Yogi reviews The Two Towers (Spoilers)

Yogi · Post by **Yogi** » 2002-12-18 07:11pm

The Two Towers was, frankly, a bit of a dissapointment. It has many of the same flaws as The Fellowship of the Ring which I find rather annoying. As other review sites will no doubt wax heavily on it's merits, I will outline some things I found to be lacking in this movie. Note, it's been some time since I've read the book, so my memory is a bit spotty.

#1) Showing things that should not be shown.
Some things, I beleive, are better left to the imagination. The The Fellowship of the Ring, they showed Sauron is his bas-@$$ black armor. This time, they decided to show the fight between Gandalf and the Balrog. It was very well done, but still I beleive it should best be left to the imagination.

#2) Will Save: -1
Frodo has willpower in spades, way beyong normal men. However, you will never guess it by watching the movie. Frodo is constantly falling under the spell of the ring, and needing someone else to snap him out of it. Since his willpower is what makes him so heroic, his character has been pussified beyond beleif. Samwise, Merry, and Pippen were protrayed to be more heroic than Frodo.

#3) Spot Check: -20
Say you're the King od the Nazgul. You're searching for the One Ring of Power, and in your search you fly in front of someone who is twenty feet away, holding it out in front of him. Suddenly, the two of you are seperated by a Plot Device. Do you think you'll decide to investigate the situation furthur? Not this one. Did he not see it, or is his intellegence rather lacking?

#4) Boromir v2.0
Evidently Boromir was liked to much that they decided to give Faramir the exact same personality as he did. He decided to take both the Hobbits to Gondor in order to use the Ring! I don't remember that happening in the book, and it's what also set up the Spot Check -20 scenario above. Note to Peter Jackson. J.R.R. Tolken >>>>> YU0. Let's not screw with his characters, shall we?

#5) Gimli as comic releif
Gimli is not supposed to be comic releif. He's supposed to kick a lot of ass.

#6) Oh no! Aragon just fell of a cliff! He must be dead, right?
Considering there are scenes in the preview he's in that he hasn't been yet, no. WHY, oh why, was that section added in? How do you spell "Stupid Scene"? U-N-E-C-E-S-S-A-R-Y

#7) The Olympic Torch!
Saruman made some nice bombs which have just been planted at the base of the tower. If you were the orcs would you...
a) Carry a torch with you so you can light the bombs right away
b) Have one of the many torches that they were carrying around tossed in
c) Have someone run in a normal torch just for this purpose
d) Have someone run in a special giant glowing white sparkly smoky torch that looks like the Olymic Torch and lights up your path so everyone can see you.

#8) Olympic Torch + Spot Check -20
Let's say you're a bunch of humans and elves defending the fortress. Suddenly, some orc carrying a special giant glowing white sparkly smoky torch that looks like the Olymic Torch comes running to your walls. Do you...
a) Shoot him
b) Feather him with arrows
c) Fucking shoot the guy already, geez are you blind!?
d) Everyone ignore him, until Aragon point out some guy carrying a special giant glowing white sparkly smoky torch that looks like the Olymic Torch is running towards the walls, and that may be BAD. When he does point it out, only Legolas shoots at him, in which case it's too little too late.

#9) The Chopping Block.
Not only did The Two Towers get things chopped off the beginning of it, the Helm's Deep story arc ends with the winning of the battle of Helm's Deep, and the Ents re-landscaping Saruman's yard and the Frodo story arc ends with Gollum plotting to send them to Shelob. Ouch, that's a lot of cuts.

#10) The Additions.
Various additions to the film that wasn't in the book, all of them to try to make things more tense and deamatic. Comes out as overdone, and around as subtile as a Genesis Device. Character Development is a thing that should be explored more, especially for Gimli.

#11) Looking pretty.
This movie had uber-1337 special effects. Unfortunatly, the style over substance curse that has struck down George Lucas has apparently taken hold of Peter Jackson.

Well, that's the bad parts. Everything else was done really well. Read the other reviews to know what they did right.

kheegster · Post by **kheegster** » 2002-12-18 07:21pm

I agree with it mostly...I came out with a bad taste in my mouth and thinking "that's it???"

KG

Exonerate · Post by **Exonerate** » 2002-12-18 07:21pm

I just saw it today too... One thing I didn't like was that there was too much female fanserice. I mean (SPOILERS!) Legolas first somehow swings onto a horse that's about to ram him from before, surf a shield down a staircase shooting arrows along the way, and make a ladder fall by shooting it with his arrow. Also, the part where Gandalf come with the reinforcements is kinda disappointing. I kinda expected him to do some magic ass-kicking, but then he just leads the reinforcements into battle... I'd have to agree with Yogi about character development for Gimli though. Smeagol was pretty entertaining.

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2002-12-18 07:24pm

IIRC, Gandalf really doesn't use that much magic in the book*.

You have to remember that Tolkien's idea of magic is also not like it is in D&D...

*and by book, I mean the entire LOTR.

Post by **Colonel Olrik** » 2002-12-18 07:28pm

Spanky The Dolphin wrote:IIRC, Gandalf really doesn't use that much magic in the book*.

