Canada

[fgalkin]

To those of you who haven't noticed, I was gone for the last 6 days. I have been on a 6-day tour of Canada. At its conclusion, I can say one thing: Canada rox!

Having visited the Niagara falls, Toronto, Ottawa, Montreal, and Quebec City, I can make the following list:

Things that rocked:
1) The Canadian part of the Niagara Falls. It makes the American one look, well, puny.

2) Toronto. A really nice city. I'd love to live there.

3) The CN Tower: the talest freestanding structure in the world. 14 meters taller than the Ostankino Tower in Moscow.

4) Ottawa: why can't America have a light show on the walls of the Capitol?

5) Montreal: good city, despite being mostly French.

6) Canadien bookstores. I've been able to buy The Player of Games and The Use of Weapons, both of which are out of print in the USA.

Things that sucked:

1) Fundies. In Niagara Falls, Ontario, I've been handed a Chick cartoon 5 minutes after I left the hotel.

2) Homeless bums. What's up with that. I know that Canada has economic problems, but, hey, isn't that a bit extreme?

3) Best Western Hotel Jacques Cartier in Hull, Quebec. I hope that place collapses. I mean fucking prisons have bigger cells than the so-called "rooms" of that hotel.

4) The Montreal Grenadiers. Seeing people in British uniforms speaking FRENCH was extremely dperessing.

That's all for now. Pics are coming soon.

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

[Laird]

You were gone?

Anyways..glad you enjoyed the trip....I guess?

[fgalkin]

You were gone?

Anyways..glad you enjoyed the trip....I guess?

Seeing your posting pattern, I wouldn't have expected you to notice.

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

[Enigma]

<snip>
4) Ottawa: why can't America have a light show on the walls of the Capitol?
<snip>

How long were you in Ottawa? You've been in my city but didn't tell me?

[RedImperator]

Toronto badly needs to Guiliani its panhandlers. They're all over the place. I crossed the street against the light to get away from one who wanted my cigarettes and was making me late for the Blue Jays game.

And ask Mike about the one who came up with the innovative panhandling technique of blocking Younge Street and not moving until people gave him money. This failed when the drivers realized there was another lane, and, also, they wouldn't feel guilty if they ran him over.

[fgalkin]

<snip>
4) Ottawa: why can't America have a light show on the walls of the Capitol?
<snip>

How long were you in Ottawa? You've been in my city but didn't tell me?

A whopping 4.5 hours spread across 2 days. Day 1: a sightseeing tour+ the show. Day 2: a tour of the Parliament+ the guard parade thing + visit to the National Gallery (i went to the War Museum instead)+ lunch.

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

[J]

2) Toronto. A really nice city. I'd love to live there.

Awww...and you didn't drop me a note or something? I would've given you a nice hug and a mini-tour around town.

3) The CN Tower: the talest freestanding structure in the world. 14 meters taller than the Ostankino Tower in Moscow.

Pretty impressive isn't it. Did you get to eat in the rotating restaurant and stand on the glass floor?

4) Ottawa: why can't America have a light show on the walls of the Capitol?

Because we're special!

[Enigma]

<snip>

4) Ottawa: why can't America have a light show on the walls of the Capitol?

Because we're special!

I'm going to beat you or aerius to the punch.

It's because the Americans touch themselves at night.

[fgalkin]

2) Toronto. A really nice city. I'd love to live there.

Awww...and you didn't drop me a note or something? I would've given you a nice hug and a mini-tour around town.

There wouldn't have been time. We've only got about 2 hours free time/

3) The CN Tower: the talest freestanding structure in the world. 14 meters taller than the Ostankino Tower in Moscow.

Pretty impressive isn't it. Did you get to eat in the rotating restaurant and stand on the glass floor?

I stood on the glass floor. I do, however, worry about the fate of your tower. I have been on two observation decks before. None of them exist any longer (one has been in Ostankino, thae second one was the WTC). I wouldn't want anything to happen to the CN Tower.

