The top 5 worst movies ever thread

Seele · Post by **Seele** » 2003-03-29 12:48am

1) Anaconda --- 2 hours of watching that rapper, Ice Cube struggle not to cuss.

2) Mortal Kombat Annihilation --- When Scorpion showed up and yelled, "SUCKER!!!" you realized you are one when you are $7.50 short.

3) Ravenous ---- when it starts with a quote of ,"Eat me" We knew we were in trouble.

4)Chicago ---- it's Harvey Weinstein sucking so much cock in hollywood to get that POS winning the Academy Award. The less said about that travisty the better.

5) Highlander 2 ----- why a sequel to a great movie that left no room for sequels at all must be made? to make money and shitting on everything that made the 1st movie so good and fun to watch.

Post by **weemadando** » 2003-03-29 12:54am

Sokar wrote:Worst movie ever = "A Knights Tale" - As some of you know, Im a history major, and my favorite period is the Middle Ages from about 450 to 1490 AD. Needles to say this movie made me cringe in ways I didn't know were possible, and during the scenes with Edward "Black Prince" of Wales I actually started cursing at the screen. I know that its supposed to be a popcorn action flick, but given the stupidity of the current crop of youth, far to many will take it as gospel in many parts. (I've already had people ask me if the whole jousting league/tournament thing was for real.......*shudders*) Add in a Nike swoosh, Chaucer as a drunk gambler and a triviallization of the 100 Years War and I was pissed.

Now imagine how I feel as a historian specialising in 20th century history when I am presented with movies like U571, Saving Private Ryan, Pearl Harbour and so on. That for some reason far too many people take as being "re-enactments".

I actually kinda liked A Knights Tale and because of you, I am going to have to see it again to remind myself why I haven't.

Sokar · Post by **Sokar** » 2003-03-29 01:24am

weemadando wrote:
Sokar wrote:Worst movie ever = "A Knights Tale" - As some of you know, Im a history major, and my favorite period is the Middle Ages from about 450 to 1490 AD. Needles to say this movie made me cringe in ways I didn't know were possible, and during the scenes with Edward "Black Prince" of Wales I actually started cursing at the screen. I know that its supposed to be a popcorn action flick, but given the stupidity of the current crop of youth, far to many will take it as gospel in many parts. (I've already had people ask me if the whole jousting league/tournament thing was for real.......*shudders*) Add in a Nike swoosh, Chaucer as a drunk gambler and a triviallization of the 100 Years War and I was pissed.
Now imagine how I feel as a historian specialising in 20th century history when I am presented with movies like U571, Saving Private Ryan, Pearl Harbour and so on. That for some reason far too many people take as being "re-enactments".

I actually kinda liked A Knights Tale and because of you, I am going to have to see it again to remind myself why I haven't.

I know exactly how you feel, U571 and Pearl Harbor were travestys, while SPR , had the feel and look , if not the history right.

You lost me a bit, are you going to re-watch it for the stuff you liked or becuse you watched it without being critical?

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-03-29 02:07am

j1j2j3 wrote:Crossroads staring Ms Spears.

It wasn't a surprise that it turned out so bad, as Britney Spears isn't even an actress in the first place.

Darth Garden Gnome · Post by **Darth Garden Gnome** » 2003-03-29 02:10am

Not to mention Signs. Whats his face (Shamalant?) didn't even try to make sense with that one.

Sokar · Post by **Sokar** » 2003-03-29 02:39am

Darth Garden Gnome wrote:Not to mention Signs. Whats his face (Shamalant?) didn't even try to make sense with that one.

Um , did we watch the same movie, it made perfect sense. Its the story of one mans crisis of faith, Mels character, the alien incursion and all is just window dressing for the story of Mel and his brother (Joaquin Phoenix) rediscovering their faith in themselves and God. It was a great movie, scared the hell out of me and moved me at the same time.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-03-29 02:41am

Sokar wrote:
Darth Garden Gnome wrote:Not to mention Signs. Whats his face (Shamalant?) didn't even try to make sense with that one.
Um , did we watch the same movie, it made perfect sense. Its the story of one mans crisis of faith, Mels character, the alien incursion and all is just window dressing for the story of Mel and his brother (Joaquin Phoenix) rediscovering their faith in themselves and God. It was a great movie, scared the hell out of me and moved me at the same time.

Is it just me, or is Mel Gibson on some kind of religious kick lately?

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-03-29 02:43am

Darth Wong wrote:
Sokar wrote:
Darth Garden Gnome wrote:Not to mention Signs. Whats his face (Shamalant?) didn't even try to make sense with that one.
Um , did we watch the same movie, it made perfect sense. Its the story of one mans crisis of faith, Mels character, the alien incursion and all is just window dressing for the story of Mel and his brother (Joaquin Phoenix) rediscovering their faith in themselves and God. It was a great movie, scared the hell out of me and moved me at the same time.
Is it just me, or is Mel Gibson on some kind of religious kick lately?

Yeah. He still hates the Catholic Church, though.

Darth Garden Gnome · Post by **Darth Garden Gnome** » 2003-03-29 02:44am

Sokar wrote:Um , did we watch the same movie, it made perfect sense. Its the story of one mans crisis of faith, Mels character, the alien incursion and all is just window dressing for the story of Mel and his brother (Joaquin Phoenix) rediscovering their faith in themselves and God. It was a great movie, scared the hell out of me and moved me at the same time.

Perhaps it was the sci-fi afficiando in me screaming out "THIS MOVIE SUCKS!" or perhaps it was the atheist in me screaming "THIS MOVIE SUCKS" but either way, I thought that movie sucked.

