StarDestroyer.Net BBS

Is it possible I have encountered a family member of the (in)famous Dan Dan the Ninja Man?

So I just moved back to Boston from some time in Oregon. I tagged along with an old friend to a little get-together to meet some new people. About an hour into this the image I had always had in my head of Dan Dan the Ninja Man (Check the Flame section if you are not familiar) walks in. I can not stress how ridiculous he looked: a studded belt over blue jeans, a black tank top that stopped about two inches before his beltline, underneath a black T-shirt that had its' sleeves ripped off and also was about three inches too short. He was also sporting the type of glasses/goggles Major League pitchers (think Duaner Sanchez) wear with a buzz cut.

Just in case you didn't notice him entering the apartment, he immediately proceeded to the TV to yell "MMA is for fags". No one was really watching it since CSI had been on and it was muted, but he felt the need to say this about three or four times while explaining all they did was roll around on the ground with other men in their underwear. It seemed pretty obvious he wanted someone to inquire further so he could spout on but no one was biting.

Lucky me, being the new guy, I was the target of his first conversation. He asked what I did, when I replied I worked in a deli he almost immediately cut me off in explaining how I had just moved back to say he was a combat medic. This got my attention, as I have been meeting with many recruiters lately and am interested in joining, and one of the options I am looking into with the Army is SF Medic or Health Specialist. He then went into his big spiel about how his first MOS was as a Hand-to-Hand combat trainer, but he felt it was too much like boot camp 24/7 so he became a combat medic, and on and on about how much he loved the Army. I asked whether this was before or after Health Specialist and Combat Medic were joined and he said it was before (I thought they did this 2 years ago, he claimed to have done it 4 years ago).

Then he whipped out his wallet bearing the words "National Guard". He must have noted my odd reaction, so he explained that he had a kid and other commitments that meant he could not live the Active life. Turns out he loves the Army so much he heard he could help by becoming a recruiting assistant, which is what he is doing now. But apparently the Army wants him to become an SF Medic, because he already is a hand-to-hand specialist. I'm not sure where the SF Medic thing came from, I almost wonder if he felt upstaged by me bringing it up. He gave me his card and told me to call him and he could hook me up with anything I needed. I almost burst out laughing because his E-mail is (seriously) Ninja_Drex

It's not over yet, because he spent the rest of the night telling me all about his martial arts skills. You see, Drex has been training since he was four, he has earned four black belts and a Master's Degree in Jujitsu, which makes him a ninja (Not kidding, he literally said this). Is there even such a thing? Apparently training our Army and National Guard to be as efficient killers as he is was not enough ass-kicking for him, because he also regularly goes to bars with his brother, who will pick a fight and then let Drex kickass. Since no one reacted to this, he upped the ante, saying once they got into a fight with a bar full of Hell's Angels!

Several hours later, he tried to demonstrate some of his martial arts skills to me. He showed me a method for countering a punch that involved twisting someone's arm and gaining control over them by increasing pressure or straight out breaking their arm. He clearly thought this was impressive, but to me it looks like the kind of basic hand-to-hand skills you would learn in Basic. The same ones my nephew showed me when he came back from Marine Basic. When I mentioned this he went into his whole "I am a ninja" (!) rant about how if he wanted to he could rip my heart out with only his hands! And here is the creepiest part, he then stated that even if I waited up all night for him to fall asleep, it wouldn't work, because he DOESN'T SLEEP! He just does what he described as meditation that allows him to rest. How that helps his REM cycle is beyond me. Luckily enough for me, my friend was ready to bail and I escaped before he pulled out his ninja suit.

So, since this board has a large number of knowledgeable contributors I have a few questions.
1. Is there a Master's Degree in Jujitsu? Does attaining one make you a ninja?

2. Can a Guardsmen straight out of Basic become a hand-to-hand instructor?

3. Is that change of MOS (Whatever he was to Health Specialist/Combat Medic) even allowed?

4. Can a Guardsmen become an SF Medic? I thought that was limited to Active soldiers.

5. Have I met Dan-Dan the Ninja Man!?

(Edited to point the unaware how to discover who Dan Dan the Ninja Man is)

Turns out wannabe tough guys and ninja wankers are a dime a dozen? I knew at least three or four guys like dan-dan in high school; they really aren't that uncommon.

General Zod wrote:Turns out wannabe tough guys and ninja wankers are a dime a dozen? I knew at least three or four guys like dan-dan in high school; they really aren't that uncommon.

Indeed, perhaps I have just had the good luck of avoiding anyone quite this far out, or who so closely resembled my mental picture. I am still curious if anyone familiar with the Army or martial arts can confirm that the rest of his story is plausible.

