StarDestroyer.Net BBS

here is a site that picks apart the PT and SE of Star Wars

http://www.chefelf.com/starwars/ep1.php

It is incredably irritating.

acording to this guy:
There are 78 reasons while TPM is bad
There are 64 reasons while AOTC is bad
There are 12 reasons while the SE of ANH is bad
There are 9 reasons while the SE of ESB is bad
There are 17 reasons while the SE of ROTJ is bad

And I think there are 182 reasons why someone is a dumbass

Adamskywalker007 wrote:here is a site that picks apart the PT and SE of Star Wars

http://www.chefelf.com/starwars/ep1.php

It is incredably irritating.

acording to this guy:
There are 78 reasons while TPM is bad
There are 64 reasons while AOTC is bad
There are 12 reasons while the SE of ANH is bad
There are 9 reasons while the SE of ESB is bad
There are 17 reasons while the SE of ROTJ is bad

And I think there are 182 reasons why someone is a dumbass

What complete imbicile. Here are a couple of jems from TPM.

Reason #13
A Fish Tries to Eat Them
I'm pretty sure fish don't eat metal.

Reason #14
"There's always a bigger fish."
A bigger fish eats the fish that was trying to eat them. Qui-Gon should be wiser than this. Can't he see the fault in his logic? How can there always be a bigger fish? I think a more accurate line would be: "There's usually a bigger fish." It's a lot like God making a boulder so heavy that he couldn't lift it. I think Qui-Gon's statement will one day be the focus of a great deal of University philosophical debate.

Complete disregard for the shape of the Bongo and the basic consept of fishing. And an utterly moronic attack on semantics so anal it boggles the mind.

That reason alone cried BULLSHIT in my mind. I mean, this guy is so pathetic I didn't even try to read it all. Going after Qui-Gon for his one liner? Good fucking night, I guess Jedi can't have a sense of humor.
- Ra

Reason #13
A Fish Tries to Eat Them
I'm pretty sure fish don't eat metal.

So no fish in the history of our world has ever been caught by a metalic fishing lure?

Fish #1 "That sure looks tasty!"

Fish #2 "Don't eat that stupid, it's made of metal, and we don't eat metal, no matter how much it looks like food"

What a tool

The thing about Anakin not making 3PO because the droid knows things in Episode 4 that Anakin couldn't program into him. He's a droid, you can add programming, and for building him, he probably took parts from other droids that were scrapped.

This man is a genius. I love that site...

This is just sad. For his TPM nitpicks, he says that the hyperdrive should be put right in the middle of the ship. The propulsion device. Buried in the ship. Great idea, lets go tell the Air Force that they've been doing it all wrong and they need their jets' engines to be completely enclosed deep underneath the exterior of the jets. Never mind that more important things should go there, such as the reactor that powers everything on the ship...

Okay, his other nitpicks suck, but the Holiday Special review is PRICELESS.

Chewie tells them that he knew all along that Boba was a bad guy. "Why is that?" Luke asks. Threepio translates, "Because he simply didn't smell right." Then they all laugh. Oh, how they laugh. They laugh at Chewbacca's primitive nature and reliance on his sense of smell. Oh, it must be great fun to be a collection of racists aboard a starship.

I read his "78 reasons to hate TPM" before AOTC was released, and subsequently read his "64 reasons to hate AOTC". He's way off base, and his nitpicks about the SEs/DVDs are even more offensive (for example #2 and #4 about the ESB DVD).
Look at his first page dealing with AOTC, he writes:

They [letters explaining why the movies are good, according to him they make up about 1 %] always include information which is aimed at getting me to rethink my opinions. While I usually respect the people who write these emails, they never do anything to change my opinion.

Look at #57 for AOTC labelled "The Helmet". He says it "defies logic" that Jango's head didn't fall out of the helmet when Boba picked it up. It would defy logic if it had done so, since Jango's head and helmet seperated while in the air (as seen in the shadows on the ground, I caught that in my first viewing of AOTC in theater).

He may think whatever he wishes, but his "reasons" to hate the SW movie are, in my opinion, quite ridiculous. They're only nitpicks, and you can nitpick about every movie out there.

Oh come one! You guys are taking this WAY Too seriously! Lighten up a little and learn to laugh at what you love!

Sure, more then half of all his nitpics are inane, silly, and overly stupid. But that doesn't mean they still can't be funny! It's a sad thing when the fans of something become so obbsessed and so serious about something that they can't laugh at it. That path, leads to the dark side of Fan-ism

Learn to laugh, it's healthy!

Well, it's rather obvious that this guy is a movie purist. A lot of the stuff he nitpicks is addressed in canon literature, of which he is clearly ignorant.

I would be happier if his name were something like Darth Truder, Darth Cendiary or more appropriately Darth Ane.

Ok, so I laughed at this. Darth Cendiary

Does anybody remember www.ihatestarwars.com ?

Reason #45
Jawas
Jawas appear sporadically throughout the Tatooine segments. They never say anything except the classic Jawa line: "Oonteenee!" I wonder if they are speaking Huttese or if they have their own language. Either way, their brains must be unusually small if their only expression seems to be: "Oonteenee!"

"Hey Jawa, you just won the lottery!"

"Oonteenee!"

"Hey Jawa, your mom just died!"

"Oonteenee!"

"Hey Jawa, you have a nice butt."

"Oonteenee!"

This was the funniest thing I've read in quite some time.

Crossroads Inc. wrote:Oh come one! You guys are taking this WAY Too seriously! Lighten up a little and learn to laugh at what you love!

Sure, more then half of all his nitpics are inane, silly, and overly stupid. But that doesn't mean they still can't be funny! It's a sad thing when the fans of something become so obbsessed and so serious about something that they can't laugh at it. That path, leads to the dark side of Fan-ism

Learn to laugh, it's healthy!

From what I read, it isn't close to funny. His arguments are trollish and stupid. It's not obsessivism to not find things funny, CR. I found Space Balls hilarious. Last time I checked it was "laughing at" the Star Wars franchise.

If this man is doing this as humor, he isn't doing a very good job at it, that's for certain.

OK, the Jawa thing was semi-amusing. Ha, ha, ha.
- Ra

Hardy wrote:Well, it's rather obvious that this guy is a movie purist. A lot of the stuff he nitpicks is addressed in canon literature, of which he is clearly ignorant.

You didn't really read the site did you?

Ok, to all the people getting upset over this guy, this quote should leave no doubt as to how the site is intended to be understood:

So, with no research whatsoever, I feel I am in a good position to take a critical look at the next Star Wars movie, four months before its release! Here's what I know so far...

(from the Episode III review page)

Crossroads Inc. wrote:Oh come one! You guys are taking this WAY Too seriously! Lighten up a little and learn to laugh at what you love!

Sure, more then half of all his nitpics are inane, silly, and overly stupid. But that doesn't mean they still can't be funny! It's a sad thing when the fans of something become so obbsessed and so serious about something that they can't laugh at it. That path, leads to the dark side of Fan-ism

Learn to laugh, it's healthy!

Here's a hint, CS: learn to differentiate between things which are intended to be funny and which are actually serious.

This guy is dead serious, for example. He's not trying to be funny, he's just being a dick.