ok, but it cannot be after. If you miss this timeframe please email me.
Twenty-three inches in from the outside edge of the corner at the South West
Corner of Cummings Ave. & Village Street in Woburn, Mass. is at Latitude
42.4845467 & Longitude -71.1576157 and the ground is 101.3' above sea level.
WARNING: DO NOT ATTEMPT TO TRANSPORT ITEM BY REGULAR MEANS OF TELEPORTATION. THEY ARE MONITORING AND WILL REDIRECT THE SIGNAL!!
(NOBODY HAS BEEN ABLE TO TRANSPORT ANYTHING SO FAR WITHOUT THE TRANSFER BEING DEFLECTED). I DO NOT CARE HOW YOU HAVE TO GET IT HERE, JUST DO IT IN A WAY THAT NO SPYING EYES WILL POSSIBLY BE ABLE TO REDIRECT THE TRANSFERENCE. IT IS VERY IMPORTANT THAT YOU BE ABLE TO MONITOR THE TRANSFER.
Although those coordinates are a secure guarded area, these channels through email are never secure. Unfortunately it is the only form of communication I have right now.
After unit has been sent please email me at:
info@federalfundingprogram.com
with payment instructions. Do not reply directly back to this email.
Thank You
steamer
wtiylifl ca c
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Posted: 2003-07-28 07:55am
by Mitth`raw`nuruodo
:wtf::wtf:
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA... LMFAO!
<insert equivalent of Einy's huge rainbow-colored acronym>
Posted: 2003-07-28 08:08am
by Companion Cube
ROTFLMFAO!
Posted: 2003-07-28 08:34am
by Enforcer Talen
lol. . .these people need a hobby.
Posted: 2003-07-28 09:18am
by Straha
Enforcer Talen wrote:lol. . .these people need a hobby.
I think this IS their hobby...
Posted: 2003-07-28 09:26am
by SHODAN
And what a fine hobby it is.
Posted: 2003-07-28 12:10pm
by The Duchess of Zeon
If someone shows up there, they're gonna get mugged.
Posted: 2003-07-28 12:36pm
by Sea Skimmer
The Duchess of Zeon wrote:If someone shows up there, they're gonna get mugged.
That or a water balloon full of paint will strike from above while others laugh.
Posted: 2003-07-28 01:00pm
by darthdavid
HJFCOAPSLHOAWPSC
Posted: 2003-07-28 04:29pm
by Enforcer Talen
wait. . . HJFCOAPSLHOAWPSC?
Posted: 2003-07-28 04:31pm
by Mitth`raw`nuruodo
Enforcer Talen wrote:wait. . . HJFCOAPSLHOAWPSC?
Holy Jesus Fucking Christ On A Pogo Stick Licking His Own Ass While Playing Star Craft
Posted: 2003-07-28 07:20pm
by kojikun
Posted: 2003-07-28 07:40pm
by Enforcer Talen
Mitth-raw-nuruodo wrote:Enforcer Talen wrote:wait. . . HJFCOAPSLHOAWPSC?
Holy Jesus Fucking Christ On A Pogo Stick Licking His Own Ass While Playing Star Craft
Posted: 2003-07-28 07:43pm
by Enforcer Talen
christ, I could walk there in an afternoon.
Posted: 2003-07-28 07:47pm
by Darth Garden Gnome
Great Scott! Quick everyone, Doc Brown needs our help! Marty, Einstein, to the time-machine! *cue BTTF theme: doo dee dum diddy dum diddy dum*
MARTY: You better back up Mike, looks like there's not enough road.
ME: Roads? We don't need roads.
WHOOSH!
Posted: 2003-07-28 08:20pm
by YT300000
Cummings Ave, I see.
Posted: 2003-07-28 08:56pm
by aphexmonster
SHODAN wrote:And what a fine hobby it is.
i concur
Posted: 2003-07-28 09:10pm
by darthdavid
It's inbetween cummings ave and middlesex streed.
Posted: 2003-07-29 04:51am
by EmperorMing
Enforcer Talen wrote:Mitth-raw-nuruodo wrote:Enforcer Talen wrote:wait. . . HJFCOAPSLHOAWPSC?
Holy Jesus Fucking Christ On A Pogo Stick Licking His Own Ass While Playing Star Craft
Ditto...
Posted: 2003-07-30 12:49am
by DPDarkPrimus
I'd email him back and say that I need to get paid two weeks ago, and then I'll do it.
Posted: 2003-07-30 01:10am
by kojikun
DPDarkPrimus wrote:I'd email him back and say that I need to get paid two weeks ago, and then I'll do it.
That is the best response to this kind of email. Ever.
Posted: 2003-07-30 01:36am
by DPDarkPrimus
I'm just so damn witty sometimes.
Posted: 2003-07-30 02:02am
by Crayz9000
Think we should organize a posse and go check the place out?
Who knows, maybe it's DarkStar's lair!
