Top 50 WORST songs

RedImperator · Post by **RedImperator** » 2003-08-17 02:33pm

Take your pick of whining, bitching, screaming, talentless "new metal" bands. Papa Roach is the archetype of this type of band: "LIFE'S NOT FAIR!!!" Yeah, no shit it isn't--you're rich and get all the pussy you want for singing that shit, and I have to work for a living.

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2003-08-17 03:11pm

"The Magic Stick" is the worst vocal recording ever. I'm not sure it even qualifies as a song.

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-08-17 03:19pm

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:
Simon H.Johansen wrote:What about "Barbarism Returns" by Graveland?

It features the clumsiest drumming ever, plus the most unintelligible vocals I've yet heard.
Whawhat by whowho?

Graveland is a metal band from Poland, more famous for their political viewpoints than their music. (the average Graveland interview consists of the vocalist ranting about how much he hates foreigners, then followed by a rant about all other bands being sell-outs. Ridiculous, isn't it?)

Aside from their xenophobia, there are four notable things about this band:

1) The drummer was totally out of sync with the rest of the band until their seventh album (On the worst example, "Barbarism Returns", it sounds like he just pounds the drums without even thinking about rhythm)
2) Their seven first albums all have keyboard instrumental intros, just like all Bal-Sagoth albums
3) Their song titles appear to be stolen from Manowar
4) Their vocalist screeches and hisses out the lyrics in the most unintelligible way possible

I once downloaded some of their music out of sheer curiosity.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-08-17 03:30pm

Darth Wong wrote:Anything which can be classified as dance, rap, or hip-hop. One could easily fill up a "top 50 worst song" list with any one of those categories alone.

You do realise Rage Against The Machine consider themselves hiphop? And what would the 80s have been without Run DMC? NOTHING! THAT'S WHAT!

And dance?!

What the hell is wrong with you man? Hackers would have no soundtrack!

hmm...worst songs = cheesy pretentious castrati metal, bright pink pop like steps, stuff with guitars that tries to be edgy but is just crap, oh and limp bizkit rap-metal feces.

Next of Kin · Post by **Next of Kin** » 2003-08-17 03:33pm

My name is Luka, I live on the second floor...

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-08-17 03:38pm

Rye wrote:hmm...worst songs = cheesy pretentious castrati metal.

What is castrati metal??

For all the years I've been listening to metal, I've heard of Heavy Metal, Black Metal, Death Metal, Melodic Death Metal, Melodic Black Metal, Symphonic Black Metal, Power Metal, Thrash Metal, Speed Metal, Doom Metal, Grindcore, Nazi Metal, Gothic Metal, Sludge Metal, Hair Metal, Christian Metal, Viking Metal, Pagan Metal, Folk Metal, Troll Metal, Polka Metal, Nu-Metal, Extreme Metal, Barbarian Metal, Astral Spectral Metal, Hyperspeed Metal, War-Metal, Sheet Metal, Hell Metal, Glamour Metal, Forest Metal, Celtic Metal, Poser Metal, Funk Metal, Progressive and Stoner Metal... (also B-Movie Metal, Filk Metal and Red Metal which are genre classifications I've invented) but Castrati Metal?? WTF is that??

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2003-08-17 03:45pm

I would assume it's really high-pitched metal.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-08-17 04:11pm

Simon H.Johansen wrote:
Rye wrote:hmm...worst songs = cheesy pretentious castrati metal.
WTF is that??

any metal where the singer sounds castrated, i.e. all high notes, and too many guitar solos, no double bass drum. Crud like saxon or magnum. Skankily cheesy stuff.

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2003-08-17 04:23pm

Metallica - St Anger

Madly In Anger With You, Yeah I'm Madly In Anger With You (repeat over and over again with virtually none of the rest of the band doing anything)

I don't like metallica but their other tracks are pure gold compared to this shit.

zombie84 · Post by **zombie84** » 2003-08-17 04:31pm

Saxon fucking rocks man! If you hate so-called "castrati" metal (a term you seem to have made up) then we wouldnt have Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, AC/DC, Saxon, Mercyful Fate, Deep Purple, Black Sabbath, Helloween or pretty much any other non-thrash/death from pre-1990. Where the fuck would we be without any of those? Those fucking defined metal. The operatic vocals showcased singers who could actually sing, who actually could be considered musicians for the way they manipulated their voice, and guitarist who could shred the fuck outta their guitars instead of doing crappy three-chord Green Day shit. If musical complexity and musical competance are considered pretentious its easy to see why Linkin Park and co are number one on the radio.

