an air force joke!

[Col. Crackpot]

a friend of my wife is a USAF Lt. an he just returned from a 6 month vacation to the sandy beaches of Saudi Arabia. He brought back this gem:

An army PFC is sitting in his Abrams rolling across the desert. it is 120 degrees. sand is blowing everywhere. small arms fire ricochets off his tank. RPG's expode on its side. He curses "This fucking sucks!"

A Marine Sergant runs through clouds of blowing sand, drops to his knee raises an anti-tank missile to his shoulder and fires sending a rusty t-72 to its overdue date with the scrapyard. A mortar explodes to his left and he takes shrapnel to his arm. he falls to the ground and exclaims "Make it suck more!"

100 miles away a Navy Commander looks through her binoculars towards shore and sees nothing but swirling sand and an occasional flash. She thinks to herself "Damn, that's gotta suck!"

1500 miles away at an Air Force command center a group of off-duty airmen visit the rec room after their first shift of duty. After a lunch of grilled chicken sandwiches and fresh fruit they turn on the television. "What?!?! No cable! This fucking sucks!"

[Brother-Captain Gaius]

Hahahaha.

[Xenophobe3691]

GROAN

[RogueIce]

Damn Chair Force...

[kojikun]

Ahh my lovely Air Force. We may be damn lazy bastards, but they've got more goodies (and clearly more brains ) then everyone else.

[YT300000]

WHAT!! WE HAVE TO PAY FOR COFFEE NOW!! This fucking sucks!

[Einhander Sn0m4n]

Just wait till Wicked Pilot sees this thread. Then we'll all be making like the army PFC...

[Gandalf]

Heh heh heh.

[Nathan F]

Ahh my lovely Air Force. We may be damn lazy bastards, but they've got more goodies (and clearly more brains ) then everyone else.

Amen!

Go AF!

[EmperorMing]

Seen a bunch like that. I'll have to find the other varients somewhere's.

[Shadowhawk]

Two somewhat more classic versions:


Army Recruits in a cold muddy foxhole:
"This sucks!"

Army Infantry in a cold muddy foxhole:
"I kind of like the way this sucks!"

Airborne Rangers (with earned black berets)crawling through the cold mud:
"I love the way this sucks!"

Army Special Forces (with earned green berets), crawling through the cold mud:
"I wish this could suck some more!"

Air Force, flying overhead looking down, out of his cockpit from 20,000 feet:
"Man, it looks like it sucks down there!"



Sh*t: Through the eyes of the Military

*An Army grunt stands in the rain with a 35 pound pack on his back,
15 lb. weapon in hand, after having marched 12 miles, and says, "This is sh*t!"

*A Marine stands in the rain with a 45 lb. pack on his back, weapon in
hand, after having jumped from an airplane and marched 18 miles, and
says with a smile, "This is good sh*t!"

*A Navy SEAL lies in the mud, 55 LB pack on his back, weapon in hand,
after swimming 10 miles to shore, crawling through a swamp and marching
25 miles at night past the enemy positions, says with a grin, "This really is great sh*t."

*An Airborne Ranger, up to his nose in the stinking, bug-infested mud of a swamp
with a 65 LB pack on his back and a weapon in both hands after jumping from
an aircraft at high altitude, into the ocean, swimming 12 miles to the shore,
killing several alligators to enter the swamp, then crawling 30 miles through the
brush to assault an enemy camp, says, "I love this sh*t."

*The Air Force NCO sits in an easy chair in an air conditioned, carpeted office
and says, "My e-mail's out? What kind of sh*t is this?"

[weemadando]

A joke told to me by a friend, which he got from a friend who's a RAAF Field Security officer.

In the Army, they put 80kg of gear on your back, hand you a rifle and send you off towards the enemy.
In the Navy, they give you a year of technical training, put you in a big shiny, floating, metal, target and send you off towards the enemy.
In the Airforce, we put our officers in a big, fast, shiny, flying, metal target, give them a wave and send them off towards the enemy.