StarDestroyer.Net BBS

If anyone has pick-up lines that they think shouldn't be used, either because they've tried them, or they believe any woman would stay away from you if you tried them, then they should post them here. Here are mine:

1. Hey, miss. If you go out with me, I'll stop humping your dog at night.
2. (To someone with coffee) Hey, do you need cream? It's all over my pants now that I've looked at you.
3. *The lyrics to "Hot in Here" by Nelly*
4. If I follow you everywhere and keep telling you stupid pick-up lines, will you go out with me? (That seems to be my case)
5. I'm having an orgasm tonight. I hope you come.

"Were you're parents retarded, because I think you're special"

Ok, time to pulls some out from the black mage.

"Hey would you look at that, my magical watch says you're not wearing panties. Whoops my bad must be an hour fast, must be an hour fast."


"I must be the King of the World, because, baby, your bow is TITANIC!"

"Call it a Sixth Sense, but I can talk to dead people. And your love life is telling me it could do with a resurection."

"Lady, are you a nuerologiest, 'cause DAMN, your body is messin' with my mind!

"I AM THE BLACK MAGE! I CASTS THE SPELLS THAT MAKES THE PEOPLES FALL DOWN!"

"Are you from Venus? Cause, baby, yer ass is outta dis world!"

"You don't happen to work at the UPS, do you? 'Cause I coulda swore I saw you checkin' out my package!"

Here's some that are common among my friends.

"Hi, I'm a spaceman, may I eject you pants?"

"The word of the day is legs, lets go over to your place and spread the word"

"Lets play armymen, I'll lay on the bed and you can blow the shit outta me."

6. Do you like tulips? Cause you can plant two on my dick.

*that is not only bad, but very rude. *

1. My bed's broken. Can I stay in yours?

2. [for presidents only] Hey, baby. Wanna take a presidential pole?

3. If you were a McDonald's hamburger, they'd call you the McBeautiful.

4. Oooo, la la! Can we Freedom Kiss?

5. If you were any hotter, you'd be on fire.

Use pick-up lines responsibly. Any successful outcome resulting from these lines is not typical. Master of Ossus does not recommend, nor condone, the use of any of these lines.

"You have any <insert your ethnic group here> in you?"

"No."

"You want some?"

Hey baby, I'm ugly, you're foul, we have something in common!

"Hey baby, I smell somethin' stinkin', and it must be you, cuz you're the shit!"

"The word of the day is legs. Spread the word."

"You know what would look good on you? Me."

"Your father must be a butcher, because it looks like someone shoved two fine hams in yo' pants."

"Erm.... do you like comic books?"

Weren't you on Jerry Springer?

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Mind if I stand here until it's safe where I farted?

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credit: http://www.funnypickuplines.net/

"If you were a dinosaur, you'd be Babeasaurus Rex!"

Rathark wrote:"If you were a dinosaur, you'd be Babeasaurus Rex!"

Isn't that a Wayne & Garth line?


anarchistbunny: I love the space man one. Very cute.

"Wanna come over to my place for pizza and sex? No? Why, don't you like pizza?"

"Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me."

"If it's true that we are what we eat, I could be you by morning."

"I'll lower my standards if you lower yours."

"I know Milk does a body good, but DAMN, how much have you been drinking?"

"Let's go play army: I lay down and you blow the hell out of me."

More as I remember them.

I personally like, "I lost my teddy bear; can I sleep with you tonight?"

So sweet and innocent and yet...not.

You say "Do you want to do a 68?" she says "What's that?" you say "You go down, and I'll owe you one."

OK here is a real one:

"The only thing your eyes haven't told me is your name."

"Well, I slept with your sister last night, can I sleep with you tonight?"

aerius wrote:"Well, I slept with your sister last night, can I sleep with you tonight?"

According to Jerry Springer, that line works!

Zaia, no, that's "If you were a President, you'd be Babraham Lincoln!"

Zoink wrote:You say "Do you want to do a 68?" she says "What's that?" you say "You go down, and I'll owe you one."

ROTFLMAO!! That's fucking classic.

Lets make like a puzzle and see if our pieces fit.

Hot Damn, I'm getting cavities just looking at choo.