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2003-08-17 05:10pm

Anything recent involving any bunch of pre-pubescent primadonnas. S-Club Juniors being a prime example - I have no desire to see a bunch of 13 year olds singing the same kind of crap over and over again, nor do I wish to hear them singing about getting high, having sex or anything else like that, because they are thirteen.

Also included in that is Daphne and Celeste. Who should be shot. Repeatedly. Frankly, aside from attempting to do 'Schools Out for Summer', the rest of their songs are god-awful - 'Ooh stick you?' - ughhh... probably the worst song I can think of.

Generally, I find any of the new generated pop idol style crap to extremely objectionable, and I resent the amount of covers we seem to get at the minute.

Mini-rant over. I'm off to chase S-Club Juniors up a tree and will then set fire to it.

Hethrir · Post by **Hethrir** » 2003-08-17 05:29pm

zombie84 wrote:Saxon fucking rocks man! If you hate so-called "castrati" metal (a term you seem to have made up) then we wouldnt have Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, AC/DC, Saxon, Mercyful Fate, Deep Purple, Black Sabbath, Helloween or pretty much any other non-thrash/death from pre-1990. Where the fuck would we be without any of those? Those fucking defined metal. The operatic vocals showcased singers who could actually sing, who actually could be considered musicians for the way they manipulated their voice, and guitarist who could shred the fuck outta their guitars instead of doing crappy three-chord Green Day shit. If musical complexity and musical competance are considered pretentious its easy to see why Linkin Park and co are number one on the radio.

You are not alone in this world. It saddens me every day when real bands are critizised for being 'too technical.' It's like, what? How can music be too technical??

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-08-17 06:19pm

zombie84 wrote:Saxon fucking rocks man! If you hate so-called "castrati" metal (a term you seem to have made up)

no duh, i mean, who would really want to be renowned for having your balls cut off, musically?

then we wouldnt have Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, AC/DC, Saxon, Mercyful Fate, Deep Purple, Black Sabbath, Helloween or pretty much any other non-thrash/death from pre-1990.

What's so bad about having nothing other than thrash/death? I wouldn't mind if they'd all had phil steele esque vocals instead, that'd have been much better imo.

Where the fuck would we be without any of those? Those fucking defined metal. The operatic vocals showcased singers who could actually sing, who actually could be considered musicians for the way they manipulated their voice,

then why not sing better, like oh i dunno, Burt from fear factory, or Phil from Pantera(especially like in hollow, keep first album high notes to a minimum

?

and guitarist who could shred the fuck outta their guitars instead of doing crappy three-chord Green Day shit. If musical complexity and musical competance are considered pretentious its easy to see why Linkin Park and co are number one on the radio.

You can have guitar solos, just don't go overzealous with them, like draw the line at anything that has excessive solo-wanking if heavy chords or tunes don't go with it. Like i don't mind zakk wylde's black label society or slayer etc, as long as it's heavy, it'll be good. If it's just jumping about in spandex (sorry ein

) with your testes retracting into your body with nothing but some guy with a mullet showing how fast he can wank his guitar, it should be dead and gone. [/endrant]

and saxon suck. blech.

Spyder · Post by **Spyder** » 2003-08-17 06:52pm

Does the song Carrie Fisher sings in the Star Wars Holiday special count?

zombie84 · Post by **zombie84** » 2003-08-17 07:03pm

Rye wrote:
zombie84 wrote:Saxon fucking rocks man! If you hate so-called "castrati" metal (a term you seem to have made up)
no duh, i mean, who would really want to be renowned for having your balls cut off, musically?

