How would you re-cast Stargate SG-1?

[Metahive]

Right, Jack in the movie was the one written with just one "l". Hey I would totally believe that the two were unrelated and just coincidentally had the exact same backstory...maybe a result of one of those Ancient reality warping devices that litter the SG universe.

[Eternal_Freedom]

I just inerpreted it as his snarkiness being (at first) weariness with the whole thing. He lost his son, went on that first mission, then his wife left him and he retired. He's dragged back in fairly unwillingly. I figured his snarkiness was a coping mechanism and/or a result of losing his son. It made sense to me and it made for a much more interesting portrayal than Mr Serious would have been.

Then again, Mr Serious worked in the film because his son had only very recently died, so him being emotionally dead and suicidal was believable.

[Replicant]

Yeah, once. I can't see him committing to a long-term role as a USAF officer. Unless of course you change the role so it's a Marine Corps officer. Plus, I can't see him playing an officer long term (yes I know he was a USAF Colonle in the Simpsons once).

tbh I couldn't see R. Lee Ermy as a flag officer, field commander sure, but I just can't see him being able to play someone capable of handling the administrive or political side of being a general, regardless of the branch of service.

R. Lee Ermy cannot play anything that does not require him to bellow at the top of his lungs like he is being sodomized by a baseball bat. I hate that guy.

[Eternal_Freedom]

Yeah, once. I can't see him committing to a long-term role as a USAF officer. Unless of course you change the role so it's a Marine Corps officer. Plus, I can't see him playing an officer long term (yes I know he was a USAF Colonle in the Simpsons once).

tbh I couldn't see R. Lee Ermy as a flag officer, field commander sure, but I just can't see him being able to play someone capable of handling the administrive or political side of being a general, regardless of the branch of service.

R. Lee Ermy cannot play anything that does not require him to bellow at the top of his lungs like he is being sodomized by a baseball bat. I hate that guy.

Well since he was a sergeant and only later became an actor (almost accidentally during the filming for Full Metal Jacket) and he's only done a few roles that I can name, it's understandable. Directors cast him as Drill Sergeant Nasty, because he was one, not because he can act like one on screen.

[Replicant]

I just inerpreted it as his snarkiness being (at first) weariness with the whole thing. He lost his son, went on that first mission, then his wife left him and he retired. He's dragged back in fairly unwillingly. I figured his snarkiness was a coping mechanism and/or a result of losing his son. It made sense to me and it made for a much more interesting portrayal than Mr Serious would have been.

Then again, Mr Serious worked in the film because his son had only very recently died, so him being emotionally dead and suicidal was believable.

The whole reason he was selected for the mission in the movie was they wanted someone that would have no problem using the nuke they gave him to eliminate the threat on the other side. They just didn't expect Jack to meet families and children on the other side that helped him regain his humanity.

[Replicant]

Well since he was a sergeant and only later became an actor (almost accidentally during the filming for Full Metal Jacket) and he's only done a few roles that I can name, it's understandable. Directors cast him as Drill Sergeant Nasty, because he was one, not because he can act like one on screen.

But is has become his universal schtick. Even when he did that show on the History Channel (or was it Discovery) where he would teach you weapon porn he would do it using that bellow voice.

[Metahive]

You mean Lock'n Load? I was actually creeped out by the fact that he wasn't shoting and cussing the whole time there. The Pod People must have gotten a grip on him!

[Eternal_Freedom]

That's called being typecast. It happens, especially if (as I said) you aren't originally an actor but become one much later by chance.

[Purple]

Come to think of it. There has to be a way to cast Hasselhoff in a role. Maybe as what ever the grand villain on that show was. (I only watched about a dozen episodes total, and from a mix of different series so I don't know that much about the show.)

[Metahive]

Kree, Purple! Kek kel shak!

[Purple]

Kree, Purple! Kek kel shak!

Basically. You could replace half of the crew with people from Baywatch. In fact, do that. Let's go all 90's on this.