I'm not the greatest expert and my knowledge is mostly theorical, but as far I know there is no master degree in Ju-jitsu (I can be wrong on this), only ten dan when you receive the black belt. Also, and I'm sure of this, there's no link between Jujitsu and ninja martial arts or philosophy. On that I can confirm he's a wanker.

I may be wrong, but asian martial arts schools typically have their own unique ranking systems that don't just happen to coincide with modern Western academic achievement titles

This claim alone sounded off, like "I have a Master's Degree in driving"

EDIT: It just occured you could've shot him down by asking what institution granted him that degree.

MarshalFoch wrote:
So, since this board has a large number of knowledgeable contributors I have a few questions.
1. Is there a Master's Degree in Jujitsu? Does attaining one make you a ninja?

No, ninjitsu is it's own discipline and they use a similar belt system to most MA's.

Edit: I took ninjitsu for a few months before I got hurt and from what my instructor told me, there is very little in the way of commonality between "ninjitsu schools" in the West, with large differences in what it is, how it should be taught and assessed.

2. Can a Guardsmen straight out of Basic become a hand-to-hand instructor?

*Note that I am a Canadian Forces Vet, not American but it's similar.

No, unarmed combat instructor is one of those course that everyone wants but only a few get and it doesn't go to a fucking private. Instructor implies that not only do you know the skill to teach it but that you have some actual leadership and instructional experience (separate course all together)

3. Is that change of MOS (Whatever he was to Health Specialist/Combat Medic) even allowed?

I don't honestly know but given his other claims, it reeks of bull shit.

4. Can a Guardsmen become an SF Medic? I thought that was limited to Active soldiers.

Pretty sure that the SF is open to any trade, from any branch as long as you can hack it.

5. Have I met Dan-Dan the Ninja Man!?

(Edited to point the unaware how to discover who Dan Dan the Ninja Man is)

Well, you've certainly met a moron and a poser to boot.

MarshalFoch wrote: So, since this board has a large number of knowledgeable contributors I have a few questions.
1. Is there a Master's Degree in Jujitsu? Does attaining one make you a ninja?

That I don't know, but I doubt it. I'm not a martial arts guy (I took a couple years of Kenpo, that was all).

2. Can a Guardsmen straight out of Basic become a hand-to-hand instructor?

No. People in regular units can volunteer to go to a hand-to-hand combat course called "Combatives" and then teach back at their units; my Reserve unit has three guys that did that. Army "Combatives" is a little bit of everything, but a lot of it focuses on wrestling since the feeling is that sooner or later all hand-to-hand fights eventually boil down to wrestling once someone gets knocked to the ground.

3. Is that change of MOS (Whatever he was to Health Specialist/Combat Medic) even allowed?

You can change MOS's and even relatively easily in some cases.

4. Can a Guardsmen become an SF Medic? I thought that was limited to Active soldiers.

Yes. There are, in fact, National Guard SF forces that get deployed regularly. There's one based out of Salt Lake City, I think, that has gone to A-stan several times.

5. Have I met Dan-Dan the Ninja Man!?

Quite possibly. My rule of thumb is, if you have to tell someone you're badass, you're not badass. Badassery is typically like an undeniable aura that is worn like a second skin-- folks either have, to varying degrees of intensity, or they don't. Strutting posers usually don't have it. The more badass a person truly is, the less, generally, they actually talk about. There's an Asian phrase, I forget what it is called, but in English it translates as "the Zen of the true/proven warrior". This boy is not Zen.

Let's see...
He says MMA is for fags, and then brags out his hand to hand combat training.
Sounds like he has sexual issues. Case in point, sounds like the type of Republican that gets caught in a public bathroom getting a male on male sex act performed.

His demonstrated combat training is at the level of basic training, but claims he was a combat instructor right out of basic, which itself requires additional training.
That's actually possible. He might of considered the additional combat instructor training part of his basic training. I doubt it, however. Anyone that's in any kind of structure organization knows the difference between entry and higher level training. The miltiary hammers it into you. You don't forget it.

He claims he could rip out a heart (physically impossible), and doesn't need to sleep (physically impossible).
Actually, that's not true. I can rip hearts out, and I don't need to sleep.
I can rip a heart out after the rib cage has been opened up and the surrounding tissue weakened.
I can go without sleep for up to 16 hours a day (most of the time). My record is 320. This is followed (and proceeded) by 8 hours of sleep. (Or in the case of the record, 18 hours. Insomnia period)

The 'Masters degree' in Jujitsu could be his way of communicating actually training in what he felt was layman's terms, but I serious doubt it. Most practitioners of martial arts I've spoken to are more then happy to explain the training and ranking system they are used to.
(Quite frankly, it's almost as common as martial arts practioners debating over which one is better)

Also, dressed the way he does, and speaking like that....

