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Movie Recommendations (movies to avoid)

Posted: 2003-01-17 03:34pm
by THEHOOLIGANJEDI
This is a counter to Durandal's Thread. But instead of Good movies to watch, this is for bad movies to avoid. I'm talking about movies so mind numbing that they should be avoided at all costs. This could also be put up as a sticky if the Mods wish.

Two movies to avoid:
-Halloween 3
-Batman and Robin

Posted: 2003-01-17 03:40pm
by Stravo
Battlefield Earth: Your brain will melt, garaunteed.

Jaws 3 in 3d YIKES!!!

Wing Commander: People will think you have epilepsy from cringing so much during this retarded turd.

Alien 3: You went from one of the all time classic sci fi movies to an utter DREG of a movie...followed up by

Alien: Resurrection AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! *Sound of Stravo falling out the nearest open window.*

Posted: 2003-01-17 03:40pm
by Ghost Rider
Highlander 2: oi.......

Posted: 2003-01-17 03:41pm
by Joe
The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys

Terrible. The implausibility of the plot devices make most sci-fi plot devices look perfectly reasonable by comparison.

Mr. Deeds

Aggressively unfunny.

Star Trek: Nemesis

I haven't seen this, but can you think of any good reasons not to avoid this? No? There are none.

Posted: 2003-01-17 03:44pm
by Stravo
Star Trek: Nemesis

I haven't seen this, but can you think of any good reasons not to avoid this? No? There are none.
You know what? Thats just not cool. You haven't seen the movie. neither have I, I only have word of mouth telling me that its bad but I haven't seen it yet so why say its bad? Thats just intellectually dishonest and not funny. I haven't seen Don Giovanni or Aida before but I should say those Operas suck??

For some reason that just irked me. Be honest and say it sucks AFTER seeing it. If not you just come off as some me too-er. UGH

Posted: 2003-01-17 03:47pm
by Joe
I didn't say it sucked. Just that it might be a movie you would want to avoid, based on word-of-mouth.

Posted: 2003-01-17 04:00pm
by Dalton
2001: A Space Travesty

I can honestly say this is one of the unfunniest Leslie Nielsen movies ever.

Posted: 2003-01-17 04:02pm
by Joe
Dalton wrote:2001: A Space Travesty

I can honestly say this is one of the unfunniest Leslie Nielsen movies ever.
Hmm, I rented this once and watched up until the dwarf started jumping on the bed, which was about a minute into it. I take it the movie did not improve after that.

Posted: 2003-01-17 04:06pm
by Stormbringer
Stravo wrote:
Star Trek: Nemesis

I haven't seen this, but can you think of any good reasons not to avoid this? No? There are none.
You know what? Thats just not cool. You haven't seen the movie. neither have I, I only have word of mouth telling me that its bad but I haven't seen it yet so why say its bad? Thats just intellectually dishonest and not funny. I haven't seen Don Giovanni or Aida before but I should say those Operas suck??

For some reason that just irked me. Be honest and say it sucks AFTER seeing it. If not you just come off as some me too-er. UGH
Stravo, some movies are just so universally reviled that word of mouth is enough to kill any desire to see them

Posted: 2003-01-17 04:08pm
by neoolong
Dungeons and Dragons.

Posted: 2003-01-17 04:08pm
by Frank Hipper
The Fast and the Furious. Pure unadulterated shit.

Armeggedon. AAAAAHHHHH!

Top Gun. Horrible, horrible. And if anybody wants to say anything about it, feel free. :evil:

Posted: 2003-01-17 04:14pm
by Laird
Hackers2:avoid it like Darkstar.
SW:TPM:Honestly it just well was not what I wanted it to be and so I rate it as a "Suck ass" -B movie.
Star trek 5:It just suck...thats all that need to be said.

Posted: 2003-01-17 04:15pm
by Joe
Let me draw an analogy.

I propose to you that you pierce your scrotum with a rusty nail. Now, this is something you have never done before. Many people advise you not to do this. You may know from certain past experiences that sharp objects and balls do not mix. Therefore, it is not unreasonable to infer that, based on knowledge, piercing your scrotum would not be a wise decision.

Normally I would not use this analogy, but some of the recent Star Trek movies are certainly on par with the above experience. I would naturally assume that Nemesis would be no different.

Posted: 2003-01-17 04:20pm
by Frank Hipper
Durran Korr wrote:Let me draw an analogy.

I propose to you that you pierce your scrotum with a rusty nail. Now, this is something you have never done before. Many people advise you not to do this. You may know from certain past experiences that sharp objects and balls do not mix. Therefore, it is not unreasonable to infer that, based on knowledge, piercing your scrotum would not be a wise decision.

Normally I would not use this analogy, but some of the recent Star Trek movies are certainly on par with the above experience. I would naturally assume that Nemesis would be no different.
I used to have a piercing in my scrotum. It's called a "hafada" piercing. Just wanted to see what this body piercing thang was about. No big deal. :D

Posted: 2003-01-17 04:24pm
by neoolong
Laird wrote:Hackers2:avoid it like Darkstar.
SW:TPM:Honestly it just well was not what I wanted it to be and so I rate it as a "Suck ass" -B movie.
Star trek 5:It just suck...thats all that need to be said.
Hackers 2 was Takedown(about Kevin Mitnick), right?

