Weirdest Hospital Visits

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2003-05-25 01:24pm

I once was rushed to the emergency room on Martha's Vineyard and stayed there for two days because I suffered an asthma attack shortly after the power went out in the middle of a hurricane.

j1j2j3 · Post by **j1j2j3** » 2003-05-25 01:26pm

hemorrhoids, after being assraped by sitting on a screwdriver someone kindly set on the ground sharpside up.

Post by **Sea Skimmer** » 2003-05-25 01:28pm

My Weirdest visit was my most recent one, in which a shove and three-foot fall put me in the hospital for six days in Houston Texas. Other then that I've avoided all but a pair of couple hour-long emergency room visits. My body seems very good are having me land so that I never break any bones regardless of the size of the rock I land on.

Post by **Dalton** » 2003-05-25 06:01pm

Long Island Jewish at 3am waiting for my sister to give birth

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2003-05-25 08:56pm

Dislocated my sholder while sleeping. Had to go to the ER at 2:00 am. Man did that suck

Kelly Antilles · Post by **Kelly Antilles** » 2003-05-25 09:00pm

I hate hospitals. Hospitals are bad. I stay as far away from them as possible.

Post by **weemadando** » 2003-05-25 09:29pm

Not one that I was there for, but its a great tale from College:

Tim is put in one bed in Casualty after having his nose broken by a bouncer, as the nurse is taking down his details someone from the next stall goes: "Tim, is that you?" It turns out that in the next stall is Oz with some other ailment, then from further along: "Hey guys, its Brad here!" Brad being there after getting hit by a car...

The moral of the tale - if you can't fill at least one hospital ER then it wasn't a good pub crawl.

darthdavid · Post by **darthdavid** » 2003-05-25 09:33pm

Sewing needle threw foot, blunt end first, string and all. Really not very fun.

aphexmonster · Post by **aphexmonster** » 2003-05-25 10:27pm

Kelly Antilles wrote:I hate hospitals. Hospitals are bad. I stay as far away from them as possible.

Is it the needles ?

the strange doctors ?

the wack jobs they keep subdued ?

or is it all the zombies and biochemical weapons they hold in the basement ?

Kelly Antilles · Post by **Kelly Antilles** » 2003-05-25 10:32pm

aphexmonster wrote: Is it the needles ?

the strange doctors ?

the wack jobs they keep subdued ?

or is it all the zombies and biochemical weapons they hold in the basement ?

honestly, it's the fact that all of my grandparents and my father were in the hospital either when or shortly before they passed away. I spent many a day in the lobby of ICU when I was little.

And I'm needlephobic. Which is really strange after I worked for a company that made IV's and such. I checked the needles to make sure they weren't too long.

aphexmonster · Post by **aphexmonster** » 2003-05-25 10:35pm

thats shitty

... bad memories associated with shit is always unruling.

... but on the bright side it didn't sound like you minded the zombies, so you're not a zomophobe!

J · Post by J » 2003-05-25 10:40pm

As part of an asthma test the doctors put me on a treadmill to do a VO2 Max test...and then they refused to believe the results. I had something like 80mL/kg/min which is ludicrously high considering that 60 & above is considered to be Olympic athlete level. And so they checked all the machines and made me do the test again...and I got the same result...and then I dropped dead from exhaustion.

For those not familiar with a VO2 Max test, they basically put you on a treadmill and keep cranking up the speed until you drop while measuring your oxygen consumption, it's tiring to say the least and I had to do the darn thing twice!

Kelly Antilles · Post by **Kelly Antilles** » 2003-05-25 10:42pm

jmac wrote:As part of an asthma test the doctors put me on a treadmill to do a VO2 Max test...and then they refused to believe the results. I had something like 80mL/kg/min which is ludicrously high considering that 60 & above is considered to be Olympic athlete level. And so they checked all the machines and made me do the test again...and I got the same result...and then I dropped dead from exhaustion.

For those not familiar with a VO2 Max test, they basically put you on a treadmill and keep cranking up the speed until you drop while measuring your oxygen consumption, it's tiring to say the least and I had to do the darn thing twice!

Yikes! No wonder you passed out. That much oxygen getting to your brain in that short amount of time...

J · Post by J » 2003-05-25 10:57pm

Kelly Antilles wrote:Yikes! No wonder you passed out. That much oxygen getting to your brain in that short amount of time...

Actually it was the lack of oxygen that had me feeling faint after the 2nd time through the test. The thing is I'm not that exceptional of an athlete, at least not as good as those results would have one believe, top 10 in Canada and getting all American honors (a Canadian getting All Americans? whoa...) was the best I managed. I was hoping to make it on the 2000 Canadian Olympic team but that didn't quite work out and I missed the cutoff by a fair bit in the olympic trials. I'm not sure how that sidenote happened (subconscious urge to brag? boredom?) but anyways...

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2003-05-25 11:30pm

Morphine is fun...very fun...and the hospital gave me a rather generous dosage when I went in for a blown shoulder and bruised ribs. Giddy-up!

Mutant Headcrab · Post by **Mutant Headcrab** » 2003-05-26 12:02am

Hmmm...there was one time while I was at the cancer ward at my hospital. A friend of mine, who i met at the ward had gone missing. None of the nurses of the doctors could find him. An hour or two later, one of the doctors comes back up to the floor with my friend. Apparently he had snuck off to a nearby SubWay, IV pole and all, to get some "damn decent food" as he so mildly put it.

Then there was the time I had first gone to my clonic for treatment. The nurse comes in calls for him for some kind of shot. He stands up and drops his pants right there. All I can say is thank God for boxers.

Howedar · Post by **Howedar** » 2003-05-26 02:21am

Once I stubbed my big toe really badly and the toenail dug into the flesh of my toe. Once I slipped and hit my head on a doorjamb, requiring 3-4 stitches. These have been my only hospital visits (although I've gone to hospitals to visit others on occasion).

Captain tycho · Post by **Captain tycho** » 2003-05-26 02:30am

Well, my arm got pratically torn off after it got stuck in a subway door in Wellington when I was 15...that was sure fun. It was hanging onto my shoulder by a thread. It hurt so bad I passed out from the pain and woke up just before the ambulance unloaded me.

Tsyroc · Post by **Tsyroc** » 2003-05-26 02:31am

Kelly Antilles wrote:I hate hospitals. Hospitals are bad. I stay as far away from them as possible.

Agreed.

Of course I still have to go to work in one.

Post by **Beowulf** » 2003-05-26 02:41am

This would be my last hospital trip where I was giggling, even though I had a 4 inch long gash in my head.