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I was barreling down Old Country Road tonight with a fake tree in the backseat when my mind turned to Ewoks.

I have come up with a very weird theory regarding them: they are not from Endor's moon. Think about it:

• Wouldn't the destruction of Endor have wiped out quite a bit of the indigenous life on the moon, if it existed before the destruction?
• Endor is often referred to as the "Sanctuary Moon". Why, unless it was a sanctuary of sorts?
• C-3PO said that the language was a variant of a merchant dialect and picked it up very fast.

Crackpot theory, but there you have it. Thoughts?

Sanctuary refers to its forested nature, I think.

I don't get your first point, though...

Sure, why not? Just because the Ewoks are on the planet doesnt mean they're not feral.

Spanky The Dolphin wrote:Sanctuary refers to its forested nature, I think.

But that doesn't fit any connotation of "sanctuary" that I know of. A sanctuary is a refuge, a place of safety. A "do not touch" place. For some reason, Endor's moon was considered a sanctuary for... something.

I don't get your first point, though...

We see Endor's moon. Endor itself is not there. Getting rid of Endor would likely cause trouble for the now former moon, especially if Endor was destroyed. (How else does one get rid of a planet; either that, or Endor is now Corellia or something...)

And the third point is a very good one. The Ewok's language is known (they speak a dialect of a known language), even though the Ewoks themselves aren't very well known. The Ewoks had to have picked up their language from some other culture, or else have given their language to another culture. Either way, the Ewoks have had contact with a space-faring culture.

I think Ewoks are the nefarious creation of The Dwarf Society! Someone get me a drink!

Silence, |\|00b!!

*KICK*

You're supposed to poke them, like so! *POKE!*

I think its a big POKE the noob

Atomik Chicken is a well-known ASVSer, so cut out the pokage and get back on topic, please.

Spanky The Dolphin wrote:Silence, |\|00b!!

*KICK*

Wow, you must like me...

DPDarkPrimus wrote:You're supposed to poke them, like so! *POKE!*

Is it wrong for someone to poke themselves?

Dalton wrote:Atomik Chicken is a well-known ASVSer, so cut out the pokage and get back on topic, please.

Sorry, thinks get OT when I show up...

Perhaps the Ewoks were relocated to their moon by some sort of preservation society after their original world was either destroyed or colonized or something of that nature. The new world, the Endor moon, was bought and declared a national reserve.

The DS2 Project would be like the US building a missile silo in the middle of Yosemite.

It was probably set aside as a Sanctuary way back in Republic times, and the only thing left in the Registry later is "Sanctuary Moon" even though it'd been forgotten as such.

Thus, no controversy.

Illuminatus Primus wrote:It was probably set aside as a Sanctuary way back in Republic times, and the only thing left in the Registry later is "Sanctuary Moon" even though it'd been forgotten as such.

Thus, no controversy.

Maybe it was forgotten about when the planet Endor disappeard, then the Endor name got added to the Sanctuary Moon title.

The only possible problem is that the planet is seen in the sky while the Towani's (sp?) visit the Moon in the Ewok TV movies, which couldn't have been more than a decade before the Empire found the location again.

The Ewok movies are pretty low on the canon tier, Spanky.

Does that mean we ignore it?

The movies and books are more canon than the Ewoks series. As I recall it (The ROTJ novel) mentions that the planet Endor was destroyed long before the Empire set up shop there.

Marc Xavier wrote:Perhaps the Ewoks were relocated to their moon by some sort of preservation society after their original world was either destroyed or colonized or something of that nature. The new world, the Endor moon, was bought and declared a national reserve.

The DS2 Project would be like the US building a missile silo in the middle of Yosemite.

That's a pretty good theory. It would explain why their language is related to known languages in the SW universe.

DPDarkPrimus wrote:The Ewok movies are pretty low on the canon tier, Spanky.

They are still in the realms of Official, Dido.

Hey wait....aren't we all ignoring something? Why the hell does Dalton have a fake tree in the back of his car???

There is just one problem with this: WHY IN THE NAME OF GOD WOULD YOU WANT TO SAVE EWOKS?!

Their like Tribbles without the soothing cooing. They worship C-3PO; how smart can they be to worship the droid designed after the girly guy from Will and Grace? Saying Ewok in the Empire is a turnoff to most women and stuffed bears are illegal because of the resemblance.

I like Ewoks, but they just aren't worth the fuel to save.

Lord Poe wrote:Hey wait....aren't we all ignoring something? Why the hell does Dalton have a fake tree in the back of his car???

Because he is a dendrophilliac, and on back country roads, there aren't many trees around...

Damn it, Admiral, don't spam with your riff-raff... This is a real discussion not a playground thread.