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Seriously.

My wife's birthday is this Saturday and I don't have a CLUE what to get her. I have a legitimate 'getaway' spot Friday night, when I will be able to go out shopping without raising her suspicions that I am out getting a gift (she loves surprises)...but I don't know what to get her!

She has everything she needs...practical or otherwise, so it'll have to be something that people wouldn't have ordinarily thought of - something practical yet totally superfluous to ordinary living.

And I...I...I'm STUMPED.

I recommend buying her a gift certificate for one of her favorite stores. Ah, and include a single rose with that -- women seem to love a single rose for some reason.

Get her something completely random...or make something...if you're an artist, draw her something. Alternatively, get her the album "Obsolete" by Fear Factory, one of the best albums ever. The Digipak has cars on it, feat gary numan!!!

Lagmonster wrote:Seriously.

She has everything she needs...practical or otherwise, so it'll have to be something that people wouldn't have ordinarily thought of - something practical yet totally superfluous to ordinary living.

And I...I...I'm STUMPED.

Chocolates, Roses, Jewelry....

It might be too late to set up a romantic evening out, but diner, a movie or show, dancing or just a romantic walk in the moonlight....

These are things I'd enjoy, but I don't know about your wife.

jegs2 wrote:I recommend buying her a gift certificate for one of her favorite stores. Ah, and include a single rose with that -- women seem to love a single rose for some reason.

Yes! That way you can be *sure* she gets exactly what she wants.

And make it $50 to $100 (Or whatever)

Do what I did for my mom on her last birthday.

Get a Star named after her

I'd second LadyTevar's "chocolate,Roses.jewellery" idea...

Good luck.

If a woman doesn't have me, she obviously doesn't have everything.

Whatever you do, don't do a Manchild and get her a boob job or a gigalo! (although you could recreate the first night you made love if you want)

Jewellery - her birthstone is a diamond, which can be obviously expensive. I recommmend a necklace. Sneak a peek in her box to see if she prefers gold or silver (if silver, then go for white gold, as it's nicer). Go for quality of the stone over size/ fanciness of the design.

Flowers - by no means the entire present, supplimet anything you give her with a red rose (half bloomed).

Don't get her chocolates if she's conscious about her food, though. She might feel guilty for eating them.

If you can't get a reservation at a good restaurant for dinner, cook yourself.

Red wrote:If a woman doesn't have me, she obviously doesn't have everything.

That leaves itself open to all kinds of comments.

Lagmonster: have you considered getting massage oil?

XPViking

Sudden nudity is always the best...

Seriously, I don't know much about the women, but I have to say that they love jewelry. Generally, it doesn't matter if they have a lot of jewelry--if they don't have that specific piece, they'll accept it.

A beautiful wristwatch. It's jewellery, it's functional, and it's not as cliched as earrings and necklaces.

Porn, lots of porn.

Get her some jewelry or somesuch, and offer to cook dinner that evening for her, something romantic-like.

You can tell I know alot about this.

i must confess my complete woman illiteracy before you read my advice

but, you could go for a whole romantic thing, if she has everything object wise that she could want or need, give her a wonderful memory for the future

Despitw being a loser teen who hasn't even had a girlfriend, I'd have to say some jewelery, a lot of some other thing she likes, and sex.

I'm in pretty much the same situation as Smi, but I've had a girl go out with me(not the other way), long story, may make a thread of it one day, but I'll throw in my two cents.

Chocolate covered strawberries, chocolate is an aphrodisiac in women, and this combines chocolate with a fruit, so it's not as bad as giving her straight chocolate.

Don't know if she's into the kind of thing, but you might beable to get tickets to a play or symphony, just be sure she doesn't catch you playing the GBA.

Don't get anything you could remotely take pleasure in, if you get candy, eat none of it. Thats something my dad hasn't learned in 17 years of marriage.

And ofcourse, the necessary dip into the pool of my sick and demented mind, set up a bum fight for her, nothing says love like beggers beating each other with flaming poop on a stick and broken whiskey bottles.

Get her The End of Evangelion.

It's the gift that keeps on giving.

But why stop there? Get her Schizopolis too. Both on DVD, of course.

Lagmonster wrote:Seriously.

My wife's birthday is this Saturday and I don't have a CLUE what to get her. I have a legitimate 'getaway' spot Friday night, when I will be able to go out shopping without raising her suspicions that I am out getting a gift (she loves surprises)...but I don't know what to get her!

She has everything she needs...practical or otherwise, so it'll have to be something that people wouldn't have ordinarily thought of - something practical yet totally superfluous to ordinary living.

And I...I...I'm STUMPED.

Then don't get her something material. Go to Mario Tricoci or a place like that and get her a voucher for a spa day. She'll go nuts for that. Women love being pampered by gay guys for a day.

XaLEv wrote:Get her The End of Evangelion.

It's the gift that keeps on giving.

...bouts of insanity.

Lagmonster wrote:She has everything she needs...practical or otherwise, so it'll have to be something that people wouldn't have ordinarily thought of - something practical yet totally superfluous to ordinary living.

Well then, the obvious solution is to get her something she doesn't need or/and want. Like chlamydia. Or a puppy.

Lagmonster wrote:Seriously.

My wife's birthday is this Saturday and I don't have a CLUE what to get her. I have a legitimate 'getaway' spot Friday night, when I will be able to go out shopping without raising her suspicions that I am out getting a gift (she loves surprises)...but I don't know what to get her!

She has everything she needs...practical or otherwise, so it'll have to be something that people wouldn't have ordinarily thought of - something practical yet totally superfluous to ordinary living.

And I...I...I'm STUMPED.

Get her a new car.

I say plan a whole romantic day, with flowers, candy, and a nice dinner at the end. Nothing beats plain romanticism.

XaLEv wrote:Get her The End of Evangelion.

It's the gift that keeps on giving.

But not the most romantic gift, perhaps...?

A trip to the Easter Islands

Right.

I'm going with a mix of Durandal and LadyTevar on this one. A spa day as the present followed by an evening out at a restaurant and dinner theatre show, topped off with a suite at the Chateau Laurier and a stream of room-service-provided ice cream sundaes the size of small mammals. That should reduce my credit card to a small pile of screaming, smouldering plastic and thus, make her very happy considering how thrifty we normally are. Pity the Summer In The Park symphonies don't start until July...

Thanks to everyone who suggested something, including the truly mind-bogglingly odd or extravagant ones.