Oppression Olympics 2016
Posted: 2016-06-09 12:36am
Welcome to this year's Oppression Olympics 2016 (Common Era, alternatively 1437 AH, or CCXXIV ). The contest this year is wide open as the previous years' overall gold medalist, Aisha Epstein, has taken a sabbatical along with her partner to help conceptualize the problem of universals in the form of an interpretive dance.
As per previous Olympics, the athletes will engage each in a round-robin tournament consisting of spirited one-on-one debates regarding issues such as (but not limited to) racism, sexism, ageism, ableism, classism, feminism, sizeism, and sexualism (with no hierarchy implied by the position of the previously listed issues). The winner of each debate is the athlete determined by the judges to be most oppressed due to their essential traits, and though each will receive a gold medal the overall gold medalist is the person who is determined to have won the most debates.
This year's athletes are:
Athlete #1: African-American woman, early 20s, heterosexual, cisgender, 67kg, 163cm, atheist, only child, earns $70k/year, residing in St. Louis, college education
Athlete #2: Asian-American woman, early 20s, bisexual, cisgender, 59kg, 159cm, spiritual, only child, earns $120k/year, residing near San Francisco, college education
Athlete #3: Non-White Hispanic man, late 20s, heterosexual, cisgender, 70kg, 183cm, Catholic, eldest of seven siblings, family earns $17k/year, residing near Los Angeles, no education
Athlete #4: African-American male, late 20s, heterosexual, cisgender, 88kg, 187cm, Muslim, eldest of three siblings, family earns $300k/year, residing near Aspen, college education
Athlete #5: Non-White Hispanic person, late teens, pansexual, genderqueer, 60kg, 165cm, spiritual, youngest of two siblings, family earns $150k/year, residing in Chicago, high school education
Athlete #6: White woman, late 20s, lesbian, cisgender, 85kg, 155cm, spiritual, only child, earns $42k/year, residing in Detroit, college educated
Athlete #7: Asian-American man, early 40s, homosexual, cisgendered, 76kg, 165cm, Protestant, only child, earns $140k/year, residing in Baltimore, college education, paraplegic (spinal cord injury, wheelchair usage)
Athlete #8: White man, early 20s, heterosexual, cisgender, 75kg, 176cm, Protestant, eldest of two siblings, family earns $90k/year, residing in Des Moines, high school education, born with total visual impairment
How judge ye?
As per previous Olympics, the athletes will engage each in a round-robin tournament consisting of spirited one-on-one debates regarding issues such as (but not limited to) racism, sexism, ageism, ableism, classism, feminism, sizeism, and sexualism (with no hierarchy implied by the position of the previously listed issues). The winner of each debate is the athlete determined by the judges to be most oppressed due to their essential traits, and though each will receive a gold medal the overall gold medalist is the person who is determined to have won the most debates.
This year's athletes are:
Athlete #1: African-American woman, early 20s, heterosexual, cisgender, 67kg, 163cm, atheist, only child, earns $70k/year, residing in St. Louis, college education
Athlete #2: Asian-American woman, early 20s, bisexual, cisgender, 59kg, 159cm, spiritual, only child, earns $120k/year, residing near San Francisco, college education
Athlete #3: Non-White Hispanic man, late 20s, heterosexual, cisgender, 70kg, 183cm, Catholic, eldest of seven siblings, family earns $17k/year, residing near Los Angeles, no education
Athlete #4: African-American male, late 20s, heterosexual, cisgender, 88kg, 187cm, Muslim, eldest of three siblings, family earns $300k/year, residing near Aspen, college education
Athlete #5: Non-White Hispanic person, late teens, pansexual, genderqueer, 60kg, 165cm, spiritual, youngest of two siblings, family earns $150k/year, residing in Chicago, high school education
Athlete #6: White woman, late 20s, lesbian, cisgender, 85kg, 155cm, spiritual, only child, earns $42k/year, residing in Detroit, college educated
Athlete #7: Asian-American man, early 40s, homosexual, cisgendered, 76kg, 165cm, Protestant, only child, earns $140k/year, residing in Baltimore, college education, paraplegic (spinal cord injury, wheelchair usage)
Athlete #8: White man, early 20s, heterosexual, cisgender, 75kg, 176cm, Protestant, eldest of two siblings, family earns $90k/year, residing in Des Moines, high school education, born with total visual impairment
How judge ye?