15 ways to avoid a southern ass whoopin

Mitth`raw`nuruodo · Post by **Mitth`raw`nuruodo** » 2003-08-12 08:31pm

Jeremy wrote:I live in the most northern southern state... Florida.

Mr. Wong got his fillet because for the most part it is A)a mixed culture, and B)people like the idea of making money. Speaking of mixed, there are plenty of mixed couples in Florida.

and C) Florida is the tourist state/retirement home of the US. I swear, it seems EVERYONE either moves over to California or down here to FL when they retire. The toursts aren't bad, 'cause they leave after awhile. People coming and staying are not cool.

Andrew J. · Post by **Andrew J.** » 2003-08-12 09:07pm

I have an addition to the list.

Never tell the following joke:

Q: How hot is it in Atlanta right now?

A: Not nearly as hot as it was when General Sherman burned it down!

That one will get your ass kicked even if you're in the North and there are Southerners in hearing range, so just don't.

Grand Admiral Thrawn · Post by **Grand Admiral Thrawn** » 2003-08-12 09:08pm

Kelly Antilles wrote:Durandal, you are a total and complete asshole.
...
And I am MUCH better mannered, a whole lot more intelligent, MUCH, MUCH more litterate and definitely more civil than YOU.

IRONY OVERLOAD! DANGER! DANGER!

Johonebesus · Post by **Johonebesus** » 2003-08-12 10:51pm

Darth Wong wrote:And as long as we're on the subject, you forgot one sure-fire way to get your ass kicked in the South: be a black man and take a long look at a white woman.

Wong, that is simply untrue. I'm surprised that someone who goes on about tolerance and logic the way you do would make such stupid and uneducated comments. Where are most of the race riots? Seems to me they usually happen in L.A. or Detroit. With Rodney King, while L.A. was burning there was just a little half-hearted riot in Atlanta; I think they tipped a couple of cars and burned a liquor store and then went home.

Where is the KKK growing the fastest? The Midwest, that's where. Where are all the aryan neo-nazi skinheads types? Mostly in the West, I don't know that I've ever actually seen a skinhead in real life.

I've heard lots of folks complain about northern suburbs – when one black family moves in, the whites move out. Mixed neighborhoods are all over the place here (where neighborhoods exist at all).

And I don't know how it is up there, but interracial couples are quite common around here in North Georgia. In fact, the worst racist I know is my mother, and she spent most her life in the North.

Racism is a real problem all over the U.S. There are plenty of examples of racism in the South, and I know of a few diners in Macon I wouldn't take a black friend. But, from what I have observed first hand and in the media, racism is just as much a problem in the North, and especially in the West.

Connor MacLeod · Post by **Connor MacLeod** » 2003-08-12 11:17pm

I'd comment, but Brian (and Sean) are like buddies of mine and even if they didn't mind, I'd feel selfconscious about it

So instead, I say we convert this into a thread devoted to making fun of Durandal's hair

Post by **Gandalf** » 2003-08-12 11:45pm

Montcalm wrote:If you want to visit a place where people are civil and nice,come to Canada we do not start war for oil.

Or Australia even, we're nice people here, and still under Her Majesty's Commonwealth.

Drooling Iguana · Post by **Drooling Iguana** » 2003-08-13 12:29am

All I know is that it's called "pop," and will always be "pop." If you've got a problem with that, I'll kick your ass.

Post by **fgalkin** » 2003-08-13 12:39am

Drooling Iguana wrote:All I know is that it's called "pop," and will always be "pop." If you've got a problem with that, I'll kick your ass.

When I was learning English, the word was SODA, and soda it will remain.

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

Robert Treder · Post by **Robert Treder** » 2003-08-13 12:43am

Durran Korr wrote:I sincerely hope none of you people are ever driving through the South on business or otherwise (assuming that's not beneath you), because if you get a flat tire the only person who is going to stop to help you is a redneck.

You guys don't have tow-trucks or highway patrol? Don't you have call boxes on the side of the road?

phongn · Post by **phongn** » 2003-08-13 01:00am

Florida has tow trucks roaming the major roadways as well as call boxes, but those can be kinda rare.

Howedar · Post by **Howedar** » 2003-08-13 01:01am

LadyTevar wrote:
Howedar wrote:Dumbfuck arrogant Easterners. Southern California is as far south as you are, yet you lay claim to an entire cardinal direction as your own.

Yes, I know its a joke. However, the arrogance is not.
The difference is, Southern Cal was settled by Northerners!

As was the Southeast...

Superman · Post by **Superman** » 2003-08-13 01:07am

HAHAHA

Yeah, I was in the south for three years in Georgia. I remember that instead of the word "plan" they would say "fix." Like this: "I'm fixin' to go get me some grits." I found it interesting.

Yuri Prime · Post by **Yuri Prime** » 2003-08-13 01:28am

Hey Drach, I'll have a pasta primavera with a Dr. Pepper. No squirrel please.

This isn't somebody's idea of a troll drill is it?

Post by **The Yosemite Bear** » 2003-08-13 02:23am

I don't think so...

Thien again I grew up in Humbolt and Kern counties the two highest redneck populations in Californication.

