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OLD soldier Joe Steer had the shock of his life when he opened his mail on Saturday morning to find he'd been called up to serve Queen and country . . . at the age of 80! Pensioner Joe was shell-shocked by the call-up papers which ordered him to pack up his old kit bag and prepare for frontline action in the Gulf.

But the World War II veteran quickly fired off a message to blundering MoD staff: "Who do you think you are kidding, Mr Hoon?" And he gave defence chief Geoff Hoon his marching orders for the call-up clanger that comes just as the Iraqi crisis reaches boiling point.

On Monday the bemused pensioner told Chad: "I was absolutely flabbergasted. I just couldn't believe it." The game OAP admitted he was flattered that the British Army was gunning for him and thought him fit for service but was quick to point out he walks with a stick.

"I'm ready to fight for my country again if the worst comes to the worst," he said. "I wouldn't mind adding another medal to my collection - but I don't think I would be much good in Iraq. "It's all gone a bit hi-tech nowadays, I'm used to dealing with rifles and machine guns not missiles!"

Mr Steer, who is chairman of the Rainworth branch of the Royal British Legion, called his friend Frank McPherson, who is Legion secretary, to share a chuckle about the blunder. Said 75-year-old Mr McPherson, of The Hollies, Rainworth: "We just laughed about it. I mean Joe has been getting an Army pension for years, so you would think they would know his age by now. It just shows you the silliness that's around these days. "I got a little bit worried I would be called up too, but I was in the Navy I don't think they're short of sailors!"

Mr Steer, of Sherwood Road, Rainworth, says the call-up brought memories of his own fighting days in the Second World War flooding back. The pensioner served 23 years with the 1st Battalion of the Royal Sussex Regiment from 1938 to 1961 and during that time he spent two and a half years as a prisoner of war after being captured at the battle of El Alamein.

This week he was simply shrugging his shoulders and sharing a joke about the mix- up: "I couldn't get down to the Post Office fast enough to send them back. Return to sender without a stamp. I haven't heard anything about it since."

On Monday a Ministry of Defence spokesman admitted that the gaff was most likely due to an administrative error - but said a hoax could not be ruled out. "If anyone receives a letter like this they should contact the mobilisation unit that they are referred to," he said.

ON YOUR FEET SOLIDER! Takes a whole new meaning

It's happened before. I remember reading about an old lady that was mistakingly called for duty.

I'm surprised the MoD admitted there was problem, instead of quickly mobilizing more WW2 vets and forming a unit out of them to hid the mistake.

Sounds like a film or something where old veterans are recalled, I forget the name.

Calling up an 80 year old veteran for service! WTF!!! Maybe somebody should dig up Oliver Cromwell for commanding British forces in the Gulf!

note: Oliver Cromwell commanded Parlimentary forces during the English Civil War in the 17th century.

paladin wrote:Calling up an 80 year old veteran for service! WTF!!! Maybe somebody should dig up Oliver Cromwell for commanding British forces in the Gulf!

note: Oliver Cromwell commanded Parlimentary forces during the English Civil War in the 17th century.

CROMWELL! WOOOT!

Can the Iraqi Army hold against three hundred year old British Zombies? Find out next time on Fucked Up vs. Debates!

Funniness


At least they didn't go all weird and do what Sea Skimmer suggested, about forming a unit of them.


I wonder what the US equivalent would do.

:shudder:

The US equivalent would be to raise General Patton from the dead. He would promptly call every single US commander an absolute moron who didn't know what he was doing, slap a shell-shocked soldier for being a snivelling yellow coward, and then invade China because they're a bunch of commies.

Well what do you expect?
That is what i call a seasoned and experienced soldier!
j/k.

LOL! what a shock it must be!

Vympel wrote:The US equivalent would be to raise General Patton from the dead. He would promptly call every single US commander an absolute moron who didn't know what he was doing, slap a shell-shocked soldier for being a snivelling yellow coward, and then invade China because they're a bunch of commies.

I'm not seeing the downside of number one and three

Vympel wrote:The US equivalent would be to raise General Patton from the dead. He would promptly call every single US commander an absolute moron who didn't know what he was doing, slap a shell-shocked soldier for being a snivelling yellow coward, and then invade China because they're a bunch of commies.

w00t! Let's get resurrectin' because that would be cool to see.

Sea Skimmer wrote:

Vympel wrote:The US equivalent would be to raise General Patton from the dead. He would promptly call every single US commander an absolute moron who didn't know what he was doing, slap a shell-shocked soldier for being a snivelling yellow coward, and then invade China because they're a bunch of commies.

I'm not seeing the downside of number one and three

Me neither

Well, if I could pick & choose from history, I'd divvy up my tank forces among Patton, Guderian, Rommel, Kleist... Spaatz for Air Force command; Napoleon working strategy... Caesar, maybe for theatre command... Hmmm, interesting. Halsey and Nimitz for surface fleets; Donitz for subs. Yamato for theater sea command.

M1A2's for the tank forces, LAV-25s perhaps for the Infantry... Russian Artillery and AAA... Israeli special ops for city fighting, Rhodesian Selous Scouts for jungle work. Under the command of Nguyen Giap...

I better stay away from the bay front. I might get impressed into service by a British vessel.

TrailerParkJawa wrote:I better stay away from the bay front. I might get impressed into service by a British vessel.

Guess we'll just have to have another Revolutionary War.

neoolong wrote:

TrailerParkJawa wrote:I better stay away from the bay front. I might get impressed into service by a British vessel.

Guess we'll just have to have another Revolutionary War.

On second thought, if the pay is good I might go willingly. If not, its time to man the shore batteries.

Coyote wrote:Well, if I could pick & choose from history, I'd divvy up my tank forces among Patton, Guderian, Rommel, Kleist... Spaatz for Air Force command; Napoleon working strategy... Caesar, maybe for theatre command... Hmmm, interesting. Halsey and Nimitz for surface fleets; Donitz for subs. Yamato for theater sea command.

M1A2's for the tank forces, LAV-25s perhaps for the Infantry... Russian Artillery and AAA... Israeli special ops for city fighting, Rhodesian Selous Scouts for jungle work. Under the command of Nguyen Giap...

Good Lord- it's the greatest military combination in history!

Drop Donitz for sure. His constant redirection of the U-boats to fight a tonnage war was just stupid. All that mattered what the shipping reaching the UK, and all too often he sent the boats off to other waters.

Sea Skimmer wrote:Drop Donitz for sure. His constant redirection of the U-boats to fight a tonnage war was just stupid. All that mattered what the shipping reaching the UK, and all too often he sent the boats off to other waters.

I thought it was Hitler moving all the subs away from the Atlantic?

Sea Skimmer wrote:

Vympel wrote:The US equivalent would be to raise General Patton from the dead. He would promptly call every single US commander an absolute moron who didn't know what he was doing, slap a shell-shocked soldier for being a snivelling yellow coward, and then invade China because they're a bunch of commies.

I'm not seeing the downside of number one and three

Number one has one issue, and thats the smell. reanimated corpses tend to pong a bit.

Vympel wrote:

Coyote wrote:Well, if I could pick & choose from history, I'd divvy up my tank forces among Patton, Guderian, Rommel, Kleist... Spaatz for Air Force command; Napoleon working strategy... Caesar, maybe for theatre command... Hmmm, interesting. Halsey and Nimitz for surface fleets; Donitz for subs. Yamato for theater sea command.

M1A2's for the tank forces, LAV-25s perhaps for the Infantry... Russian Artillery and AAA... Israeli special ops for city fighting, Rhodesian Selous Scouts for jungle work. Under the command of Nguyen Giap...

Good Lord- it's the greatest military combination in history!

Historys greatest combinations.
Clash of the Ego's

I wouldnt forget Manstein, Montgomery, Marlbourgh, Wellington, Nelson , Ocatavian {Ceasar Augustus} Slim etc etc, History has a lot of good generals and large ego's.

Coming soon to a war theatre near you!

Alexander...


Temujin...


Rommel...


These Generals are coming back...

FROM THE DEAD.


Night Of The Living Dead Generals
(Rated PG.)