Have Jack be played by Hulk Hogan.
The male guy with the glasses (Daniel right) can be Chris Lemmon. He plaid Hulks partner in the Thunder in Paradise series.
The female can be Pam.
And we can cast Hasselhoff as Tilk.

[Borgholio]

Blasphemer, your entrails shall be sacrificed at the shrine of St. Mac Guyver by midnight!

That being said I'm glad they didn't go with Mr.Joyless for the series. Snarky O'Neil was simply more fun to watch for me.

Hey I'm not saying that Mr. Joyless should have been for the entire 7 year run here. It just seemed like a sudden shift from the O'Neill in the movie to the O'Neill in the show. Had it developed over a season or two then I would not have had a problem with it, since it could be explained as him getting back to "normal". It just seemed sudden to me the way they did it, that's all.

[Darth Nostril]

I've got a better idea, a reality tv show where illiterate morons like purple are beaten to death with blunt sticks in front of a live studio audience.

[Purple]

I've got a better idea, a reality tv show where illiterate morons like purple are beaten to death with blunt sticks in front of a live studio audience.

I am serious. If I could redo the series from scratch and cast new members that is who I would cast. It would be nice to see the oldies in new roles, as old as they are to bring in a bit of 90's flare. I mean sure, they ain't what they used to be. But it's still them.

[Eternal_Freedom]

Blasphemer, your entrails shall be sacrificed at the shrine of St. Mac Guyver by midnight!

That being said I'm glad they didn't go with Mr.Joyless for the series. Snarky O'Neil was simply more fun to watch for me.

Hey I'm not saying that Mr. Joyless should have been for the entire 7 year run here. It just seemed like a sudden shift from the O'Neill in the movie to the O'Neill in the show. Had it developed over a season or two then I would not have had a problem with it, since it could be explained as him getting back to "normal". It just seemed sudden to me the way they did it, that's all.

As I said earlier, the series began about a year after the film happened, during which Jack's wife left and he retired and took up stargazing. I assumed that his snarkiness was his way of coping with all that crazy shit.

Or, that he felt better because he'd bonded with Skaa'ra and knew he was still alive on Abydos which made him feel better.

Or, he'd just reached a point where he stopped feeling miserable and just...didn't care anymore. He never seems to balk at risky or possibly suicidal missions, after all.

[Shinn Langley Soryu]

Jeffrey Donovan as Jack, Gabrielle Anwar as Samantha, and Coby Bell as Teal'c. Dunno where Bruce Campbell will fit in, though.

[Borgholio]

Dunno where Bruce Campbell will fit in, though.

Ba'al?

[Metahive]

Basically. You could replace half of the crew with people from Baywatch. In fact, do that. Let's go all 90's on this.

Have Jack be played by Hulk Hogan.
The male guy with the glasses (Daniel right) can be Chris Lemmon. He plaid Hulks partner in the Thunder in Paradise series.
The female can be Pam.
And we can cast Hasselhoff as Tilk.

Your list of crimes and offenses against everything that is good and decent increases by the minute! Avast, I say thee!

Hey I'm not saying that Mr. Joyless should have been for the entire 7 year run here. It just seemed like a sudden shift from the O'Neill in the movie to the O'Neill in the show. Had it developed over a season or two then I would not have had a problem with it, since it could be explained as him getting back to "normal". It just seemed sudden to me the way they did it, that's all.

Even if we ignore Eternal_Freedom's explanation, if the change is for the better why complain about it? The change I would find more noteworthy would be all non-Earth humans suddenly being able to speak English fluently when them not doing so was a pretty big plot point in the movie. Yeah, it's more convenient for the writers, but still chuckleworthy to think that one language of a planet they didn't even have contact with for about 5000 years is practically the galactic lingua franca and even more widespread than Goa'uld Speak.

[Nephtys]

As much as I liked SG-1, it had serious flaws. Even beyond the main 'campy episode of the week / oh no the goa'uld are up to it again!' sort of flair it had. Namely, that despite being a slightly not-that-serious X-COM-meets-dr-who-trek modern/space adventure, it became just unglued in what it wanted to do, and left so many plot points die horribly instead of creating any real sensible continuity.

