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What, if anything do you keep?

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:00pm
by EmperorChrostas the Cruel
You go to a remote area for camping, you find something odd looking in an out of the way place.
You open a crate you find under the obvious hasty hiding spot.
Inside, is the following:
100k$ cash
10 fully automatic AK-47,and ammo.
10 pounds of pot, 1 kilo of coke, and a kilo of heroin.
Fake ID blanks, of various federal and state agentcies.(hundreds)
10 RPGs.
10kilos of C-4, 10 blasting caps, with timers, and remote radio detonators.(5 each)
One ominous looking device with Russian writing, a countdown timer, and the radioactive symbol written on it.

What, if anything do you keep, and why?

I am personaly going to take careful note of my location, (I carry a GPS when I hike into boonies) and dial 911 ASAP!
The temptation to take the money is great, but I will later on tell why I wouldn't touch anything past a certain point in the inspection of treasure.

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:06pm
by fgalkin
Having read the Russian writing and figuring out that the device is nothing more than an early Soviet digital alrm clock with a sticker, I take the money. :D

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:10pm
by Spanky The Dolphin
I wouldn't take anything and call the police and/or the FBI.

All that stuff together don't sound too good, y'know? :)

EDIT: besides, could end up with a reward. :)

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:12pm
by Sir Sirius
If the ominous looking device wasn't in there I'd take the money and the ammo and use the C-4 to blow place up, but with the device there it get's more complicated...

I think I's take the money and anonimously tell the cops where the stash is... send them an E-mail from a newly created free-mail account using the computer of some library or something. A hundred thousand is just too damn tempting.

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:15pm
by EmperorChrostas the Cruel
Fgalkin

You have the advantage of reading what it is. Assume then it says; "nuclear ordinance" and has direction for arming.
and yes, if I new it wasn't like Chernobl gold, I'd keep the money.
More to the point, do you tell the authorities about the shit you left behind?

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:18pm
by zombie84
why would anyone need weapons??

i'd definitly keep the cash. Then maybe place an annonymous phone call to the police to tell them about the weapons cache.

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:21pm
by neoolong
The cash could be traceable. You could be in deep shit if you try to use it.

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:27pm
by Exonerate
Since they left all that stuff behind, it's most likely they'll be coming back... Make note of the location and run away quickly :P

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:35pm
by Xenophobe3691
Take everything but the coke, heroin, and nuke. Mark the location, go home, drop everything off, get Fred (an Iraqi) to come with me, paint some arabic on the bomb meaning "WARNING: Radioactive!" and alert the police. Mwahahaha, Al Qaeda gets bombed again, and I get a pound of weed and enough weapons to take over France.

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:36pm
by EmperorChrostas the Cruel
If you take the high road, there might be a book deal in there somewhere!
Spanky is thinking most like me.
The windfall seems to have too much "the monkey's paw" factor.

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:39pm
by neoolong
Hmmm. What if somebody else finds it between you leaving and trying to get the police.

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:42pm
by Xenophobe3691
neoolong wrote:Hmmm. What if somebody else finds it between you leaving and trying to get the police.
Hence why I took all the stuff before painting the warnings and instructions in Arabic and tipping off the FBI. Best part is, I get paid as an informant! MORE MONEY FOR ME!

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:43pm
by EmperorChrostas the Cruel
This gets stickier the deeper you think about it, doesn't it?

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:47pm
by HemlockGrey
I take half the money and phone the Feds.

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:49pm
by Sea Skimmer
Are gloves among my camping equipment?

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:50pm
by neoolong
Vorlon1701 wrote:
neoolong wrote:Hmmm. What if somebody else finds it between you leaving and trying to get the police.
Hence why I took all the stuff before painting the warnings and instructions in Arabic and tipping off the FBI. Best part is, I get paid as an informant! MORE MONEY FOR ME!
Yeah, but hopefully some moron doesn't take the nuke or whatever it is.

Posted: 2003-09-04 08:52pm
by Nova Andromeda
--As a good little american patriot I call the department of home land security.....

Posted: 2003-09-04 09:12pm
by Howedar
I'd call the FBI and not touch a thing.

Posted: 2003-09-04 09:19pm
by Enigma
I'd take the money. How can it be traced if the Feds don't even know the money was there in the first place?

Simply take the cash and anonymously call the cops or the mounties. Then watch the mushroom cloud as they try to figure out why the hell is the timer counting down to zero. :D

Seriously, I'd take the cash and run. Then I'd call the authorities.

Posted: 2003-09-04 09:22pm
by Darth Garden Gnome
Maybe take the cash, maybe not. Depends on how big my balls were that day.

Posted: 2003-09-04 09:29pm
by aerius
Take the cash, take the ID's, grab a couple AK's and as much ammo as I can carry, and I think I'll grab the pot too. Stash the stuff somewhere safe and then tip off the cops. After which I use the ID's to make myself a new identity. Drop the cash in some offshore account, sell the weed to my friends for cheap while keeping some for myself, and that's about it. Set paranoia to high and as soon as anything seems fishy use the fake ID's to move to another country.

Posted: 2003-09-04 09:33pm
by Chardok
Everything stays. Except My ass. My ass leaves instantly, followed closely by the rest of my body. I'm talking Enterprise warp style, where the image stretches and the PooF! a point of light. Of course, I tell someone about it. and live the rest of my life knowing that I could have had 100k and now I don't.
Wait that sucks.
ah, what the hell, I still report it and touch NOTHING who knows, it could be a new reality show where the money is actually fake, right? And the person who DOESN'T touch the money gets like a million dollars...
Ahh, we americans obsessed by reality shows....do anything to be on one, we would.

Posted: 2003-09-04 09:53pm
by EmperorChrostas the Cruel
I didn't say the countdown timer was running, just there. I was trying to add a little uncertainty, but with clues. Fgalkin ruined that little ploy with his ability to read Russian!

Posted: 2003-09-04 09:56pm
by Stormbringer
Call the please. I'm not about to snatch any of that stuff. Though I might grab one of the AK-47s in case I have to defend myself when it's owners come back.

Posted: 2003-09-04 09:56pm
by Metatwaddle
Reality shows suck.

I'd probably just take all the money. After all, if the cops didn't know the money was there in the first place, they wouldn't be likely to find out. I guess it kind of depends on the form of the money - is it small bills, or big bills, or what? If I was extremely lucky and it was one of those "small, unmarked bills" things, I'd just take it and go (and try not to make it obvious from my car windows that my car was crammed with cash). Anything else might look suspicious.

And then, of course, I'd call the cops.

As for the weapons, I wouldn't really have any use for them, and drugs are just stupid. It would be VERY tempting to take a couple of those fake FBI ID's, though... who knows what kind of fun you and a friend could have with that?!