StarDestroyer.Net BBS

Not my creation, but amusing..


Communist Message Board: Everyone e-mails their posts to a central committee, which posts to the board the ones it thinks everyone needs.

Anarcho-syndicalist board: people take it in turns to be moderator for a day.

Democratic republic board: The people all elect a moderator, who reveals himself to be an evil tyrant once elected.

Fully democratic message board: The people all have to vote on decisions that a moderator would normally make. This means it takes three weeks to ban the guy who sets up an automated gibberish posting program.

Fascist message board: One moderator has supreme power. Everyone posts whatever he tells them to or is banned

Nazi message board: Like the Fascist board, but an incorrect post gets you 'terminated'.

Socialist message board: If you make more than two posts in a day, your extra posts are deleted and given to the people who didn't make any.

Capitalist message board: whoever makes the most posts gets to be moderator. This turns bad when the guy who has an automated posting program arrives.

Message boards run by American political parties:

Democrat message board: All the fast typists have their fingers broken so they don't make the slow typists feel inadequate.

Republican Board: Only accessible to those with a 256k link, because the corporate sponsors put seventy banner ads on each page.

Ralph Nader's message board: Won't be online until they figure out how to run a message board without using electricity.

Pat Buchanan message board: Doesn't exist on the internet. Each participant prays for their posts to be be written on the sky in letters of fire.

Australian Politics Special:

Liberal message board: to gain membership, you have to apply to the moderator and wait for a year until he lets you in. Aside from that, copies whichever American political party message board is the most popular.

Labour message board: exactly like the Liberal party board, but pretends to be different.

Democrats message board: the posters spend all their time bitching about the Liberal and Labour message boards. The moderator leaves for another message board because this one's too small.

Greens message board: Contains a wonderfully inspiring greeting message, but doesn't function.

To add to the Australian section:

One Nation message board: Bans you if you post on any other message board, or show evidence of having 1: a vaguely adult vocabulary or 2: anything above a junior high school education. May have moderators who secretly post on other message boards, but then the rules don't apply to the preachers, do they? The administrator may also accept dozens of MBs of free disk space from sites that aren't supposed to have free disk space, even though she herself has slammed down heavily on common website owners who try to scrounge up a measily few KBs of free disk space illegaly. Would deny any involvement with the Fascist or Nazi message boards. Staff and regulars may also frequently post ludicrous claims that they cannot back up with any facts or evidence ... hmmmm ...

Festival of Light Party message board: Message boards are a sinful pleasure that must be suppressed. Too many of our members have been tempted to view online porn, and we condemn you for putting such ideas and images into our minds.

Green Socialist message board: Message boards are a Western bourgeois self indulgence. Go and take your dog for a walk in the country instead. No, scratch that. Dogs (and cats) are pests and a threat to the native fauna. Go and take your pet wombat for a walk in the country instead. I mean, they're vegetarian, just as nature intended. None of this unnatural meat eating will be tolerated under our regime. Feed your cats and dogs grass while they're waiting for their operations.

Or, on the "Pat Buchanan Message Board": It sill doesn't exist on the internet, but instead, consists of a backwoods shack where all 345 rednecks that voted for Buchanan come stuffed into one pickup truck and discuss Fundie stuff. Forums consist of the "Anti-Jew Forum", the "Anti-Gay Forum", the "America is Evil Forum", and the "Country Music Froum", each in seperate rooms.

Hey, you didn't say it had to be funny! And, didn't you get this idea off of me from my post on your thread celebreating your 1000 posts?

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi wrote:Or, on the "Pat Buchanan Message Board": It sill doesn't exist on the internet, but instead, consists of a backwoods shack where all 345 rednecks that voted for Buchanan come stuffed into one pickup truck and discuss Fundie stuff. Forums consist of the "Anti-Jew Forum", the "Anti-Gay Forum", the "America is Evil Forum", and the "Country Music Froum", each in seperate rooms.

Hey, you didn't say it had to be funny! And, didn't you get this idea off of me from my post on your thread celebreating your 1000 posts?

No, What I copied this from is about eight months old, and not my creation.