Need gift advice for a Woman

Post by **LadyTevar** » 2003-12-07 03:30pm

Here's what I did with SirNitram:

I took him around to every store in the local mall, pointed out everything I'd like to have, and then told him to buy one of them.

As of yet, he's not bought anything, when I've already hidden his gift with the neighbor.

(No, Nit, George isn't going to tell or show you. Don't even think of trying.

)

SirNitram · Post by **SirNitram** » 2003-12-07 03:48pm

Condoms. Personally, I advocate the lubricated kind, though some of my friends have sworn by those fancy ribbed ones.

Why condoms? Well, condoms make a special kind of statement. Sometimes, when you relationship is still prudish and nervous, it's one which will either unlock her inner slut, or cause her to call the police and get a restraining order. When the two of you are comfortable with each other, it's a wonderful joke gift, especially if followed up by some sweet treat(Chocolate is the standard).

InnerBrat · Post by **InnerBrat** » 2003-12-07 03:59pm

What if you're not using condoms?

What would your SO do with condoms if your in a monogamous relationship and using hormonal contraception?

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2003-12-07 04:07pm

Balloon Animals.

Post by **LadyTevar** » 2003-12-07 04:55pm

InnerBrat wrote:What if you're not using condoms?

What would your SO do with condoms if your in a monogamous relationship and using hormonal contraception?

Well, they can be useful during that certain time of month if your man's queasy about certain things... like blood on his cock

SirNitram · Post by **SirNitram** » 2003-12-07 04:56pm

InnerBrat wrote:What if you're not using condoms?

What would your SO do with condoms if your in a monogamous relationship and using hormonal contraception?

Laugh at me. Or with me. It being a joke gift, you silly IB.

Illuminatus Primus · Post by **Illuminatus Primus** » 2003-12-07 04:58pm

InnerBrat wrote:What if you're not using condoms?

What would your SO do with condoms if your in a monogamous relationship and using hormonal contraception?

Doctors recommend condoms used during anal sex for sanitary and hygenic reasons.

Post by **LadyTevar** » 2003-12-07 04:58pm

Illuminatus Primus wrote:
InnerBrat wrote:What if you're not using condoms?

What would your SO do with condoms if your in a monogamous relationship and using hormonal contraception?
Doctors recommend condoms used during anal sex for sanitary and hygenic reasons.

but we're not Wong and don't do that kind of thing

InnerBrat · Post by **InnerBrat** » 2003-12-07 05:00pm

LadyTevar wrote:Well, they can be useful during that certain time of month if your man's queasy about certain things... like blood on his cock

Wuss.

Nitram, not you

I'm accepting IP's answer. Joke gifts are only acceptable if they're followed by something with chantilly lace or diamonds.

Or lots of RAM.

salm · Post by **salm** » 2003-12-07 05:18pm

LadyTevar wrote:
InnerBrat wrote:What if you're not using condoms?

What would your SO do with condoms if your in a monogamous relationship and using hormonal contraception?
Well, they can be useful during that certain time of month if your man's queasy about certain things... like blood on his cock

what do you mean "queasy"? blood on cock is outragously disgusting. not with a ten foot pole! yach!

(which reminds me of rainbow sex, mentioned by kojikun in some other thread)

muse · Post by **muse** » 2003-12-07 08:38pm

InnerBrat wrote:Women can be divided cleanly into two:

Women who love Tigger
Women who love Eeyore.

If you're really in love with her, you'll know which one she is. Buy her a giant fluffy version, or an electronic one. (Like a bouncing Tigger)

Bouncy! Bouncy! Bouncy! Yeah, I have a desktop full of fluffy Tiggers, I keep getting them from both guys and girls. And then there's our swim coach, the entire team chipped in and bought her a Tigger suit. Get her a fluffy koala bear, it's different and it's cute.