I dont see what the big problem is; when people sing in any sort of melodic and musical way, your voice naturally heightens. Gruff vocals were unheard of then anyway, and the only real ones to do it at that time were Lemmy and James Hetfield, both of whom i love, but lets face it--they cant fucking sing! Death metal vocals are fine but if you consider them to be musicians or anyone with talent (aside from the marvel of being able to sustain raspy screams, but then many of the early 80's death vocalists have permanently fucked up their voices now) you're just being naive. Bruce Dickinson and Rob Halford had incredible, majestic voices and still are among the most talented singers in the field--i wish i could say that black and death metal vocalists are talented singers, but they fucking arent any more talented than 50 cent, even if the band as a whole is good. The only real high-pitched singer that i can agree with you on is King Diamond of Mercyful Fate, because his singing is nothing but high-pitched wailing without any real technique (not that im disrespecting him, Mercyful Fate was great).

Rye wrote:
zombie84 wrote: then we wouldnt have Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, AC/DC, Saxon, Mercyful Fate, Deep Purple, Black Sabbath, Helloween or pretty much any other non-thrash/death from pre-1990.
What's so bad about having nothing other than thrash/death? I wouldn't mind if they'd all had phil steele esque vocals instead, that'd have been much better imo.

Theres nothing wrong with Thrash or death, but the two genres are so limiting. repetive drumming, heavy riffing and screamed vocals are tolerable, but it gets old real fucking fast. The best of these bands were the ones who incorperated influences from your so-called "castrati metal"--In Flames and the entire Gothenburg style is based off of Iron Maiden and the NWOBHM, and Metallica was inspired by Diamond Head and the NWOBHM. Without the NWOBHM, modern metal wouldnt exist. Limiting yourself to the two most primitive genres of metal is stupid.

Rye wrote:
zombie84 wrote:where the fuck would we be without any of those? Those fucking defined metal. The operatic vocals showcased singers who could actually sing, who actually could be considered musicians for the way they manipulated their voice,
then why not sing better, like oh i dunno, Burt from fear factory, or Phil from Pantera(especially like in hollow, keep first album high notes to a minimum ?

you consider Burton Bell a better singer? WTF!? I love Fear Factory, great band, and Burt Bell has a great sound for their style, but a talented singer? No fucking way! I can sing death metal. Anyone with a tough voicebox can. Show me someone who can belt em out like RJ Dio! I'd like to see fucking Burt Bell try to actually sing, his voice would probably crack like a twig! Jesus that claim is so rediculous im not sure if your just being sarcastic

You can have guitar solos, just don't go overzealous with them, like draw the line at anything that has excessive solo-wanking if heavy chords or tunes don't go with it. Like i don't mind zakk wylde's black label society or slayer etc, as long as it's heavy, it'll be good. If it's just jumping about in spandex (sorry ein ) with your testes retracting into your body with nothing but some guy with a mullet showing how fast he can wank his guitar, it should be dead and gone.

solos are fucking great. Bands today dont do solos. They used to be the highlight of a song, when guitarists could actually play their instruments. Thankfully i've noticed that more and more bands are doing solos again.
Yes, 80's fashion statements havent exactly aged well, but who gives a fuck about the image? Im in it for the music, and all i know is that when i listen to Armored Saint or Mercyful Fate i hear damn talented musicians who can play great solos, sing great notes and compose great complex songs that go beyond what is offered by mainstream metal, which seems rather primitive by comparison. God, i sound like im bashing anything less complex than Dream Theater. I love death metal and black metal and thrash and all the other more extreme sides of the metal spectrum but they can only offer so much because there isnt a lot to them, with some exceptions, and i sure as fuck cant understand how someone would say they are more talented than classics like Priest or Saxon just because they dont play the same downtuned riffs and scream unintelligable vocals that give their vocalists throat scar tissue.

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-08-17 08:37pm

DPDarkPrimus wrote:Besides "The Final Countdown"? I don't know...

WHAT?!! That's my favourite pep band song ever! It is SOOO MUCH FUN!!!!

EmperorSolo51 · Post by **EmperorSolo51** » 2003-08-17 08:47pm

I think the worst song of all time should be "Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds" cover by William Shatner. That song almost made me lose my sanity.

