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HemlockGrey wrote:Wait, isn't TGODing just insane munchkin shit?

MKSheppard wrote: "Sir, we're receiving an emergency distress call from Lt. Hit-Man,
Sir."

"Send a shuttle out to retrieve him." ordered ADM. Sheppard.

[Some time later, inside ADM. Sheppard's office]

"Jesus Hit-Man! What the hell happened to you?!" exclaimed Sheppard.

Hit-Man stood in the room, his cyber-implants no-longer their normal
silvery-color, but a sickening yellow color.

"Sir, Jonathan Boyd happened to me, sir."

"He did, huh?"

Sheppard got out of his seat and walked onto the bridge.

"Sensors, locate Jonathan Boyd for me."

The young officer worked his panel for a moment, then replied
with the answer.

"Sir, he appears to be in a primitive dwelling on Earth, although in
greatly reduced form."

Sheppard rubbed his hands together, and began to cackle manically.
after a few seconds, he stopped.

"I just needed to do that."

"Very well, you may begin BDZing that dwelling. I want nothing
to survive."

The massive heavy turbolasers began to thunder, sending gigatons
of force down towards Elim's apartment.

[Elim's apt.]

Jonathan Boyd's head floated over the crushed corpse of Elim.

*Finally. That mutherfuka got what he deserved for doing *this*
to me.* thought Boyd.

Suddenly, without warning, Boyd's world disappeared, to be replaced
by a bright white light.

The atoms that once made up the body of Jonathan Boyd, along with
the apartment were scattered all over the winds as the _Revenger's_
heavy turbolasers slagged the city.

(hey, you can't be *too* overcautious).

Boyd wrote: You poor fools. You think that you have defeated me, but I will return! I
will avenge this dead. You will suffer and feel pain unimaginable. You will-
<next TL barrage hits>

Jonathan slowly cam to. Detecting the TL roaring down through the
atmosphere, he had transferred his consciousness from his head into the
nearest safe computer. As it happened, this was Revenger's recreation
control system. Pained at having to endure such primitive systems, Jonathan
plotted his revenge. As America was wiped off the map (the only good deed
the Empire ever did?), as a result of continued BDZ, the crew of Revenger
gathered in the rec room to relax and discuss the day's events. Following a
short sabacc tournament, they filed into the cinema, to watch the latest
holographic offering from the propoganda division of the Empire. As the
lights dimmed, no one noticed the doors sealing themselves, preventing any
entry or exit. Suddenly the room cam alive with... the wound of music!
Unused to Earth's culture and forms of entertainment, the poor crew were
unable to prepare themselves for the shock that awaited them. Those few that
survived the movie with their sense intact swiftly fell victim to the
horrors of... Disney! Shell shocked and totally unable to resist, a thousand
crewmen listened in silence to the voice of the computer, instructing them
what to do...

The following morning, HIT-MAN awoke, revitalised by a night's sleep without
interruption by Boyd's tortures. Eyes once again glowing, he headed for the
stormtrooper training area. No sooner out the door, however, he was
intercepted by the brainwashed crew. No matter how hard he struggled, he was
at last forced to give up and was carried to the bowls of the destroyer, and
left, alone, in the interrogation chamber.

"Ss, Lieutenant, you thought you could escape?" a voice boomed around him.
HIT-MAN began sweating, nervously. It couldn't be, no one could survive a
BDZ. But it was. It was Jonathan. In the ship's computers. As a cyborg,
HIT-MAN was resistant to many attacks that would harm a human, but not
immune. Electricity arced through the cell, causing spasms throughout his
body. Gasping for breath, he tried to stand and head for the door, but
another huge charge was passed through the room. Collapsing to the floor,
drained by the vicious attack he heard a new sound. The sound of an Imperial
interrogation droid. "I have researched the ship's logs and found a rather
interesting interrogation technique known as the 'burning. I believe you are
familiar with it." HIT-MAN paled. "Standard procedure is to burn the feet
first. Unfortunately, you seem to be lacking somewhat in this department, so
we'll begin just above the legs, shall we? Or perhaps in between." There was
no mistaking the sadistic gloating in that voice. His electrical systems
fried, HIT-MAN was unable to resist as the droid turned him over and aimed
its blaster...

Even through the metre thick walls of the interrogation chamber, the screams
could be heard, the begging, the desperate pleas. In the years of his
service to the Empire, HIT-MAN had feared no one, withstood pain beyond
imagining, displayed the cruelest nature any man had been seen to have. But
now, at last, he had met his match. There was no escape. No relief. Just
pain. Boyd was everywhere, in everything. Hurting him, healing him, keeping
him alive to allow his sadistic whims to be satisfied. For the first time in
decades, HIT-MAN knew fear.

Vorlon1701 wrote:WTF is a TGOD?

The Yosemite Bear wrote:Also new to the TGOD universe.

XTGOD: The Soft Core Porn TGOD, a style of writing that exists on Star Destroyer Net's Private forums....

Shinova wrote:

The Yosemite Bear wrote:Also new to the TGOD universe.

XTGOD: The Soft Core Porn TGOD, a style of writing that exists on Star Destroyer Net's Private forums....

This wouldn't happen to be another Brotherhood of the Monkey thing, would it?

Drewcifer wrote:I believe that it was this threadfrom ASVS that started the TGOD tradition.

phongn wrote:No, it started earlier than that.

Dalton wrote:You can read one of the first TGODs ever here. Not the first time it ever happened, but the first one recorded in the Archive. It was started, oddly enough, by Jonathan Boyd (You remember Jonathan, he's a Fundamentalist Moron here and butts heads with Mike and Durandal occasionally. Still a pretty decent guy though.).

http://www.daltonator.net/fanfics/tgod/tgodorig.htm