StarDestroyer.Net BBS

After reading that vodka thread i thought it had to be done...come on lets hear some funny drunk stories. theres gotta be some.

How long do you have?

Oh I have a jem...

After consuming a shitload of Mikes hard lemonade/resberry lemonade and other assorted liqours after prom...

Well a few of us strted to get a little sleepy at around 4 am. Now, my friend Russell, insomniac that he is, resents having people fall asleep anywhere near him, and this nigt was no exception.

He had... a sharpie and a sick twisted mind...

Well I dozed off for all of 30 seconds and he was in the middle of writing "I eat pussy" on my leg, when I woke up.

Then I noticed that our friend Jack was fast asleep. And notified him.

Jack had taken his shirt off after prom

So Russell and I decided to write awful horrible things on his ENTIRE body.

By the end of our 15 min writing spree(we intentionally woke him up after this) he had...

A hammer and cycle on his neck

"Lizard" Written on his forehead

A giant Penis on his shoulder

A swastika on his shoulder...

"Ben's Bitch" Written on his cheeck

"Ben was here" written on various spots

" will someone please getthis chicken out of my ass" On his back

As well as other horrible horrible things.... He couldnt get this stuff off of him for a week...

aly, i think you showed us PICTURES

No... I still need to get those developed...

But I would not broadcast those... or would I?

course you would.

Nothings like wakeing up full of marker and wondering how you ended up three floors down from where you started drinking. Damn everclear

Last years CART race in Montreal saw a few friends and myself get very tanked (what else do you do at a car race? ). After a late night at the bars we returned to the hotel room to find another of friends trying to sweet talk this gal on the bed. As soon as we all entered the room we quickly jumped off another bed and started landing vicious WWE elbows on him (we made sure to miss the gal--because we were gentlemen of course ). They did their best to try and ignore us but there's no way a romantic couple can put up with four drunks screaming and belching. She packed up to leave, went a block down the road and after a minute she came back up to finish off a few more drinks! Now that's a fun gal!

This one time, at band camp...

Oh, wrong thread...

My last heavy drinking experience as Sunday night, when the girlfriend ditched me.

When i was 19 i worked for the Northern Ireland Civil Service one of the girls i worked with was selling up and moving to Canada. TO say fare well we made Vodka Jelly/o and Vodka Mellon. We started in the office at 9.00 that morning. We had dinner reservations for 8 that night. After drinking 2 bars dry we moved to the place where our dinner was to be held. We got in new drinks. No one told me you blew the flame of a Sambuka out so i necked it still aflame and set my snotril hair on fire.

When I was a freshman at University our class(? - what do you call people all studying the same major anyway?) had a party at the beach. Everyone was drunk - me most of all.

It was about 3AM and I called my GF, on getting no answer I was seen trying more than 10 times, afterwhich somebody answered. I kept saying hello but I got no response which prompted me to start swearing like a madman for answering but not speaking.

It turned out to be my GF's dad who after hearing his daughters cellphone ring for more than 30 minutes got up to see what SOB would call his daughter non-stop in the middle of the night.

Well, the swearing part was okay and I was about to hangup when my friend, out of the kindness of his heart snatched the phone from my hand and said "I'm really sorry, XXX(me) is really drunk and won't be bothering you anymore". If he didn't refer to me by name, I would have gotten away with it, and my GF's dad wouldn't have anyone to blame.

Another Marker Rape story for you, and guess what it also involves Everclear!

Anyway, this was on April 20th last year, so of course one of my friends decides she's going to have a hairy buffalo party. I hope everyone understands why you must have a party on that date.

Anyway two of my friends get there early (about 4) and immediatly start drinking, alot, by the time I get there (about 7) both of them are drunker then shit and stumbling around spilling all over themselves and basically being unbeliavably drunk.

Well anyway at around midnight one of them passes out on a chair in the middle of the family room. And by this time it's a good size party about twenty people are over at the house.

Anyway as everyone knows you can't pass out in the middle of a party and not expect to get fucked with. Eventually someone yells, "where's marker," and it's on.

Both of his eyelids and ears are completely blacked in. Multiple penises are covering his legs arms and face, as well as every type of drunk comment people could think of to write on his body. And every aspiring artist in the house also felt the need to add a personal touch.

Somehow he sleeps through this entire thing with no idea whats going on. He later wakes up at three or so (still drunk) and somewhat realizes whats happened, so he trys to start a fight with the person closest to him. But he's so drunk it's broken up before anything could start. He then wanders off and ends up getting locked outside (he locked himself out). He then comes back in passes out again and doesn't wake up till the morning.

I could still find marker on him up to four days after this.

there's also my whiskey story, but I'll hold out on that one. That ones about me:oops: