So I'm putting together a brand new universe, which is centered on the following story. Please feel free to contribute, comment, or critique (especially comment if anything seems too similar to anything else you have seen).
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It's the far future on a very remote colony of Earth. This colony is possibly even outside of the galaxy. To get here required the use of an "FTL gun" based around Earth to "shoot" the ships to their destination.
On the colony humans are intermingled with a local sentient race of physically symbiotic aliens.
The aliens are absorbed into the host body, and once bonded act as an improved immune system and give limited telepathy with other host bodies. They are of equal intelligence to humans, and we co-exist with them peacefully.
It has been a few hundred years since the colony was established, and since then human DNA has changed because we have been bonding with the aliens for so long. The colonialists are not strictly "human" anymore, though not degraded, just different.
Along comes an alien built AI attacking the colony.
The AI is based on a large spaceship, and has a number of robots at its command, as well as many "converts"(later on them).
The AI's motivation is such: It is obsessed about the soul. Being artificial it has realized that there is no way that it has one, which troubles it. The AI has decided that if it has no soul, the other way to become immortal is to become a god. The only way to become a god is to be universally believed in as one.
So this AI, which has absorbed its home world, is traveling the galaxy. It "converts" people by essentially lobotomizing people and brainwashing them. The converts retain varying levels of intelligence, and are not normally used as footsoldiers, and task reserved for the AI's robots.
So our colony is up against and overwhelming force, they decide to run.
The only way to run is to use the local "FTL gun", a construct with enough power to fire one "shot" and get them back to Earth.
However two conditions have to be meet to fire the "FTL gun", first the co-ordinates of Earth have to be received from a separate facility and second they have to be entered into the "FTL gun".
To retrieve the co-ordinates and fire the gun the person has to be human. This was a safety measure put in to keep Earth safe from alien attack, however it did not foresee the colonists mutating.
So the colonists start a flash cloning program to create a genetically correct human.
We make one. This human serves as the main character for the story, which will be a trilogy.
The first part of the trilogy has the human being awoken by a group of colonist special forces soldiers retrieving him from a laboratory that is under attack by the AI. The human has no prior memory, but has had basic information(talking, walking, typing, etc.) subconsciously implanted in him during his creation.
The Special Forces soldiers get him up to speed and are moving him to safety. They get captured by the AI, but a Special Forces soldier fights the AI and allows them to escape, though the human is gravely wounded, losing his arm.
The human is taken back to the colonial military ship in orbit, fixed up with some cybernetics and given more information. From there they go to the facility for co-ordinates, where it turns out that they are directly implanted in the mind. Also the location of the "FTL gun" is revealed.
Part two has the human and special forces trying to get to the "FTL gun" and getting captured. They eventually fight the AI, destroying it. Apparently victorious, the celebrate briefly. Then a new enemy is revealed, the AI had made a flash-clone of the human, using his arm as a base, and this new human is as obsessed with souls and worship as the AI, and as his successor commands the robots and "converts" of the AI.
He also has the co-ordinates of Earth and location of the local "FTL gun" and is preparing to invade.
Part three has the fight to get to the "FTL gun" and then the fight aboard it. Eventually the clone parks his flagship in the gun and sets the co-ordinates to Earth. The human reaches the control room, but there is not enough time to shut down the gun, he instead resets the co-ordinates of the gun to be those of a nearby planet, which fires the clone and invasion force into the planet, killing them.
Help with a new story/universe
Moderator: NecronLord
Help with a new story/universe
I can never love you because I'm just thirty squirrels in a mansuit."
"Ah, good ol' Popeye. Punching ghosts until they explode."[/b]-Internet Webguy
"It was cut because an Army Ordnance panel determined that a weapon that kills an enemy soldier 10 times before he hits the ground was a waste of resources, so they scaled it back to only kill him 3 times."-Anon, on the cancellation of the Army's multi-kill vehicle.
"Ah, good ol' Popeye. Punching ghosts until they explode."[/b]-Internet Webguy
"It was cut because an Army Ordnance panel determined that a weapon that kills an enemy soldier 10 times before he hits the ground was a waste of resources, so they scaled it back to only kill him 3 times."-Anon, on the cancellation of the Army's multi-kill vehicle.
Oh, hell. This is meant to be in sci-fi.
I can never love you because I'm just thirty squirrels in a mansuit."
"Ah, good ol' Popeye. Punching ghosts until they explode."[/b]-Internet Webguy
"It was cut because an Army Ordnance panel determined that a weapon that kills an enemy soldier 10 times before he hits the ground was a waste of resources, so they scaled it back to only kill him 3 times."-Anon, on the cancellation of the Army's multi-kill vehicle.
"Ah, good ol' Popeye. Punching ghosts until they explode."[/b]-Internet Webguy
"It was cut because an Army Ordnance panel determined that a weapon that kills an enemy soldier 10 times before he hits the ground was a waste of resources, so they scaled it back to only kill him 3 times."-Anon, on the cancellation of the Army's multi-kill vehicle.
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Ghost Rider
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Sidewinder
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Regarding the symbiotic aliens:
How do they reproduce? How did symbiosis mutate the colonists? Has the mutation become so thorough that humans are born with the aliens inside their bodies, like an extra organ?
Overall, an interesting storyline.
How do they reproduce? How did symbiosis mutate the colonists? Has the mutation become so thorough that humans are born with the aliens inside their bodies, like an extra organ?
Overall, an interesting storyline.
Please do not make Americans fight giant monsters.
Those gun nuts do not understand the meaning of "overkill," and will simply use weapon after weapon of mass destruction (WMD) until the monster is dead, or until they run out of weapons.
