My home was invaded this morning. (LONG)

Durandal · Post by **Durandal** » 2004-04-13 12:00pm

You don't have to kill the thing with a BB gun, just pop it in the ass. It'll get the message.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2004-04-13 01:03pm

That was thoroughly unpleasant, i would've just let it outside.

The BB gun thing is a good idea, a friend of mine has a replica DE BB gun, and that hurts when you get shot with it. A squirrel would soon get the message if it got hot with one of those.

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2004-04-13 01:07pm

Durandal wrote:You don't have to kill the thing with a BB gun, just pop it in the ass. It'll get the message.

Until it decided to go back inside again.

These aren't cats and dogs, here.

Vertigo1 · Post by **Vertigo1** » 2004-04-13 03:37pm

See, this is why you either set traps for it, or fucking call animal control.

Oni Koneko Damien · Post by **Oni Koneko Damien** » 2004-04-13 04:02pm

Consequences wrote:1. Let a potentially rabid squirrel take up residence in your house
2. Attempt to kill the thing, then have a injured, pissed off potentially rabid squirrel taking up residence in your house

Unless I'm mistaken, the length of survival of a rabies-infected creature is proportional to its body mass. If the squirrel had rabies, it would most likely be dead in a day or so, and thus, this concern really wouldn't apply.

-Damien

Post by **LadyTevar** » 2004-04-13 04:03pm

Spanky The Dolphin wrote:He could have always caught and ate it. You know skinning a squirrel's like peeling a banana.

Oh yeah... Just clip off all four feet and tail, cut a tiny slit to start it going and TUG. When you have the skin turned inside out over the head, just chop off the head at the back of the neck and toss it away.

Gut it, wash thoroughly, cut into quarters, and then roll it in flour and crumbs and fry it up like chicken!!

Dammit... now i'm hungry.......

Anarchist Bunny · Post by **Anarchist Bunny** » 2004-04-13 04:25pm

On another note, you got lucky man. I had to take out a possum equally unprepared. Only possums are tough as fuck to kill, someone said it can take a .45 to the head and keep on truckin'. I had a dull butcher knife thats tip was broken off. I got the thing in a net I use to catch my chickens but it was in bad shape so I quickly start stabbing it. All it does it agitate it and cause it a few small cuts, so I start kicking it. Not working, I send my mom away take it over to a fire pit put it's head on a hollow brink and smash a piece of rebar through it's eye and move it arround.

consequences · Post by **consequences** » 2004-04-13 05:11pm

Oni Koneko Damien wrote:
Consequences wrote:1. Let a potentially rabid squirrel take up residence in your house
2. Attempt to kill the thing, then have a injured, pissed off potentially rabid squirrel taking up residence in your house
Unless I'm mistaken, the length of survival of a rabies-infected creature is proportional to its body mass. If the squirrel had rabies, it would most likely be dead in a day or so, and thus, this concern really wouldn't apply.

-Damien

Rabies isn't the only possibility, and I wouldn't allow a squirrel to control my movements for even a day or so.

Sharp-kun · Post by **Sharp-kun** » 2004-04-13 06:14pm

Hmm, the Captain Scarlet of squirrels?

Batman · Post by **Batman** » 2004-04-13 06:35pm

LadyTevar wrote:
Spanky The Dolphin wrote:He could have always caught and ate it. You know skinning a squirrel's like peeling a banana.
Oh yeah... Just clip off all four feet and tail, cut a tiny slit to start it going and TUG. When you have the skin turned inside out over the head, just chop off the head at the back of the neck and toss it away.
Gut it, wash thoroughly, cut into quarters, and then roll it in flour and crumbs and fry it up like chicken!!
Dammit... now i'm hungry.......

OK this tears it. I don't give a rat's ass what Nitram will do to me
*puts LadyTevar on the List*

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2004-04-13 06:47pm

Sharp-kun wrote:Hmm, the Captain Scarlet of squirrels?

...O O...

I seem to recall one of my friend's flatmates finding a dead squirrel in her drawer when she arrived at the uni accomodation, not quite sure how it got there, but we can't rule out it climbing in just to indulge some sort of perverse 'death by female dorm room' fetish.

