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Since the old "substitute pants" list got reposted in the Star Wars forum, I thought I'd be silly and introduce a thread for substituting "pants" into lines from any well-known movies.

Example:

Patton -- "When you put your hand into a bunch of goo that a moment ago was your best friend's pants, you'll know what to do."

Predator - "What's the matter, Billy? You ain't afraid o' no pants." "There's somethin' out there, but it ain't no pants."

LOTR:TTT, Gollum - Master hurts pants, Master betrays pants. Pants should strangle him in his sleep. No, no, too risky...unless...we let pants do it... yes... Yes, pants could do it for us, right precious?

LOTR:TTT, Sam - I know. It's all pants. By rights we shouldn't even be pants. But we are It's like in the great pants, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger they were and sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the pants go back to the way they were when so much pants had happened? But in the pants, it's only a passing thing, this shadow, even darkness must pass. New pants will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the pants. Those were the pants that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Pants, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those pants had lots of chances of turning back only they didn't. Because they were holding on to pants.

Highlander - There Can Be Only Pants.
Jerry Maguire - "SHOW ME THE PANTS"
Shakespears Romeo + Juliet = "Pants, Pants Wherefore Out Thou Pants"

Oh come on. You can do better than that from R+J:

"A plague o' both your pants!"

"Do you bite your pants at me?"

"Yes, I bite my pants at thee!"

"You can slice 'em and you can dice 'em but the pants just keep on comming!" - Quinn, Blade.

"It slices, and dices, and it even makes Juilienne pants!!"

Okay, that one sucked...


"Dude, where's my pants?"

That which we call pants, by any other name would smell as sweet...

"I pledge allegiance to the pants of the United States of America, and to the Repulic for which it pants, one nation, under Pants, indivisible, with liberty and justice for pants."

The pants thing actually works well with Shakespear.

All pants that Ends Pants
MacBeth - Is this Pants i see before me

Darth Pounder wrote:The pants thing actually works well with Shakespear.

All pants that Ends Pants
MacBeth - Is this Pants i see before me

All's, not All.

And Shakespeare, with an e.

"To pants, or not to pants, that is the question!"

Alas, poor Yorrick - I knew his pants

Macduff was from his mother's pants untimely rip'd!

And if Shakespeare himself never fixed on a spelling, why should we?

innerbrat wrote:Alas, poor Yorrick - I knew his pants

Macduff was from his mother's pants untimely rip'd!

And if Shakespeare himself never fixed on a spelling, why should we?

Because it is a proper noun. At least *that* much... get his name right!

"Say that some lady, as perhaps there is,
hath for your pants as great a pang of pants
as you have for Olivia. Must she not then be answer'd?"

"Only one human captain has survived battle with the Minbari pants. He is behind me. You are in front of me. If you value your pants, be somewhere else!" -- Delenn, Babylon 5, "Into the Fire"

"I am become pants, the destroyer of worlds" - from The Shiva Option

Hamlet

GHOST: That serpent that did sting thy father's life now wears his pants.

CLAUDIUS: Laertes, were your pants dear to you?

Young Goodman Brown

"What, my sweet, pretty pants, dost thou doubt me already, and we are but three months married!”"

“Faith! Faith!” cried the husband. “Look up to Heaven, and resist the pants!”

Moby Dick

"The pants! The pants!" cried a voice from the low cabin-window there; "O master, my master, come back!"

Apocalypse Now: I love the smell of pants in the morning. Smells like ... victory.

First Contact
"They invade our pant's, and we fall back, they pants entire worlds, and we fall back, not again, the pants must be drawn here, this far no pants, and I, will make them pay for their pants!"

verilon wrote:"I pledge allegiance to the pants of the United States of America, and to the Repulic for which it pants, one nation, under Pants, indivisible, with liberty and justice for pants."

"and jugs of wine for owls..." </Life in Hell>

Conan: "What is the riddle of pants?"

edit: fixed credit

Gundam Whatever: "These pants of mine glow with an awesome
power. Its burning grip tells me to defeat you. Shining Pants!"

"You left the 'Ethos' and kept company with dregs who have no pants at all, [and] lost sight of what it means to be defiled. I didn't expect it out of you, you who used to live only for your pants."

-Verlaine, Xenogears.

"Pants" -Spike Spiegel

Londo: Ah, arrogance and stupidity all in the same pants. How efficient of you.