Crazy Fucking TOURONS

[The Yosemite Bear]

Ok, I am down a few hundred today, that I really needed. Why. See the Title.

I was driving through the most dangerous section of Roadway in the Yosemite Park area a steep winding grade known to locals as "Queen Elisabeth" (Accedotaly because the last time Her Highness visited our park one of her security detail was driving too fast in the lead motorcycle, swerved for a rockslide and went over.) I kills quite a few people every year, I currently have lost a windshield, three tires, and today my fan belts to this road way. A touron (Tourist + Moron) was drving, while his passanger was hanging out of the window with a camera, passes me, and then looses control of the vehicle, to aviod killing the passanger (Who is still half way out the window, I went into the flint filled area off the road and spray from his tires went under my hood, casualties (My battery, cables, and Fanbelts). Had to get my car towed, and was on the road about six hours later......

.....I think I am taking a break from driving for a few weeks.

No, how to get those stains and that smell out of the undies....

[The Yosemite Bear]

for clarifications on actual speeds.

Posted limit: 30mph (about 50kph)
My Speed 30mph (About 50kph)
Idiot's Speed: 50mph (When he was passing me)about 90kph
Speed I was going when I went off the road and almost over the edge
15mph (about 20something kph)

Miles/Kilo's I drove with a busted battery before I made it to the first phone: 30miles (about 50 klicks)

[weemadando]

Tourons... I like this term.

Down here in little ole scenic tassie we have quite a few.

My favourites are the ones that think that they can make it up Jacobs Ladder (http://www.tased.edu.au/tot/ne/benlomond.html that is a rather nice bit of it) in a crappy 2wd rent-a-car WITHOUT ANY FUCKING CHAINS!

This is not mentioning the North Ams/Random Euro's that forget that we drive on the LEFT side of the fucking road.

[The Yosemite Bear]

You know I lost a light this winter in a parking lot 'header (Head on collission in a parking lot generally under 10mph/15kph, just enough to dent metal and break glass), with a chainless Japanese who was on the LEFT side of the road.

[weemadando]

Damn eh. Generally the Japanese are fairly good drivers. That guy must have been a frickin moron. I remember to drive on the right side of the road in GTA, Mafia et al...

[The Yosemite Bear]

Well, parking lots are different too. People think that you can drive what ever fucking way you want in a parking lot. Hell, it was one of the funnest incidents, cause he saw me, hit the breaks, slid, I saw him slide, and went from still to reverse, so our net KE didn't to shit except crack the plastic "Glass" on my Driver Side turn lamp.

[weemadando]

I remember my one and only "crash". Moving off from some traffic lights (like rolling at under walking pace, some of my friends verified this fact) an idiot at the front of the queue turns without indicating. Everyone brakes (including me). The car comes to a stop just soon enough to have hit the guy in front (damn eh? It gets better...). Anyhow, we both pull off the road to assess damage. My bumper is inside out (seriously) his shiny brand new tow-ball (just installed that afternoon) has some of my paint on it. We laugh about the fact that if it hadn't been for the goddamn towball I wouldn't have hit him. Problem was the bumper looked like I hit something while going about 30 or 40 kmh.

The next day I went around the wreckers and found a bumper that matched. Unfortunately it was red, and my car was blue (thus it being called Rupolph from that time on). Replaced the bumper with some help from the local servo and was told to leave the nicely inverted one in the sun. After a day in the sun it had popped back into shape. As such there is a spare bumper bar in the shed to this day.

What a tale eh? And of course my friends gave me shit about it for about a week until in one night they managed to write off no less than three of their individual cars including a beautiful Jaguar XJ-6 sovereign.

[The Yosemite Bear]

Wimper

poor Jag

[weemadando]

The car was nice, the guy was a complete tosser.

[The Yosemite Bear]

Yeah, the niceness of the car is usually in inverse proportion to the niceness of the driver.

There are exceptions, my Uncle Eric's got a half dozen fully restored sports cars, and has the least ego in a Photographer I have ever encountered. (Most of the Photographers I have met when I was in college, and at AP conventions have enough to give C.S. a run for his money).

Or Darkstar, the only person whose car is a worse example of a red neck POS then mine.