Math = Evil ;)

Faram · Post by **Faram** » 2004-01-17 04:11pm

A public-school teacher tried to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a square, a slide rule, and a calculator.
He was arrested and charged with carrying weapons of math instruction.
Attorney General Ashcroft said he believes the man may be a member of al-gebra. "Al-gebra is a fearsome cult," said Ashcroft.
"They reach average solutions by means and extremes and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.
They use secret code names like X and Y and refer to 'unknowns.' We believe they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.
As the Greek philanderer, Isosceles, once said, 'There are three sides to every triangle.'"
President Bush said, "If God wanted us to have weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes.
I am gratified that we now have a sine that these math-dogs, intent on protracting us, are willing to disintegrate us with calculus disregard.
Murky statisticians love to inflict plane on every sphere of influence!" The President added, "Under the circumferences, we must differentiate their root, make our point, and draw the line.
These weapons of math instruction have the potential to decimal everything in their math on a scalene never before seen unless we become exponents of a Higher Power and begin to factor-in random facts of vertex." Attorney General Ashcroft concluded, "As our Great Leader would say, read my ellipse.
Here is one principle he is uncertainty of: though they continue to multiply, their days are numbered, as the hypotenuse tightens around their necks!"

Brother-Captain Gaius · Post by **Brother-Captain Gaius** » 2004-01-17 04:21pm

Some of it was good (weapons of math instruction XD), other bits were rather corny.

SyntaxVorlon · Post by **SyntaxVorlon** » 2004-01-17 04:47pm

I've heard this one twice already.

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2004-01-17 05:11pm

I've heard the first three lines, but not the rest. It's so corny it's kind of funny.

YT300000 · Post by **YT300000** » 2004-01-17 06:20pm

The third time I've heard it.

Today.

Xenophobe3691 · Post by **Xenophobe3691** » 2004-01-17 07:16pm

God that's horrible...

Worlds Spanner · Post by **Worlds Spanner** » 2004-01-17 10:07pm

YT300000 wrote:The third time I've heard it.

Today.

Interesting how the web works, isn't it?

So many times last summer my roommate would tell me to look at a website and I'd say "Yeah, I saw that an hour ago."

_________

Myself, I find this quite funny.

lance · Post by **lance** » 2004-01-18 12:27am

My algebra teacher read that in class about a week ago. Odd.

Sarevok · Post by **Sarevok** » 2004-01-18 12:56am

The "al-Gebra" terrorist group part was the funniest.

InnerBrat · Post by **InnerBrat** » 2004-01-18 07:28am

*laughs at the thought Dubya might try and outlaw education*

Oh no, wait a minute....

Xenophobe3691 · Post by **Xenophobe3691** » 2004-01-18 11:41am

InnerBrat wrote:*laughs at the thought Dubya might try and outlaw education*

Oh no, wait a minute....

Here in the U.S., it's the States that take charge of education. And in my home state, they do a piss poor job as is