You have to remember that Tolkien's idea of magic is also not like it is in D&D...

*and by book, I mean the entire LOTR.

Gandalf fights with his sword. He uses his powers to encourage and rally the people during the fighting and before. As far as I can remember, he only uses magic in actual fighting when going against equally powerful beings (Saruman, the Balrog)

Yogi · Post by **Yogi** » 2002-12-18 07:31pm

The power of the SFX side is seductive. It offers great power, but will eventually lead you on the path to dectruction of character and plot. And so, Peter Jackson joins George Lucas in caressing their digital effects computers and whispering "My Preeeeescious"

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2002-12-18 07:47pm

Yogi wrote:The power of the SFX side is seductive. It offers great power, but will eventually lead you on the path to dectruction of character and plot. And so, Peter Jackson joins George Lucas in caressing their digital effects computers and whispering "My Preeeeescious"

Slip slidin' down the slippery slope...

How exactly was plot and character development sacrificed in TTT for CG and special effects? If anything the reverse is true; Gollum, a CG character had the most character development of anyone!

And good lord, people, ya'll are getting dangerously close to sounding like AICN talkbackers. You'd think Peter Jackson slapped long ears on Gimli and gave him a quasi-Jamaican sounding accent.

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2002-12-18 07:48pm

Exonerate wrote:I just saw it today too... One thing I didn't like was that there was too much female fanserice. I mean (SPOILERS!) Legolas first somehow swings onto a horse that's about to ram him from before, surf a shield down a staircase shooting arrows along the way, and make a ladder fall by shooting it with his arrow. Also, the part where Gandalf come with the reinforcements is kinda disappointing. I kinda expected him to do some magic ass-kicking, but then he just leads the reinforcements into battle... I'd have to agree with Yogi about character development for Gimli though. Smeagol was pretty entertaining.

No male fanservice? No Eowyn on Arwen action?

Howedar · Post by **Howedar** » 2002-12-18 07:56pm

I have to agree with all of this. In addition, I have to comment that the tunnel under the wall of Helm's Deep was laughable. Why the friggin hell wouldn't you put the grill on the very outside, or have multiple grills, or both? For crying out loud, don't those dumbass Rohanians know that enemies under your walls is a bad thing?!?!

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2002-12-18 07:58pm

It's Rohirrim.

[Fixed spelling. ~Crayz9000]

Thanks.

Howedar · Post by **Howedar** » 2002-12-18 07:58pm

Whatever.

kheegster · Post by **kheegster** » 2002-12-18 08:09pm

And why do they have to wait for the Uruk Hai to get nice and close before letting lose with the arrows? They should have been peppering them the moment they were in range (hurrah to the old man!)

KG

tharkûn · Post by **tharkûn** » 2002-12-18 08:22pm

And why do they have to wait for the Uruk Hai to get nice and close before letting lose with the arrows? They should have been peppering them the moment they were in range (hurrah to the old man!)
Because in the book, unlike the movie with elvish reinforcements, they are short on arrows. Firing at long range is a good way to waste arrows.

It's the whites of their eyes type situation.

CmdrWilkens · Post by **CmdrWilkens** » 2002-12-18 10:23pm

Exonerate wrote:I just saw it today too... One thing I didn't like was that there was too much female fanserice. I mean (SPOILERS!) Legolas first somehow swings onto a horse that's about to ram him from before, surf a shield down a staircase shooting arrows along the way, and make a ladder fall by shooting it with his arrow. Also, the part where Gandalf come with the reinforcements is kinda disappointing. I kinda expected him to do some magic ass-kicking, but then he just leads the reinforcements into battle... I'd have to agree with Yogi about character development for Gimli though. Smeagol was pretty entertaining.

Just a minor note on Gandalf's appearence at Helm's Deep is actually one of the things I liked because its exactly like it happened in the book (with the exception that Erkenbrand(sp?) not Eomer led the reinforcements).

Exonerate · Post by **Exonerate** » 2002-12-18 11:10pm

neoolong wrote:
Exonerate wrote:I just saw it today too... One thing I didn't like was that there was too much female fanserice. I mean (SPOILERS!) Legolas first somehow swings onto a horse that's about to ram him from before, surf a shield down a staircase shooting arrows along the way, and make a ladder fall by shooting it with his arrow. Also, the part where Gandalf come with the reinforcements is kinda disappointing. I kinda expected him to do some magic ass-kicking, but then he just leads the reinforcements into battle... I'd have to agree with Yogi about character development for Gimli though. Smeagol was pretty entertaining.
No male fanservice? No Eowyn on Arwen action?

There's only one incident where I remember, and that's when there's a close up shot of Arwen with Aragorn, and camera just happens to zoom in on them, and her breasts are in view (As in they take up about 1/6 of the screen)

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2002-12-18 11:12pm

Exonerate wrote:
neoolong wrote:No male fanservice? No Eowyn on Arwen action?
There's only one incident where I remember, and that's when there's a close up shot of Arwen with Aragorn, and camera just happens to zoom in on them, and her breasts are in view (As in they take up about 1/6 of the screen)

But I want some Eowyn on Arwen action. Gosh darn it.