Montcalm · Post by **Montcalm** » 2003-08-17 08:53pm

EmperorSolo51 wrote:I think the worst song of all time should be "Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds" cover by William Shatner. That song almost made me lose my sanity.

Silly me i thought the title was "Lucy`s in a fight with Linus"

To be serious i`ll say anything by Celine Dion,i heard earlier today that Stephen King said that (Who let the dogs out) is better than all of CDs songs.

Post by **haas mark** » 2003-08-17 08:54pm

thecreech wrote:
verilon wrote:I shall kick you.. I happen to like Linkin Park, two boy bands (though not widely recognized ones), Disturbed, and Cher.

~ver
I am so sorry (Pats verilon on the back) its ok. The first step to recovery is to admit that you have a problem which you have already done. The next step is to listen to better music.

[bite] (you deserved that) No one said I didn't listen to better music. But I happen to like them. And you can't say "WORST" if it's not close to a consensus.

~ver

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-08-17 09:11pm

EmperorSolo51 wrote:I think the worst song of all time should be "Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds" cover by William Shatner. That song almost made me lose my sanity.

I disagree, that entire album is fucking comic gold, chief. Mr. Tambourine Man is even funnier.

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-08-17 09:11pm

EmperorSolo51 wrote:I think the worst song of all time should be "Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds" cover by William Shatner. That song almost made me lose my sanity.

But...but...but.....that's so fucking hilarious! How can you not love it?!

Demiurge · Post by **Demiurge** » 2003-08-17 09:23pm

Some horrible recent songs...

"Rock Your Body" by Justin Timberlake (hurts my brain lol)
"Air Force Ones" by Nelly
"I'm A Slave 4 U" by Britney Spears (Avril is not the first 1337 pop star)
"Nookie" by Limp Bizkit. (so you can take that cookie and shove it up your, yeah!)
That one song that goes "closer than my peeps you are to me."
"It Wasn't Me" by Shaggy.
"It's Been Awhile" by Staind. (played infinity plus one times)

All of these are played endlessly on radio stations from New York to Baghdad.

Post by **haas mark** » 2003-08-17 09:29pm

Zaia wrote:
EmperorSolo51 wrote:I think the worst song of all time should be "Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds" cover by William Shatner. That song almost made me lose my sanity.
But...but...but.....that's so fucking hilarious! How can you not love it?!

Wait.. wait.. Shatner covered that!??!?

Is it worth it to download it..?

~ver

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-08-17 09:42pm

Demiurge wrote:Some horrible recent songs...

<snip>

All of these are played endlessly on radio stations from New York to Baghdad.

Ok, I'm not defending any of those songs in particular, but I think ANY song played over and over and over again gets annoying. Does that actually decrease the quality level of that song? I know I've heard "Stairway to Heaven" a billion times on 70's stations and I know I get sick of it. Does that mean it's a horrible song? Consensus would say no, but I sure do get annoyed by it when it's played over and over again.

My point is that some of the songs that are played to death aren't actually bad songs. And I think the fact that the radio plays them repeatedly is actually against the best interest of the artists, but what do I know? I'm just a lowly musician...

EmperorSolo51 · Post by **EmperorSolo51** » 2003-08-17 09:45pm

verilon wrote:
Zaia wrote:
EmperorSolo51 wrote:I think the worst song of all time should be "Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds" cover by William Shatner. That song almost made me lose my sanity.
But...but...but.....that's so fucking hilarious! How can you not love it?!
Wait.. wait.. Shatner covered that!??!? Is it worth it to download it..?

~ver

http://www.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Shatner

George Clooney chose William Shatner's "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" as one of his Desert Island Discs as an incentive to leave the island. He said, "If you listen to [this song], you will hollow out your own leg and make a canoe out of it to get off this island.". Shatner again satirises himself in the recent cartoon series "Futurama": in Episode 56 he recites (spoken-word) Eminem's "Slim Shady" song during a feast, spoofing his own "Lucy" chant.

All he does is is just talk through LSD. Like this:

[shatner]Lucy.... in the.... sky.... with....diamonds. [/shatner]
[/quote]