Oh boy are some people wierd

Johonebesus · Post by **Johonebesus** » 2003-06-25 07:31pm

Alright, I was searching for a specific bit of information, and one site that Google brought up was some slash site. Among the pairings were Legolas and Smaug, Legolas and the balrog, and Elrond and Gollum.

Anarchist Bunny · Post by **Anarchist Bunny** » 2003-06-25 07:39pm

Yeah, 80% of the people on the internet are scum. Although the Harry Potter/Malfoy was really the worse I seen(not read).

Saurencaerthai · Post by **Saurencaerthai** » 2003-06-25 11:00pm

I once was among friends and brought up an idea for a slashfic that COULDN'T possibly exist: Ent slash.

We searched.

Legolas/Ent

::SHUDDER::

Johonebesus · Post by **Johonebesus** » 2003-06-26 12:14am

Saurencaerthai wrote: Legolas/Ent

::SHUDDER::

Well, it has a certain logic: elves love trees. At least it might be physically possible.* How could Smaug and Legolas even go at it? I mean, I can understand Legolas and Aragorn, especially if you're imagining Bloom, or even Frodo, Wood is kind of cute, but Elrond and Gollum? That has to tie with Yoda as the most disgusting thing I have ever seen.

*I once got into a discussion about male sexuality with a friend, and I started to say that teenage boys could have sex with any human body, but then on thinking about it changed it to any warm body, then to any warm thing, then to anything that wouldn't hurt. I even suggested that some guys would use a knothole if it occurred to them.

SirNitram · Post by **SirNitram** » 2003-06-26 12:22am

I feel the urge to quote from the Homecoming Saga:

A man can have sex with anything that holds still long enough and doesn't bite too hard.

Said by the one member of the would-be colony, when he reveals to his chosen mate that he's gay..

Frank Hipper · Post by **Frank Hipper** » 2003-06-26 12:39am

Alice Cooper has bragged about fucking jelly donuts before.

StarshipTitanic · Post by **StarshipTitanic** » 2003-06-26 12:46am

I must say that Harry Potter slash is quite entertaining, but not in the way they intended.

Where can I find this Ent slash? Could be a funny (or forever life-altering) read...

Saurencaerthai · Post by **Saurencaerthai** » 2003-06-26 01:23am

Johonebesus wrote: Well, it has a certain logic: elves love trees.
[/size]

First off, I don't think Legolas was sticking anything anywhere, it was the other way around. Second, it is just one of those combinations that should NEVER have happend....

Post by **Coyote** » 2003-06-26 01:29am

Eeewww......

Rectal splinters!

......aaahhhrr! Hot sap!

................bark chafing...........!

Yiks.

Dillon · Post by **Dillon** » 2003-06-26 03:47am

What is a "slashfic"?

Based on people's responses, do I want to know?

CaptainChewbacca · Post by **CaptainChewbacca** » 2003-06-26 04:01am

I recall in a Darwin award that a man died when he ejaculated on the belt sander he was having sex with and it shorted out. So I guess even if it bites, its ok, as long as it bites AFTERWARDS.

"Slashfic" is when people write stories with characters having sex.

DPDarkPrimus · Post by **DPDarkPrimus** » 2003-06-26 04:12am

Slashfics are also homosexual in nature, almost always a male/male pairing. They are written by disturbed fangirls with strange fetishes.

Jawawithagun · Post by **Jawawithagun** » 2003-06-26 04:39am

Basically the name stems from the way these fics are labeled - Name-Slash-Name. Title etc is secondary, the pairing is what's important.

And no, Primus, they have expanded into heterosexual fields. And the male/male pairing doesn't hold true anymore either. Especially Buffy Slash sites are almost 50% lesbian by now

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-06-26 05:09am

Here's a MST3King of a Star Wars slash fanfic.

http://www.daltonator.net/fanfics/mist/ ... st3k10.txt

Jawawithagun wrote:Especially Buffy Slash sites are almost 50% lesbian by now

Let me guess - most of them involve Willow?

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2003-06-26 05:38am

A comedic genius wrote:>she had ever seen.
>Her eyes fell between his legs,

ISARD: But she couldn't pick them up again because she couldn't see without
them, so she groped around blindly. Finally feeling something like an eyeball,
she squeezed... and a bloodcurdling scream ripped through the quarters.

In all seriousness, I actually fell of my chair at that one...

Gil Hamilton · Post by **Gil Hamilton** » 2003-06-26 07:52am

Ah, slash fanfics... proof that fangirls are even freakier than fanboys. It's funny, like 90% of all yaoi and shounen-ai and slash stuff I've ever heard of has been made by straight women.

Jawawithagun · Post by **Jawawithagun** » 2003-06-26 09:03am

Simon H.Johansen wrote:
Jawawithagun wrote:Especially Buffy Slash sites are almost 50% lesbian by now
Let me guess - most of them involve Willow?

How did you guess?

*admits he's a Willowslash fan*

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-06-26 09:55am

Jawawithagun wrote:
Simon H.Johansen wrote:
Jawawithagun wrote:Especially Buffy Slash sites are almost 50% lesbian by now
Let me guess - most of them involve Willow?
How did you guess?

*admits he's a Willowslash fan*

Most Buffy fans consider Willow to be the hottest of the women on "Buffy". When putting Willow's sexual orientation into the equation, it doesn't take a genius to figure out that Willow simply begs for inclusion in a slashfic.

Not that this is a bad thing.