Slartibartfast · Post by **Slartibartfast** » 2004-04-13 07:26pm

Batman wrote:
LadyTevar wrote:
Spanky The Dolphin wrote:He could have always caught and ate it. You know skinning a squirrel's like peeling a banana.
Oh yeah... Just clip off all four feet and tail, cut a tiny slit to start it going and TUG. When you have the skin turned inside out over the head, just chop off the head at the back of the neck and toss it away.
Gut it, wash thoroughly, cut into quarters, and then roll it in flour and crumbs and fry it up like chicken!!
Dammit... now i'm hungry.......
OK this tears it. I don't give a rat's ass what Nitram will do to me
*puts LadyTevar on the List*

What IS your major disfunction? Of course squirrels are for eating, and so are rabbits and guinea pigs.

Durandal · Post by **Durandal** » 2004-04-13 07:38pm

Batman wrote:OK this tears it. I don't give a rat's ass what Nitram will do to me
*puts LadyTevar on the List*

Oh Jesus, get over yourself.

Batman · Post by **Batman** » 2004-04-13 07:42pm

Slartibartfast wrote: What IS your major disfunction? Of course squirrels are for eating, and so are rabbits and guinea pigs.

I pretend to be a giant bat and you need to ask what my disfunction is?

Besides, while I'll agree with rabbits being for eating, I dunno about guinea pigs. Truth is, I don't know they're good for anything. Kinda like the real world's tribbles.
Squirrels, OTOH, are cute, fuzzy, cuddly, and destined to roam around the forest without interference (with the possible exception of miniature giant space hamsters throwing nuts at them).
People who eat squirrels may very well be capable of shooting cats.

Batman · Post by **Batman** » 2004-04-13 07:48pm

Durandal wrote:
Batman wrote:OK this tears it. I don't give a rat's ass what Nitram will do to me
*puts LadyTevar on the List*
Oh Jesus, get over yourself.

You should either
a)grow a sense of humour, or
b)grow more specific when you're telling me I'm overdoing something.

Just a reminder from you friendly neigborhood sp...

Oh wait. Wrong universe...

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2004-04-13 07:49pm

Squirrels are perfectly suitible for eating, you know. It's not like it's something weird.

Xenophobe3691 · Post by **Xenophobe3691** » 2004-04-13 07:50pm

Wow. I attend UCF, so I know just how much of a pest squirrels can be. Wait till they become used to humans and start jumping on you. That's horrible, because those things can bite if they want, and they bite hard...

Durandal · Post by **Durandal** » 2004-04-13 09:03pm

Batman wrote:You should either
a)grow a sense of humour, or
b)grow more specific when you're telling me I'm overdoing something.

I meant you should stop presuming that anyone gives a shit about who you are and what your list is. People don't use the "evil" smiley thing when they're joking, so you can stop backpedaling any time now.

The Aliens · Post by **The Aliens** » 2004-04-13 09:49pm

Horrendous overkill- but I suppose you did the best you could with the things on hand. Even still, I think just leaving a door open and shooing the thign outside could have worked, especially if you take five minutes and seal off other exits.

I recommend investing in traps and poison- somewhat mroe humane than bludgening it to death with a toilet seat and leaving it half dead in the bag.

Bug-Eyed Earl · Post by **Bug-Eyed Earl** » 2004-04-13 09:56pm

If it gives anyone any satisfaction- I had nightmares last night. The squirrel's screams are what did it.

His Divine Shadow · Post by **His Divine Shadow** » 2004-04-14 02:16am

Durandal wrote:
Batman wrote:You should either
a)grow a sense of humour, or
b)grow more specific when you're telling me I'm overdoing something.
I meant you should stop presuming that anyone gives a shit about who you are and what your list is. People don't use the "evil" smiley thing when they're joking, so you can stop backpedaling any time now.

I'm quite sure I've used the evil smiley several times when joking.

Slartibartfast · Post by **Slartibartfast** » 2004-04-14 03:48am

You normally use the twisted smiley when joking. The evil smiley is for when you're extra angry.

Sarevok · Post by **Sarevok** » 2004-04-14 03:53am

Spanky The Dolphin wrote:Squirrels are perfectly suitible for eating, you know. It's not like it's something weird.

I would never eat a squirral. Dead squirrerls are gross.

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2004-04-14 03:59am

Well you don't just pick one up off the side of the road and peel it. You've got to shoot one first.

Solauren · Post by **Solauren** » 2004-04-14 06:46am

Crossbow's are lovely for dealing with a squirrel