Complete and utter wanker. He might have some skills and abilities, but he's the odds are he's completely blowing them out of proportion. Either that, or he really is that good, but has serious anixety and inaddequecy issues.

He reminds me alot of one of my friends from high school, and my sisters ex-boyfriend from the same time period. (Not surprisingly, they became great friends).
Same type of claims, but more focused on law enforcement or 'pre-military' stuff (i.e cadets).

They proved to be, considerably less then what they were claiming. Numerous times.

If I can knock you out with a basic wrestling throw (peformed in a way that would be legal in the Olympics), you're not bad ass.

No. People in regular units can volunteer to go to a hand-to-hand combat course called "Combatives" and then teach back at their units; my Reserve unit has three guys that did that. Army "Combatives" is a little bit of everything, but a lot of it focuses on wrestling since the feeling is that sooner or later all hand-to-hand fights eventually boil down to wrestling once someone gets knocked to the ground.

True, but not from an E1. Those school slots are valuable to lifers who want extra shit on their record.

You can change MOS's and even relatively easily in some cases.

Hmm, I don't know. You can but only in certain instances and circumstances, like one MOS being totally low of personel. To come out of basic and turn around and change your MOS was rather rare in my day but it might be different now.

Yes. There are, in fact, National Guard SF forces that get deployed regularly. There's one based out of Salt Lake City, I think, that has gone to A-stan several times.

The Saints and Sinners?

Knife wrote:

You can change MOS's and even relatively easily in some cases.

Hmm, I don't know. You can but only in certain instances and circumstances, like one MOS being totally low of personel. To come out of basic and turn around and change your MOS was rather rare in my day but it might be different now.

In the National Guard or Reserves it's really easy-- just transfer to another unit, or move to another city and join a new unit, one with the MOS you want. The only potential fly in the ointment would be if you got a bonus for your original MOS and have not yet fulfilled the required term; then he'd have to pay it back.

But I changed MOS's a couple times by just moving to a new city, asking the local Recruiter for Guard and Reserve units in the area, picking one that sounded interesting, and showing up. Pretty soon they get you slotted for school and, provided you pass it, bingo.

Yes. There are, in fact, National Guard SF forces that get deployed regularly. There's one based out of Salt Lake City, I think, that has gone to A-stan several times.

The Saints and Sinners?

Dunno their name, but there's 2 Nat'l Guard SF units in the country. One is back in the south-east somewhere, one is in Utah. Being "National Guard" for them is a formality, really; in such a unit they get deployments and schools so much that it basically means they're almost Active Duty, I guess they just get to go home for a week at a time without having to burn up leave... I really don't know much about them. My days of wanting to be in such a unit are long, long over. I like having a real life too much.

MarshalFoch wrote:1. Is there a Master's Degree in Jujitsu?

If there is, it's most certainly from a bullshit school.

Does attaining one make you a ninja?

Hardly, for a given definition of "ninja". Assuming you at least have to study ninjutsu for that, no, because no school of jujutsu contains that. Not anything legitimate anyway.

5. Have I met Dan-Dan the Ninja Man!?

Most unlikely. He probably wouldn't claim to be a "Jujitsu Master", when he has studied (or at least apparently holds the rank of "Genin" in) Fuma-ryu Ninjutsu (which is a fraudulent form of ninjutsu, but supposedly does teach the kinds of things outlined on that hate mail page). Man, I love those PMs I have from Dan-Dan. I was checking them again now, and I found this:

The ninja man wrote:I usually don't like to go into specifics regarding my familiarity with the shinobi.

I will say that I have extensive experience with ninjutsu and its practitioners, having been in a relationship with a kunoichi.

He must have been trolling me so bad.
No one can write something like that with an honest intent to impress, right?

It should also be pointed out that, strictly speaking (and no 'that's what they want you to think' bs), Ninja have not existed for quite some time.

Practicitioners of Ninja based or inspired arts, yes, but not real Ninja.

A Ninja is now called a 'Spy'

Didn't ninja die out even before guns made the samurai obsolete?

Darth Yoshi wrote:Didn't ninja die out even before guns made the samurai obsolete?

At least they were nearly gone. You probably had some 'hold outs', but nothing serious.

Besides, Ninja were not bad-ass super-warriors. They were 'philosophized' breaking and enter artists, nothing more.

Did he threaten you with his ninja dust?

The remnants of the ninja clans got rolled up into the Kempetai, the Japanese secret police.