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Absurd situations in historical games

Posted: 2005-03-25 11:58am
by Karza
World's full of games where you can rewrite history. Civilization, Total War series, etc. What kind of absurd situations have you created in these games?

My two favorites are:

In Medieval: Total War (with Viking Invasion) while playing the English, I eventually found myself in a situation, where the English are fighting the Egyptians on the plains of Chernygov (shortly after the English had conquered Russia)... And the English forces consist mainly of Viking Landsmenn, with the odd knight and Spanish Jinete tossed in. It was a weird moment, watching vikings supported by Spanish riding javelinmen fight some sort of camel riders on russian plains :D.

In Civilization 2, there was a war that definitely never happened: after a long rivalry, open hostilities finally began between the Finnish and their age-old nemesis: the Sioux. The outcome was that the Finnish marines defeated the Sioux ski-troops, and Finland became the sole nation on this little island located pretty close to the equator. Oh, and the war was fought in the 15th century...

Posted: 2005-03-25 12:25pm
by Vendetta
One of my most memorabble Civ 1 games included a massive inter-hemisphere war between my hardy Englishman, who had conquered the northern half of the map, and the impressive Roman empire who dominated the south.

It eventually went nuclear.

Posted: 2005-03-25 05:40pm
by irishmick79
I had a game of Europa Universalis where Japan was the shining light of the Asian continent. The Rising Sun illuminated the northern shores of california and alaska in the east and kissed the tip of the Ural mountains in the west. Then rebellions kicked in, and everything went to shit. But it was glorious while it lasted.

Posted: 2005-03-25 05:50pm
by Petrosjko
Civ one at the hardest difficulty... Deity level, I believe.

Perkin' right along with my little German nation, had some nasty fights with my neighboring Greeks and Russians, managed to come out ahead... barely.

OH!

JOY!

Here come the Zulu armored forces, landing on my coast!

Lessee... I'll just drive them off with my... cavalry. HORSE CAVALRY.

It did not end well.

Posted: 2005-03-25 06:03pm
by Losonti Tokash
Civ3: After hundreds of years of peace with the German people and an extremely long border, the bastards declared war on me (the French) and hundreds of panzers streamed over the border. Or, at least, they would have, if not for a force of modern armor that stretched all along said border and were stacked 10 or more deep.

Nukes were exchanged the next turn. So many, in fact, that cities everywhere starved as their grasslands/flood plains were turned into desert. Inexplicably, a hill was also turned into a desert by global warming.

A Rise of Nations CTW game saw an alliance between the Americans, Russians, and the...Mongols?

Posted: 2005-03-25 06:17pm
by Stormbringer
This was my absurdity in the Rise and Rule mod for Civ3:

I had been playing the Vikings and because the map was an archipeligo setup all the seafaring civs got off to a very good start. The primary empires were myself, the Spanish, and the Polynesians. Egypt, Russia, and the Greeks all had good ones as well.

At the start I had gained a toe-hold on one of the 'continents' that Polynesia held. I had smashed the Celts who had been raiding my shipping and generally making themselves a nuisance to my merchantile empire. They were a bug and I smashed them. Well, I had conquered them when the Polynesians went fundamentalist and went apeshit on me. They had a mountain range that was nearly impossible to breach, they had forts along a good stretch of it. There were some major armored clashes on the plains in front of them, both of us had Main Battle Tanks and Mechanized Infantry so it was nasty. Several cities changed hands a couple of times.

Well, finally I made the break through. I got Air Cav units and supported by fire (much, much more lethal in this mod) from my battleships and bombings I hooked them around the defensive line and actually managed to hit them hard. That toe hold allowed me to send troops in directly, thank you Transport Aircraft! I airlifted a couple armies as well as a horde of infantry in and then after a grinding battle of attrition forced him to sue for peace. I took a couple port cities in payment and made peace for the time being.

All in the mid to late 1600s.


Of course that doesn't begin to cover the Greco-Egyptian War which broke out a few decades later....

Posted: 2005-03-25 06:50pm
by InnocentBystander
Petrosjko wrote:Civ one at the hardest difficulty... Deity level, I believe.

Perkin' right along with my little German nation, had some nasty fights with my neighboring Greeks and Russians, managed to come out ahead... barely.

OH!

JOY!

Here come the Zulu armored forces, landing on my coast!

Lessee... I'll just drive them off with my... cavalry. HORSE CAVALRY.

It did not end well.
The new hardest mode is called Sid, they get modern armor just a few minutes after you finish your second settler, if I recall correctly :twisted:

Posted: 2005-03-25 07:12pm
by HemlockGrey
I remember one EU game where I started out as the Byzantines (1 province, Ottoman vassal, shit income, small army) and by the end of the game had restored all of Justinian's conquests.

EDIT: Plus, I conquered Mexico and colonized most of N. America.

Also, I recently played a Victoria game where Brazil turned most of the south American countries into puppet states, took over a big chunk of provinces in SA, colonized Patagonia, built up a tidy Indonesian empire, annexed Cuba, conquered territory along the southwest of Africa, colonized Niger, Nigeria, and the Congo, and built up a huge central African empire.

Posted: 2005-03-25 10:09pm
by weemadando
Bottling up the Zulus in Africa in a game of CivII - it was working well until they nuked the entire northern hemisphere in one turn. In 1620...