4) Ottawa: why can't America have a light show on the walls of the Capitol?

Because we're special!

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

[The Duchess of Zeon]

Toronto badly needs to Guiliani its panhandlers. They're all over the place. I crossed the street against the light to get away from one who wanted my cigarettes and was making me late for the Blue Jays game.

And ask Mike about the one who came up with the innovative panhandling technique of blocking Younge Street and not moving until people gave him money. This failed when the drivers realized there was another lane, and, also, they wouldn't feel guilty if they ran him over.

Just have the mounted police (the cavalry cops, not mounties) ride through after dusk and use polo sticks to beat up anyone sleeping in the parks. If any civil liberties groups complain, say "it's better than Russia!"

[Mark S]

Glad to hear you had so much fun. If you didn't stay in at least one shitty hotel and get bugged on the streey it wouldn't be an advanture. Now you just need to see the seventy percent of the country.

[Lagmonster]

You went to the war museum? In OTTAWA? We have way the hell better museums here than that tiny thing. It's the one I keep making apologies for to visiting friends and family.

As an odd coincidence, they're busy building a new, improved war museum on the other side of the hill, but it's only half-built.

[Lagmonster]

Fundies. In Niagara Falls, Ontario, I've been handed a Chick cartoon 5 minutes after I left the hotel.

In Canada, nobody likes to 'make a fuss'. Not like Americans, anyway. The safest thing to have done would have been to wad it up and throw it back at the fundie. He would have picked it up and left you alone.

3) Best Western Hotel Jacques Cartier in Hull, Quebec. I hope that place collapses. I mean fucking prisons have bigger cells than the so-called "rooms" of that hotel.

HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

They quartered you in HULL?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! WOOO!!!!!!

That's rich. That's just GREAT. The Hotel Jacques Cartier is used as a permanent residence of sorts by local prostitutes, or so I've read in the paper. Now, if I'd know you were coming, I'd have shuffled you off to something more cozy, and likely more affordable at that.

[Glocksman]

Save the Chick tracts and hand one out to the panhandlers who accost you.

Besides, you didn't see Canada at all. REAL Canada is outside Ontario.

Or so says my uncle who lives in Edmonton.

[Enigma]

Save the Chick tracts and hand one out to the panhandlers who accost you.

Besides, you didn't see Canada at all. REAL Canada is outside Ontario.

Or so says my uncle who lives in Edmonton.

You mean "Nowhereville".

[Darth Wong]

Save the Chick tracts and hand one out to the panhandlers who accost you.

That's brilliant.

Besides, you didn't see Canada at all. REAL Canada is outside Ontario.

Or so says my uncle who lives in Edmonton.

Your Uncle is just jealous that he doesn't live in the most important province in the country.

[Enigma]

You went to the war museum? In OTTAWA? We have way the hell better museums here than that tiny thing. It's the one I keep making apologies for to visiting friends and family.

As an odd coincidence, they're busy building a new, improved war museum on the other side of the hill, but it's only half-built.

It's not even half built. I've delivered architectual plans to that site many times, and they are not even close to finishing it. But from what I've seen, it is going to be HUGE.

Also, with the construction of the musuem, they're going to redevelop the rest of the LeBreton Flats!

[Next of Kin]

Save the Chick tracts and hand one out to the panhandlers who accost you.

Besides, you didn't see Canada at all. REAL Canada is outside Ontario.

Or so says my uncle who lives in Edmonton.

If hangin' around a pick-up truck on cinder blocks, drinking a bud, and saying "yup" with your buddies is your cup of tea then you'll love REAL Canada.

[Drooling Iguana]

3) The CN Tower: the talest freestanding structure in the world. 14 meters taller than the Ostankino Tower in Moscow.

Toronto: Home of the biggest giant penis ever built!

[aerius]

Toronto: Home of the biggest giant penis ever built!

Also note that the CN Tower is right beside 2 dome-shaped structures, the SkyDome and the ACC. You could interpret it as a dick and 2 balls, but I choose to think of it as a titty-fuck.