Oh, and my mom's from Texas, and very literate as well.

Post by **Lagmonster** » 2003-08-13 09:13am

Drooling Iguana wrote:All I know is that it's called "pop," and will always be "pop." If you've got a problem with that, I'll kick your ass.

When I'm giving someone my money - and a shitload more than I need to (since pop doesn't actually need to cost 3 bucks a glass) - I know that I'm not just paying for the drink. I'm paying for them to bring it to me in a clean glass and act very pleasant and servile while doing it.

Thus, if I ask for a 'glass of Cream Soda Crush brand soda pop', I don't want to see any smirks or derision, or the tip just went bye-bye. Luckily, most restaurants I've been to, Southern, Northern, or whatever, have followed this basic forumla for business success rather well.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-08-13 09:17am

Johonebesus wrote:And I don't know how it is up there, but interracial couples are quite common around here in North Georgia. In fact, the worst racist I know is my mother, and she spent most her life in the North.

Right, that's why you have high schools in Georgia who just had their first interracial high school dance in the last year or two, and a vote to legalize interracial marriage narrowly passed by a 60/40 margin in Alabama. No racists there

Racism is a real problem all over the U.S. There are plenty of examples of racism in the South, and I know of a few diners in Macon I wouldn't take a black friend.

Yet you bristle at my accusation?

But, from what I have observed first hand and in the media, racism is just as much a problem in the North, and especially in the West.

"from what I have observed first hand" ... yet earlier you said "I don't know how it is up there". Please make up your mind.

Besides, so what? The midwest is a giant nothing. What do you expect but wackjob and militia groups, who constitute only a fringe element anyway, and how does that refute Southern racism, when you yourself admit there are places you wouldn't take a black friend in your neck of the woods?

Do you know what logical fallacy you're committing right now?

Next of Kin · Post by **Next of Kin** » 2003-08-13 10:21am

Durran Korr wrote: ...because if you get a flat tire the only person who is going to stop to help you is a redneck.

Luckily, I can change a flat on my own. So unless I have two, I won't be flagging down a primer-pink coloured pick-up truck.

pellaeons_scion · Post by **pellaeons_scion** » 2003-08-13 01:13pm

Or Australia even, we're nice people here, and still under Her Majesty's Commonwealth.

Nice to see Australia being represented in what seems to be a mainly US thread

Its good to make ourselves known from time to time.

Dumb question from Oz. What are grits??

Knife · Post by **Knife** » 2003-08-13 01:16pm

Coyote wrote:snippity snip snip snip

Hahahaha, I think that was even better than the original at the begining of the thread.

Knife · Post by **Knife** » 2003-08-13 01:18pm

Dumb question from Oz. What are grits??

Good

Post by **LadyTevar** » 2003-08-13 01:27pm

pellaeons_scion wrote:
Or Australia even, we're nice people here, and still under Her Majesty's Commonwealth.
Nice to see Australia being represented in what seems to be a mainly US thread Its good to make ourselves known from time to time.

Dumb question from Oz. What are grits??

Hominy corn meal boiled into a oatmeal-like pudding, served with butter, cheese, or baconbits.

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-08-13 01:28pm

Right, that's why you have high schools in Georgia who just had their first interracial high school dance in the last year or two,

One high school, Mike, one.

and a vote to legalize interracial marriage narrowly passed by a 60/40 margin in Alabama. No racists there

The results of a stupid little referendum that probably had a less than 40 percent voter turnout (and most of those voters were likely old farts, anyway, since younger people are less likely to vote in referendums).

Besides, so what? The midwest is a giant nothing. What do you expect but wackjob and militia groups, who constitute only a fringe element anyway, and how does that refute Southern racism, when you yourself admit there are places you wouldn't take a black friend in your neck of the woods?

He's not trying to refute the fact that there is racism in the South, he's trying to refute the not-so-subtle insinuations holding the South to be the equivalent of apartheid South Africa (I find your claim that a black guy can't take a look at a white female without getting beat up especially ridiculous, and absolutely untrue).

Demiurge · Post by **Demiurge** » 2003-08-13 01:40pm

Robert Treder wrote:
Durran Korr wrote:I sincerely hope none of you people are ever driving through the South on business or otherwise (assuming that's not beneath you), because if you get a flat tire the only person who is going to stop to help you is a redneck.
You guys don't have tow-trucks or highway patrol? Don't you have call boxes on the side of the road?

More than in the west, I tell you what.

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-08-13 01:45pm

Robert Treder wrote:
Durran Korr wrote:I sincerely hope none of you people are ever driving through the South on business or otherwise (assuming that's not beneath you), because if you get a flat tire the only person who is going to stop to help you is a redneck.
You guys don't have tow-trucks or highway patrol? Don't you have call boxes on the side of the road?

What do you think the highway patrol consists of? Who do you think drives the tow trucks?

Next of Kin · Post by **Next of Kin** » 2003-08-13 01:47pm

Durran Korr wrote:
What do you think the highway patrol consists of? Who do you think drives the tow trucks?

Transplants from new england?

StarDestroyer.Net BBS

15 ways to avoid a southern ass whoopin

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