But I'll take what I can get.

Enforcer Talen · Post by **Enforcer Talen** » 2002-12-20 12:55am

Yogi wrote:The Two Towers was, frankly, a bit of a dissapointment. It has many of the same flaws as The Fellowship of the Ring which I find rather annoying. As other review sites will no doubt wax heavily on it's merits, I will outline some things I found to be lacking in this movie. Note, it's been some time since I've read the book, so my memory is a bit spotty.

#1) Showing things that should not be shown.
Some things, I beleive, are better left to the imagination. The The Fellowship of the Ring, they showed Sauron is his bas-@$$ black armor. This time, they decided to show the fight between Gandalf and the Balrog. It was very well done, but still I beleive it should best be left to the imagination.

#2) Will Save: -1
Frodo has willpower in spades, way beyong normal men. However, you will never guess it by watching the movie. Frodo is constantly falling under the spell of the ring, and needing someone else to snap him out of it. Since his willpower is what makes him so heroic, his character has been pussified beyond beleif. Samwise, Merry, and Pippen were protrayed to be more heroic than Frodo.

#3) Spot Check: -20
Say you're the King od the Nazgul. You're searching for the One Ring of Power, and in your search you fly in front of someone who is twenty feet away, holding it out in front of him. Suddenly, the two of you are seperated by a Plot Device. Do you think you'll decide to investigate the situation furthur? Not this one. Did he not see it, or is his intellegence rather lacking?

#4) Boromir v2.0
Evidently Boromir was liked to much that they decided to give Faramir the exact same personality as he did. He decided to take both the Hobbits to Gondor in order to use the Ring! I don't remember that happening in the book, and it's what also set up the Spot Check -20 scenario above. Note to Peter Jackson. J.R.R. Tolken >>>>> YU0. Let's not screw with his characters, shall we?

#5) Gimli as comic releif
Gimli is not supposed to be comic releif. He's supposed to kick a lot of ass.

#6) Oh no! Aragon just fell of a cliff! He must be dead, right?
Considering there are scenes in the preview he's in that he hasn't been yet, no. WHY, oh why, was that section added in? How do you spell "Stupid Scene"? U-N-E-C-E-S-S-A-R-Y

#7) The Olympic Torch!
Saruman made some nice bombs which have just been planted at the base of the tower. If you were the orcs would you...
a) Carry a torch with you so you can light the bombs right away
b) Have one of the many torches that they were carrying around tossed in
c) Have someone run in a normal torch just for this purpose
d) Have someone run in a special giant glowing white sparkly smoky torch that looks like the Olymic Torch and lights up your path so everyone can see you.

#8) Olympic Torch + Spot Check -20
Let's say you're a bunch of humans and elves defending the fortress. Suddenly, some orc carrying a special giant glowing white sparkly smoky torch that looks like the Olymic Torch comes running to your walls. Do you...
a) Shoot him
b) Feather him with arrows
c) Fucking shoot the guy already, geez are you blind!?
d) Everyone ignore him, until Aragon point out some guy carrying a special giant glowing white sparkly smoky torch that looks like the Olymic Torch is running towards the walls, and that may be BAD. When he does point it out, only Legolas shoots at him, in which case it's too little too late.

#9) The Chopping Block.
Not only did The Two Towers get things chopped off the beginning of it, the Helm's Deep story arc ends with the winning of the battle of Helm's Deep, and the Ents re-landscaping Saruman's yard and the Frodo story arc ends with Gollum plotting to send them to Shelob. Ouch, that's a lot of cuts.

#10) The Additions.
Various additions to the film that wasn't in the book, all of them to try to make things more tense and deamatic. Comes out as overdone, and around as subtile as a Genesis Device. Character Development is a thing that should be explored more, especially for Gimli.

#11) Looking pretty.
This movie had uber-1337 special effects. Unfortunatly, the style over substance curse that has struck down George Lucas has apparently taken hold of Peter Jackson.

Well, that's the bad parts. Everything else was done really well. Read the other reviews to know what they did right.

that reflects most of my rant, as well. superb graphics. eye candy galore. gollum is so cool. gimli amuses. aragon and his yet another death bores. faramir acting totally out of character. and the no 1 reason why i didnt like the movie.

elves rescued helm's deep.

I mean, where the hell were they are in the books? fighting off their own invasions, I thought. nah, 2k elves are available

and the ents - while not minding the pippin persuasion that much, I really dislike how they didnt do their role and kill 8k orcs. thats one of the coolest surprises in the books.

and, damn, but I was looking foward to shelob.

Enforcer Talen · Post by **Enforcer Talen** » 2002-12-20 12:56am

oh, and bits to look for - when the hobbits are carried by ents, one of them is wearing a hiking boot.

when one of the orcs is thrown off a ladder, when it's zoomed out slightly, orc armies on the left side of the screen, he growls kowabunga as he falls. good stuff.

StarDestroyer.Net BBS

Yogi reviews The Two Towers (Spoilers)

Yogi reviews The Two Towers (Spoilers)

Re: Yogi reviews The Two Towers (Spoilers)