UltraViolence83 · Post by **UltraViolence83** » 2003-03-29 02:47am

I've seen the second one, but I had no idea there were FOUR fucking Aladdin movies! That is awful! I loved that movie (and the SNES game, too!) Sons of bitches. Disney is rapidly going down the shitter. They make fucking sequels for 50+ year-old movies straight to video because they know no one is going to bother going to a movie theatre to watch their worthless shit. I hope Walt Disney is rolling in his grave/frozen container/whatever the fuck he's in.

Worst movies that I'd never willingly watch again:

1. The Music Man (Sometimes I get that "Gary, Indiana" song stuck in my head. 'Nuff said.)
2. Jurassic Park 2 (SPEILBERG IS AN IDIOT WHY WERE THERE NUMEROUS GUNS AROUND BUT NO ONE GOT TO USE THEM ON THE DINOS!?!?)
3. Millenium (the one about time-travelling plane crash victims...Right name? Tedious.)
The next two I'd bother to watch again, probably:

4. Monty Python's Jabberwocky (Made less sense than usual MP hilarity. Redeeming quality: "You could live a week off that!")
5. Super Mario Brothers (Hey, I've got a great idea! Let's ignore the video game and piss off diehard Mario fans! YOSHI IS A FUCKING RAPTOR WHY GOD WHY Redeeming quality: Mario and Luigi were my childhood heroes. Nothing, not even homoerotic fanfix of SMB can take that away from me.)

Sokar · Post by **Sokar** » 2003-03-29 02:47am

Darth Wong wrote:Is it just me, or is Mel Gibson on some kind of religious kick lately?

Very much so , Mel Gibson has always been a card carrying Catholic. Hes doing some religious epic about the life of Jesus at the moment in Italy, and get this all the dialogue is in Aramaic.....the original tounge of Jesus , but a language thats been dead for nearly a millenium.......everyone in the world will have to read subtitles

Sokar · Post by **Sokar** » 2003-03-29 02:51am

Darth Garden Gnome wrote:
Sokar wrote:Um , did we watch the same movie, it made perfect sense. Its the story of one mans crisis of faith, Mels character, the alien incursion and all is just window dressing for the story of Mel and his brother (Joaquin Phoenix) rediscovering their faith in themselves and God. It was a great movie, scared the hell out of me and moved me at the same time.
Perhaps it was the sci-fi afficiando in me screaming out "THIS MOVIE SUCKS!" or perhaps it was the atheist in me screaming "THIS MOVIE SUCKS" but either way, I thought that movie sucked.

Fair enough, I liked it, but its not one thats in my regular movie rotation or anything.

Sokar · Post by **Sokar** » 2003-03-29 02:54am

Durran Korr wrote:Yeah. He still hates the Catholic Church, though.

Ok , did I just fuck up....I thought he was Catholic....an angry one over the whole sex abuse thing , but still Catholic........although I could be wrong.....

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-03-29 02:56am

Sokar wrote:
Durran Korr wrote:Yeah. He still hates the Catholic Church, though.
Ok , did I just fuck up....I thought he was Catholic....an angry one over the whole sex abuse thing , but still Catholic........although I could be wrong.....

Correct. A Catholic who hates the modern Catholic Church.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-03-29 03:01am

Didn't stop him from proudly advertising its virtues in "We Were Soldiers".

Post by **The Yosemite Bear** » 2003-03-29 03:01am

Should we tell Mel about the Borgias?

UltraViolence83 · Post by **UltraViolence83** » 2003-03-29 03:03am

Is "We Were Soldiers" any good?

Post by **The Yosemite Bear** » 2003-03-29 03:07am

Hell yes!

one of the better war movies of late

Post by **The Yosemite Bear** » 2003-03-29 03:08am

My stepdad was in the 101 in Vietnam, He loves that movie

Sokar · Post by **Sokar** » 2003-03-29 03:12am

The Yosemite Bear wrote:Should we tell Mel about the Borgias?

That might upset him a tad.....

UltraViolence83 · Post by **UltraViolence83** » 2003-03-29 03:12am

The Yosemite Bear wrote:Should we tell Mel about the Borgias?

Didn't quite get that at first...That was a Renassaince(sp?) Pope's family, right? I remember watching something about them on the History Channel. Decadent for normal people, let alone the most pixous(sp?) man in the fucking Church.

Post by **The Yosemite Bear** » 2003-03-29 03:19am

What's a little incest and murder to worry about.....

Sokar · Post by **Sokar** » 2003-03-29 03:35am

UltraViolence83 wrote:
The Yosemite Bear wrote:Should we tell Mel about the Borgias?
Didn't quite get that at first...That was a Renassaince(sp?) Pope's family, right? I remember watching something about them on the History Channel. Decadent for normal people, let alone the most pixous(sp?) man in the fucking Church.

Almost without exception the holder of the Papacy has never been the most pious of churchmen, often quite the opposite.

UltraViolence83 · Post by **UltraViolence83** » 2003-03-29 03:38am

Hmm...ok. How about I change "pious" to "One who should be less hypocritical than laymen." Key word: should.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-03-29 03:50am

UltraViolence83 wrote:Is "We Were Soldiers" any good?

If you can grit your teeth and get past the first half-hour or so, and if you don't mind the treacly, emotionally manipulative scenes sprinkled throughout the film and a tearful conclusion which breaks the scriptwriting rule of "show, don't tell", then yeah, I suppose you could call it a good movie.

Basically, the movie is good every time it shows men in the heat of battle. The rest of the time, it sucks shit.