Every single civilization the team meets, befriends or saves (or dooms) pretty much is wiped out or never mentioned again the instant it writes their CURRENT storyline into the corner. Every body's dead! Those space romans with fancy tech? Bombed out. The sinister Aschen? Sorta-retconned. Or killed. Or something, who cares. The Asgard? Dead for no reason. Ancients? Dumber by the moment. The Tok'ra? Yeah, let's totally write them out the instant we can't come up with an idea...

There was so very little long-term planning in the show's storyline, that it's only story advancement pretty much comes at the two-parters and the occasional episode that references one prior. That's one thing I suppose I could give credit to Atlantis: The story actually stuck. Until you know, the Ancient-Replicators became the focus of every episode, and the threat of the Wraith was sooooo overblown for how shitty they were.

[Crazedwraith]

Yeah you know what? That's not that much of a bad thing to me. Everything you've said is right, Nephtys, but I liked it when SG-1 was sillish planet of the week escapades. That's when it was at its best. SG-1 shouldn't have to be B5 with all its arcs planned out 5 years in advance. Episodic fun is plenty good in its own right.

(arguably the most successful TV SciFi franchise of all time, SGU notwithstanding)

Ha. Go on argue. More successful than say Star Trek? or Doctor Who? No.


As to O'Neill, you can see at the end of the theatrical movie he's getting a tad more lighthearted. With the quips and friendlyness with Jackson. RDa accelerated the process but he's still relatively subdued in the first few episodes and they did the whole 'Cold Lazarus' episode for O'Neill to gt over his son's death a bit to justify it. Still RDA got goofier and goofier as the show went on the character got flanderised.

[Steve]

Eh, I think a point was made that it took the events of the movie to turn Russell O'Neill into RDA O'Neill, as he recovered somewhat from the death of his son.

Granted, it's probably just going to be a matter of personal taste on which version of Jack people like more, with RDA having a major unfair advantage of vastly more screen time.

[Simon_Jester]

Ok, let me clarify. In my personal opinion, Stargate (and please lets keep in mind I did watch and have done so again all seasons of this show) was a poor tv-show, since I believe it could have been written and portrayed sooo much better. But again, in my personal opinion, it wasn't as good as it could have been.

I think that if you approached SG-1 determined to "do it right this time," you'd probably wind up screwing up a lot of the things that made it good. Granted, you might also screw back down some of the things that were screwed up the first time, it might cancel out, but...

Really, if it were easy or even possible to make drastically better television SF than Stargate SG-1, then there would be numerous examples of such shows, instead of only a few. You yourself have only managed to name two shows from the golden age of television SF (1990-2005 or so) that manage to outdo it.

So it'd be damn hard to do a better job, I suspect.

Yeah, which is why, in the early series at least, SG-3 were all Marines.

You're right though. I always wondered why they didn't whistle up the Seals or Delta Force or whomever. Or, hell, in later seasons when they had the whole international cooperation stuff going on, borrow some SAS guys or similar.

Then again, it's made quite clear in numerous episodes that Jack is not a typical USAF Colonel, since most of his career was in special forces (he says as much in the very first episode, some joke about how if he ever wrote a book about his career, he'd have to shoot anyone that actually read it).

The Air Force has a small number of commandos of its own (Special Tactics, I believe they're called). Also, the Stargate program was born as an Air Force program, the Air Force probably wanted to retain control of the program for bureaucratic reasons- and having all the Stargate teams consist of non-Air Force personnel would undermine their influence over the program.

So the other SG-# teams are built up in parallel with SG-1, including personnel drawn from other services, but SG-1 itself is not replaced, especially since it's got a good track record.

Um-the SGC uses Marines all the time when they need more firepower and warm bodies and since the Marine Corps is a lot bigger than the special forces community, I suspect a Marine platoon or three being incommunicado for a week or seven would draw a lot less attention than one of the special forces units. The SGC is a secret operation even within the US military.

I would expect them to draw from the special forces component of the Marine Corps. Yes, each branch of the US armed forces has its own commando teams. It's kind of silly, honestly.