Posted: 2003-01-17 04:33pm
by THEHOOLIGANJEDI
Come on Guys!! You must have seen movies far worse than some of those. When I say movies to avoid I mean movies you wish you could have erased from your memory bad.

Posted: 2003-01-17 04:36pm
by 2000AD
Star Trek: Insurrection
Any Highlander movie with anything after the word Highlander in the title
Star Wars: Ep1: TPM , but only if your going to compare it to how good the origionals were.
Kevin and Perry Go Large , takes a good one joke sketch TOO far.
Titanic - the only good things are you see di-caprio die and winslet naked :D
The Postman , just don't! Unless you love reading Darkstar's rebuttals!
Judge Dredd , murders a perfectly good comic strip!
American Beauty , crap. Apart from the sexy bits
A Beautiful Mind , maybe it is but it's a sh*t film and it took best picture ahead of LoTR for some unbeleavable bullsh*t reason!


That's just a few that spring to mind. The rest have been purged from my memory for being utter shite! :evil:

Posted: 2003-01-17 04:50pm
by Frank Hipper
THEHOOLIGANJEDI wrote:Come on Guys!! You must have seen movies far worse than some of those. When I say movies to avoid I mean movies you wish you could have erased from your memory bad.
Okay, you aksed for it, so...

Solar Babies. NONONONONO!

Over the Top. Incomprehensibly stupid Sylvester Stalone vehicle.

Dragonard. A hot half naked guy in chains is normally enough to redeem a movie, but not this time.

Posted: 2003-01-17 05:00pm
by Raxmei
Red Planet: Up until now I was successful in wiping this movie from my memory. Thanks a lot. :x

Starship Troopers

Posted: 2003-01-17 06:06pm
by neoolong
Raxmei wrote:Red Planet: Up until now I was successful in wiping this movie from my memory. Thanks a lot. :x

Starship Troopers
I liked Starship Troopers. I just view the book and the movie as completely seperate things.

Posted: 2003-01-17 06:09pm
by The Dark
Frank Hipper wrote:Top Gun. Horrible, horrible. And if anybody wants to say anything about it, feel free. :evil:
Aw, c'mon. For its time it wasn't that bad. There were some great one-liners, too "I could tell you, but then I'd have to shoot you." Besides, some of the behind-the-scenes stuff is funny. The pilots actively tried to make the actors throw up, and Merlin got his callsign from the pilots because he was the wimpiest of the actors.

Worst movies?

Days of Thunder
White Fang (a much worse book-to-move translation than Starship Troopers)
Most martial arts movies (I hate watching fake martial arts. Some Seagal's OK, most of his stuff's fairly accurate).
Titanic. The one and only movie I have fallen asleep trying to finish FOUR TIMES.
Star Trek I. Pointless drivel with a weak plot and bad special effects. It's truly pathetic that it cost more than SW Episode IV.

Posted: 2003-01-17 06:09pm
by Stormbringer
neoolong wrote:
Raxmei wrote:Red Planet: Up until now I was successful in wiping this movie from my memory. Thanks a lot. :x

Starship Troopers
I liked Starship Troopers. I just view the book and the movie as completely seperate things.
Why? It seemed like the whole damn movie was designed to insult the viewer's intelligence? Nothing in it made sense except the nudity.

Posted: 2003-01-17 06:12pm
by Joe
Stormbringer wrote:
neoolong wrote:
Raxmei wrote:Red Planet: Up until now I was successful in wiping this movie from my memory. Thanks a lot. :x

Starship Troopers
I liked Starship Troopers. I just view the book and the movie as completely seperate things.
Why? It seemed like the whole damn movie was designed to insult the viewer's intelligence? Nothing in it made sense except the nudity.
Of course it was intelligence-insulting. Most propaganda is intelligence-insulting; in my opinion, Starship Troopers is a propaganda movie. But it satirizes itself.

Posted: 2003-01-17 06:13pm
by The Dark
Durran Korr wrote:
Stormbringer wrote:
neoolong wrote: I liked Starship Troopers. I just view the book and the movie as completely seperate things.
Why? It seemed like the whole damn movie was designed to insult the viewer's intelligence? Nothing in it made sense except the nudity.
Of course it was intelligence-insulting. Most propaganda is intelligence-insulting; in my opinion, Starship Troopers is a propaganda movie. But it satirizes itself.
The movie itself was horrible. The book, OTOH, is very thought-provoking about social issues. I don't agree with all of it myself, though I do agree with Heinlein's theory on the balancing of right and responsibility within society.

Posted: 2003-01-17 06:27pm
by The Yosemite Bear
Uncle Joe Shannon

Avoid any movie with all of the above: A Tilly, A Baldwin, Richard Gere, A Caradine & Produced by Corelco, it's B-movie factor would be worse then anything.