StarDestroyer.Net BBS

So, in Empire Strikes Back, there's a guy in cloud city. He's evactuating the city, like legions of other extras...with an ice cream machine under his arm.



Needless to say, the EU has made up a backstory where he works for a company that supplies tibanna gass to the rebels and is evacuating the city with a computer core that has all the company's contact information for their rebel cell. But why evacuate it? Why not just destroy it? Why can't there be ice cream salesmen working with very small batches of ice cream? Or why not just leave well enough alone, shrug and say that the backstory of Willrow Hood is no more important than anyone else who's evacuating?

SD.net, I await your judgment on this matter. What is the deal with the Ice Cream Machine Guy?

I don't care what they say about him, he's always going to be the Bespin Ice Cream Maker Guy.

He's a guy leaving the city with an Ice Cream machine. The EU's ability to assign significance to every single fucking person in the galaxy is just pathetic. Can't they just be satisfied with a random guy going about his life who will never be remotely important?

He has to be important -- he's got his own action figure after all!

But what about the guy in front of him, also holding another object? An object that looked like some sort of power core? Perhaps some sort of super-ancient Wutdahfuk artefact, that plugged into Coruscant, transforms it into this...

I could see him hiding the computer in the ice cream machine.

I don't see why he would have the motivation to do that for the Rebels, unless he was paid, disgruntled, or the Empire had started cracking down hard on anyone that doesn't serve "Imperial White" vanilla ice cream.

I'd say it is pretty obvious that the ice cream machine is brand new and he hasn't had time to try it out yet, so he can't just leave that thing behind now can he.


The other explanation is that when he heard the Empire had taken over he panicked and went "Shit the Empire is here? Oh fuck shit, I gotta go! What should I take with me, can't take it all... shit shit shit... TV... too big... shit shit... Ice cream maker! GOooooo!"

It should be ice cream.
Because it if is, then there is canon evidence that SW has ice cream! And a society without ice cream is just not worth living in. Which explains why this guy is risking live and limb for his ice cream - it has to be defended against the evil empire to save society!

(BTW, there seems to be no ice cream in Trek - more evidence for their tyranny!)

Obviously it´s an ancient mandalorian Man Stone that holds the essence of the countless jedi killed by the Space Spartans. Coming to a brief close contact with Leia awakes her budding force ability letting her later sense Luke´s unmanly pleas, thus SAVING THE GALAXY. It´s meaningful andepic, see.

...Or it´s a minute setpiece in a movie that´s getting ruined and wanked over by obsessive fanboy bullshit, I dunno.

Vehrec wrote:SD.net, I await your judgment on this matter. What is the deal with the Ice Cream Machine Guy?

He's yet another example of the EU wanting to make a story no one but the most ardent of fans will give a fuck about.

Serafina wrote:(BTW, there seems to be no ice cream in Trek - more evidence for their tyranny!)

Ice cream is mentioned and shown in at least one episode of TOS and one episode of TNG.

Uraniun235 wrote: Ice cream is mentioned and shown in at least one episode of TOS and one episode of TNG.

Indeed. It was featured rather heavily in "The Game", where Troi was having a chocogasm over her dish.

Troi was constantly babbling on about chocolate ice cream and sundaes and shit.

I don't remember the episode, but I do remember one where Troi was giving a blowjob to a hot fudge sundae, while Riker was sitting there smiling like a pervert. I wonder if Frakes knew that he played Riker as a fatty perv, or if that's just Frakes?

"The Game"

"Chocolate is a serious thing"

And unless he's wearing a Kirk-GirdleTM, Frakes isn't too fat at this point.

Kinda hot and bear like in fact, but maybe that's just me. I couldn't stand clean-shaven Riker.

Clean shaven Riker is alright, but the beard makes him look distinguished, and made his character work so much better.

And god I had to lol at that video.

eion wrote: "Chocolate is a serious thing"

And unless he's wearing a Kirk-GirdleTM, Frakes isn't too fat at this point.

Kinda hot and bear like in fact, but maybe that's just me. I couldn't stand clean-shaven Riker.

It's quite clear from that clip that the sexual innuendo was the director's intent. More than half of the ice cream commercials I see on TV are highly sexualized.

Dooey Jo wrote:The other explanation is that when he heard the Empire had taken over he panicked and went "Shit the Empire is here? Oh fuck shit, I gotta go! What should I take with me, can't take it all... shit shit shit... TV... too big... shit shit... Ice cream maker! GOooooo!"

The action figure prop has the Rebel Alliance symbol on the bottom. Willrow obviously recognized that this would be a collector's item as the Rebel Alliance would soon either a) be wiped out or b) overthrow the Empire and become the New Republic. Either way, once the RA disappeared genuine RA collectibles would be worth a mint.

Willrow Hood is running in terror now, but he'll return in triumph once he buys Cloud City with the awesome money he will make selling his Official Rebel Alliance(tm) Ice Cream Machine [mint out of box] on HyperBay.