And since special forces units routinely do things that are highly classified, including long-duration missions behind enemy lines, any special forces unit would fit the bill of "can disappear off the radar for a couple of months."

First one to see the painfully obvious flaw with this gets a positively indigestible cookie because I baked it myself.

Do I get the cookie?

Well since he was a sergeant and only later became an actor (almost accidentally during the filming for Full Metal Jacket) and he's only done a few roles that I can name, it's understandable. Directors cast him as Drill Sergeant Nasty, because he was one, not because he can act like one on screen.

But is has become his universal schtick. Even when he did that show on the History Channel (or was it Discovery) where he would teach you weapon porn he would do it using that bellow voice.

You mean Lock'n Load? I was actually creeped out by the fact that he wasn't shoting and cussing the whole time there. The Pod People must have gotten a grip on him!

OK. First thing to establish: R. Lee Ermey plays R. Lee Ermey on TV. He has zero acting ability, or at least no acting ability is in evidence.

Now, let's look at how R. Lee Ermey reacts to new situations. He is a drill sergeant. His responsibility is to educate new Marines (always Marines) in the art of war, and to batter them into submission if they act in a manner unbecoming of new Marines.

If something pisses him off, he shouts and curses at it until it curls up into a ball and begs for mercy. That's his "batter them into submission" function.

If nothing has pissed him off (say, because he's playing with machine guns or getting into a tank drag race), then he speaks in a relatively normal tone and cadence. That's his "educate new Marines" function.

So both of these are functional roles and a natural part of his character basic personality.

Even if we ignore Eternal_Freedom's explanation, if the change is for the better why complain about it? The change I would find more noteworthy would be all non-Earth humans suddenly being able to speak English fluently when them not doing so was a pretty big plot point in the movie. Yeah, it's more convenient for the writers, but still chuckleworthy to think that one language of a planet they didn't even have contact with for about 5000 years is practically the galactic lingua franca and even more widespread than Goa'uld Speak.

Yeah. Logically you'd expect all the non-Earth humans to speak languages derivative from Goa'uld-ese. Daniel speaks it fluently and can translate very effectively, so it's a good thing they pick him up from Abydos in the first episode.

Teal'c, of course, would speak nothing else at first.

Jack picked up some rudimentary Goa'uld-ese on Abydos but could barely make himself understood as I recall.

Samantha Carter is new to the team but highly intelligent; she'd have made a careful study of whatever published material Daniel made on Goa'uld-ese before the Stargate was closed off.

So you'd have a situation where Daniel Jackson can practically write thesis dissertations in the languages spoken by non-Earth humans, because they're mostly quite close to Goa'uld, and making himself understood is no more of an obstacle than communicating from Spanish to Italian. Carter can manage, despite a lack of practical experience, as a way of establishing her intellectual equality with Daniel.

O'Neill can make himself hilariously misunderstood; Teal'c has the opposite problem with communicating in English, which probably helps explain why he's so stern-and-silent.

After a season or two, all this fades away because everyone on the team is fully fluent in both English and the basic Goa'uld mother language, and translation issues become minimal, or only arise when contacting cultures that have no interaction history with the Goa'uld.

The real problem is that you'd need to have half the dialogue for the show in Goa'uld, which means either making up a constructed language and using subtitles all the time, or having some special way to indicate when the characters are speaking in Goa'uld while allowing them to talk in English to be understandable to the audience.

[Batman]

Yep. Here's your cookie.
The 'disappear for months' thing of course works for any SpecOps unit.

[Crazedwraith]

Speaking of the canonical marine teams. I wonder what their cover story for working in Cheyenne Mountain was? O'Neill and Carter were supposed to be deep space radar people but that was barely plausible for them. Let alone Marines.

[Batman]

Was it ever actually specified that they were assigned to Cheyenne Mountain? Carter was deep space radar, I don't remember what their cover for O'Neill was, and I don't think they ever mentioned where the paper pushers officially parked them.
Mind you I hardly completely remember 15 seasons worth of SG so feel free to correct me.