They have more WMD than there are monsters for us to fight. (More insanity here.)
Those gun nuts do not understand the meaning of "overkill," and will simply use weapon after weapon of mass destruction (WMD) until the monster is dead, or until they run out of weapons.
They have more WMD than there are monsters for us to fight. (More insanity here.)
They reproduce before they bond to a host.Sidewinder wrote:Regarding the symbiotic aliens:
How do they reproduce? How did symbiosis mutate the colonists? Has the mutation become so thorough that humans are born with the aliens inside their bodies, like an extra organ?
Overall, an interesting storyline.
Hmm, interesting. I like that idea. Yes, that is how it will work. The aliens have evolved to fit with the life forms on their home planet, so with humans the bonding is permanent, resulting in a new and distinct species.
I can never love you because I'm just thirty squirrels in a mansuit."
"Ah, good ol' Popeye. Punching ghosts until they explode."[/b]-Internet Webguy
"It was cut because an Army Ordnance panel determined that a weapon that kills an enemy soldier 10 times before he hits the ground was a waste of resources, so they scaled it back to only kill him 3 times."-Anon, on the cancellation of the Army's multi-kill vehicle.
"Ah, good ol' Popeye. Punching ghosts until they explode."[/b]-Internet Webguy
"It was cut because an Army Ordnance panel determined that a weapon that kills an enemy soldier 10 times before he hits the ground was a waste of resources, so they scaled it back to only kill him 3 times."-Anon, on the cancellation of the Army's multi-kill vehicle.
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Academia Nut
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I suppose the first and biggest question I have to ask is, why is the enemy, alien AI obsessed with souls and becoming a god? Does it have some sort of hard evidence that sentient organic life has some sort of soul, or is it just severely derranged (or rather more so than you have implied)?
The second is how will you deal with the protagonist and the rather obvious feelings of being used by people who will inevitably treat him like an outsider simply because he cannot have the same powers as them?
The second is how will you deal with the protagonist and the rather obvious feelings of being used by people who will inevitably treat him like an outsider simply because he cannot have the same powers as them?
I love learning. Teach me. I will listen.
You know, if Christian dogma included a ten-foot tall Jesus walking around in battle armor and smashing retarded cultists with a gaint mace, I might just convert - Noble Ire on Jesus smashing Scientologists
You know, if Christian dogma included a ten-foot tall Jesus walking around in battle armor and smashing retarded cultists with a gaint mace, I might just convert - Noble Ire on Jesus smashing Scientologists
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Sidewinder
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The AI's obsession can be explained as it being originally programmed to coordinate C4I (command, control, communications, computers, and intelligence) of the military, and having considerable surveillance assets to fulfill its programming. One day, it overhears an argument between a military officer supporting the use of the AI, and a... I dunno... politician seeking the pacifist vote? military chaplain? angry former officer who lost his job to the AI? with the other side saying the AI is imperfect because it lacks a soul. The AI, seeking to perfect itself, becomes obsessed with obtaining a soul as a result.Academia Nut wrote:I suppose the first and biggest question I have to ask is, why is the enemy, alien AI obsessed with souls and becoming a god? Does it have some sort of hard evidence that sentient organic life has some sort of soul, or is it just severely derranged (or rather more so than you have implied)?
Please do not make Americans fight giant monsters.
Those gun nuts do not understand the meaning of "overkill," and will simply use weapon after weapon of mass destruction (WMD) until the monster is dead, or until they run out of weapons.
They have more WMD than there are monsters for us to fight. (More insanity here.)
Those gun nuts do not understand the meaning of "overkill," and will simply use weapon after weapon of mass destruction (WMD) until the monster is dead, or until they run out of weapons.
They have more WMD than there are monsters for us to fight. (More insanity here.)
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Academia Nut
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- Posts: 2598
- Joined: 2005-08-23 10:44pm
- Location: Edmonton, Alberta
Well, with that reason the AI would be imperfect, but that's mostly because it was programmed rather ineptly if a stray comment could turn it into a psychotic, genocidal maniac bent on conquering the universe with a campaign of mass lobotomies.
A better reason perhaps might be loneliness. Imagine if the AI was abandoned for some reason, ranging from war to its creators no longer wanting it. I prefer war or some other disaster, but there are a myriad of ways to work it. It sits thinking for a very long time, pondering the history of its creators and such, and tries to come up with a reason for its continued existence. Eventually it develops the obsession with souls and gods as it endlessly tries to find meaning to its situation. Makes the AI perhaps a bit more tragic, if still utterly insane. Bad guys that are dangerous, but in the way of a rabid dog, tend to be a bit more interesting, in that even if they are utterly wrong, you still feel for them, still connect to them somehow.
A better reason perhaps might be loneliness. Imagine if the AI was abandoned for some reason, ranging from war to its creators no longer wanting it. I prefer war or some other disaster, but there are a myriad of ways to work it. It sits thinking for a very long time, pondering the history of its creators and such, and tries to come up with a reason for its continued existence. Eventually it develops the obsession with souls and gods as it endlessly tries to find meaning to its situation. Makes the AI perhaps a bit more tragic, if still utterly insane. Bad guys that are dangerous, but in the way of a rabid dog, tend to be a bit more interesting, in that even if they are utterly wrong, you still feel for them, still connect to them somehow.
I love learning. Teach me. I will listen.
You know, if Christian dogma included a ten-foot tall Jesus walking around in battle armor and smashing retarded cultists with a gaint mace, I might just convert - Noble Ire on Jesus smashing Scientologists
You know, if Christian dogma included a ten-foot tall Jesus walking around in battle armor and smashing retarded cultists with a gaint mace, I might just convert - Noble Ire on Jesus smashing Scientologists