Axis of "Just as Evil"

jegs2 · Post by **jegs2** » 2003-02-10 01:28pm

SatireWire wrote:Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis of Evil," Libya, China, and Syria today announced they had formed the "Axis of Just as Evil," which they said would be way eviler than that stupid Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of in his State of the Union address.

Axis of Evil members, however, immediately dismissed the new axis as having, for starters, a really dumb name. "Right. They are Just as Evil... in their dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim Jong-il. Everybody knows we're the best evils... best at being evil... we're the best."

Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being excluded, although they conceded they did ask if they could join the Axis of Evil. "They told us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar al-Assad.

"An Axis can't have more than three countries," explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein. "This is not my rule, it's tradition. In World War II you had Germany, Italy, and Japan in the evil Axis. So you can only have three. And a secret handshake. Ours is wicked cool."

THE AXIS PANDEMIC International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil declaration was swift, as within minutes, France surrendered.

Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations rushed to gain triumvirate status in what became a game of geopolitical chairs. Cuba, Sudan, and Serbia said they had formed the Axis of Somewhat Evil, forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the Axis of Occasionally Evil, while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the Axis of Not So Much Evil Really As Just Generally Disagreeable.

With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs filling up, Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the Axis of Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host the Olympics; Canada, Mexico, and Australia formed the Axis of Nations That Are Actually Quite Nice But Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America, while Spain, Scotland, and New Zealand established the Axis of Countries That Be Allowed to Ask Sheep to Wear Lipstick.

"That's not a threat, really, just something we like to do," said Scottish Executive First Minister Jack McConnell.

While wondering if the other nations of the world weren't perhaps making fun of him, a cautious Bush granted approval for most axes, although he rejected the establishment of the Axis of Countries Whose Names End in "guay," accusing one of its members of filing a false application.

Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay, and Chadguay denied the charges. Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to join any Axis, but privately, world leaders said that's only because no one asked them.

Post by **fgalkin** » 2003-02-10 01:36pm

LoL!

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

Exonerate · Post by **Exonerate** » 2003-02-10 01:46pm

I remember seeing this elsewhere...

Captain tycho · Post by **Captain tycho** » 2003-02-10 01:47pm

Exonerate wrote:I remember seeing this elsewhere...

It was the opening sketch on SNL one time.

Pretty funny...

Col. Crackpot · Post by **Col. Crackpot** » 2003-02-10 02:32pm

Exonerate wrote:I remember seeing this elsewhere...

it's actually copyrighted material from theonion.com. the mods would be wise to delete this thread.

jegs2 · Post by **jegs2** » 2003-02-10 02:33pm

Getting raked over the coals at SB for not crediting this piece (been out of college for many years, so I generally don't think of such things unless I'm called on it). So...................

got it from a forwarded e-mail.

Datana · Post by **Datana** » 2003-02-10 02:35pm

Col. Crackpot wrote:it's actually copyrighted material from theonion.com. the mods would be wise to delete this thread.

Actually, SatireWire, not The Onion. The address is http ://www.satirewire.com/news/jan02/axis.shtml

Col. Crackpot · Post by **Col. Crackpot** » 2003-02-10 02:36pm

jegs2 wrote:Getting raked over the coals at SB for not crediting this piece (been out of college for many years, so I generally don't think of such things unless I'm called on it). So...................

got it from a forwarded e-mail.

even if you credited it, it can't be copied and posted verbatum. copyright law does however allow you to link to an original source. you can also post brief quotes, but not the whole thing.

Col. Crackpot · Post by **Col. Crackpot** » 2003-02-10 02:38pm

Datana wrote:
Col. Crackpot wrote:it's actually copyrighted material from theonion.com. the mods would be wise to delete this thread.
Actually, SatireWire, not The Onion. The address is http ://www.satirewire.com/news/jan02/axis.shtml

oops!

i was close.

Hamel · Post by **Hamel** » 2003-02-10 02:38pm

So~so~ha~ha

jegs2 · Post by **jegs2** » 2003-02-10 02:54pm

Col. Crackpot wrote:
jegs2 wrote:Getting raked over the coals at SB for not crediting this piece (been out of college for many years, so I generally don't think of such things unless I'm called on it). So...................

got it from a forwarded e-mail.
even if you credited it, it can't be copied and posted verbatum. copyright law does however allow you to link to an original source. you can also post brief quotes, but not the whole thing.

Also was unaware it was copyrighted, as it was pasted into an e-mail with no source. Kill it if you wish -- I just thought it was funny.

Col. Crackpot · Post by **Col. Crackpot** » 2003-02-10 03:12pm

jegs2 wrote:
Col. Crackpot wrote:
jegs2 wrote:Getting raked over the coals at SB for not crediting this piece (been out of college for many years, so I generally don't think of such things unless I'm called on it). So...................

got it from a forwarded e-mail.
even if you credited it, it can't be copied and posted verbatum. copyright law does however allow you to link to an original source. you can also post brief quotes, but not the whole thing.
Also was unaware it was copyrighted, as it was pasted into an e-mail with no source. Kill it if you wish -- I just thought it was funny.

i agree, it's funny. and i'm not trying to be an asshole, really i'm not. if i came across that way, i'm sorry. it's just that the forum, and Wong in particular can get into trouble if people start posting copyrighted material.

Enforcer Talen · Post by **Enforcer Talen** » 2003-02-10 03:13pm

reminds me of this site: http://www.fallingcity.com/w2iiiinc/

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-02-10 04:50pm

I edited the first message to correctly credit the author. If they were to ask us to remove it, I would naturally do so. However, it is pretty damned funny.

The Dark · Post by **The Dark** » 2003-02-10 04:52pm

Quite amusing...Chadguay...ROFL.

Sektor31 · Post by **Sektor31** » 2003-02-10 05:49pm

I thought Satirewire was abandoned?

Anyhow, rofl.

jaeger115 · Post by **jaeger115** » 2003-02-10 06:10pm

*smiles evilly*

Hey, tycho! You have the same avatar as mine! Suppose someone gets confused?

Datana · Post by **Datana** » 2003-02-10 06:12pm

Sektor31 wrote:I thought Satirewire was abandoned?

Yeah. This was posted back at the start of 2002, right after Bush's original "Axis of Evil" speech. It's become appropriate again now, though.

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2003-02-10 06:15pm

Captain tycho wrote:
Exonerate wrote:I remember seeing this elsewhere...
It was the opening sketch on SNL one time.

Pretty funny...

"Evil Kinevil is on the Axis too. That's a no-brainer. Dr. Evil makes me laugh, so he's not on."

Anyway, that article was quite funny. And I'm sure that some people envied Iraq, Iran, and North Korea because they were on the Axis of Evil. Maybe next year they'll make it.

jegs2 · Post by **jegs2** » 2003-02-10 08:01pm

Darth Wong wrote:I edited the first message to correctly credit the author. If they were to ask us to remove it, I would naturally do so. However, it is pretty damned funny.

Domo Arigoto (some Japanese lingo I picked up -- helped that it was already part of a popular Styx (copyright protected name) song