Why I am opposed to Conservation

Azeron · Post by **Azeron** » 2002-09-25 02:00pm

"Now how could someone be opposed to something as wholesome as conservation?" you are probably telling yourself right now. Well the reason is quite simple if you understand the "Dilemia of the Last Cookie"

The Dilemia of the Last Cookie

There is this guy, who lives in a house with his wife and kids. The Father represents the industrialized nations, is heroic stalwert charecter, the Wife represents Mother Earth, and the Kids repreasent growing nations in need of raw materials to grow big and strong, the the last cookie represents the oil stored in the planet. (The family relationship represents colonialism)

Now the Mother worked really hard slaving hard to make a batch of the finest cookies that everyone in the family loves, especially the father, since he has been enjoying these cookies all his life. His kids were too young to enjoy such scrumptious treats before now.

So throughout the day people are nibbling on this big pile of tasty cookies, grabbing handfulls at a time. Everyone is aware that the cookie pike is continously going down. A few hours later, after dinner, the Father strolls by the cookie plate and sees the last cookie. he knows that his wife ain't gonna slave over another batch for a long time, so he is going to have to settle for store bought cookies for a long time (synthetic oil) or even worse, cookie substitute like carrots (Ethynol, or electricity).

If he east the cookie, that will sustain his stomach for a while, but the kids have been be behaving as of lately and could surely use a reward.

What does he do?
reward the kids
eat the cookie

Hell someone has to eat it. It can;t stay there and look pretty.

I view conservation in the same light.

Post by **haas mark** » 2002-09-25 02:03pm

Kids are kids...they're not gonna behave for very long...

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2002-09-25 02:30pm

We must conserve cookies. The Arabs produce most of the world's cookies. They have gotton together and artifically limited the production of cookies, therefore rising the cost. As long as we want cookies, and they have most of them, we will be their bitch. If we stop wasting cookies and use them more effeciently, we are less dependent on the cookie-nations, and have less incentive to put up with their bullshit. It is always possible to get more cookies from other places like Alaska, Russia, South America, and offshore, and we should do that. We can also develop new dessert snacks like brownies, lessening our dependency on cookies. But until we get cookies from other sources, or develop brownies, we must conserve the cookies.

Azeron · Post by **Azeron** » 2002-09-25 02:31pm

you are thinking too much into this analogy.

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2002-09-25 02:38pm

I'm a man who loves his cookies.

Ummmmm....Cookies

Post by **Mr Bean** » 2002-09-25 02:52pm

I think I'll abuse this thread abit ,but hey its a funny pic

Vertigo1 · Post by **Vertigo1** » 2002-09-25 03:28pm

Might as well abuse it with ya Bean.

Unfunny and overly large image edited out~Mr Bean

Azeron · Post by **Azeron** » 2002-09-25 05:51pm

Hmm, Its nice to know corporate america has an "American" consoul for just about everything

Evil Jerk · Post by **Evil Jerk** » 2002-09-25 06:02pm

I always eat the last cookie, so he should eat the damn cookie.
He should offer the kids alternative energy sources, such as broccoli.
And if they don't like it, it's time for Operation Desert Spank.

Straha · Post by **Straha** » 2002-09-25 08:58pm

Ahh, this is a misrepresentation of the problem. We won't be at the last cookie for a good 200+ years from now.

Azeron · Post by **Azeron** » 2002-09-25 10:14pm

Thats just tells me we should step up our cookie consumption. Quick before someone else can eat them

Post by **Sea Skimmer** » 2002-09-25 11:14pm

Azeron wrote:Thats just tells me we should step up our cookie consumption. Quick before someone else can eat them

The cleansing Thermonuclear fire will soon rid the earth of the cookie and there voracious consumers. In the end only I shall posses sugar, secure within my web of bunkers.

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2002-09-25 11:52pm

Oh, now I'm getting confused. Is this thread about natural resources, or cookies?

victorhadin · Post by **victorhadin** » 2002-09-26 08:38am

But do the smaller, poorer regions of the planet really represent our children?

phongn · Post by **phongn** » 2002-09-26 01:53pm

victorhadin wrote:But do the smaller, poorer regions of the planet really represent our children?

No.

::eats the cookie, and gets some steak (nuclear), potato chips (coal) and a coke (gas)::

IRG CommandoJoe · Post by **IRG CommandoJoe** » 2002-09-26 02:43pm

I think fuel cells will replace oil eventually.

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2002-09-26 04:47pm

IRG CommandoJoe wrote:I think fuel cells will replace oil eventually.

Don't go off topic. Thsi thread is about cookies now! Azeron didn't do anything relting to conservation, he just told a story about cookies. Does anyone want a cookie?

The story does make sense. Saddam Hussein invaded Kuwit because he wanted cookies! I mean, I once joked about how Hussein was so fat.

Azeron · Post by **Azeron** » 2002-09-26 07:49pm

Wjat there is nothing symbloic about the story in its dipicition of the eternal struggle of man for the last tasty morsel of delighty in his easy grasp at the expense of mother earth and the under priviliages of the world,

NAHHHHH!!!!!!!! I need to get me another beer, 6 aint enough,,,,

Post by **Colonel Olrik** » 2002-09-26 07:51pm

Azeron, can I have the cookie?

Azeron · Post by **Azeron** » 2002-09-26 07:57pm

*chump chump chump* what......you want the cookie, ohh shit man, I ate the last one.... *sips his beer* Too bad man, that the struggle for life.

Post by **Colonel Olrik** » 2002-09-26 07:59pm

Bahh.. I prefer to exercise anyway. I'll just go and ride my U.S 2500$ mountain bike

Azeron · Post by **Azeron** » 2002-09-26 08:03pm

$2500 mountain bike??????? Hey buddy, I got the worlds best Fountain pen for, lets say a bargin of $500. Waddya say partner, Old Azzy boy will get you the good shit.

IRG CommandoJoe · Post by **IRG CommandoJoe** » 2002-09-26 08:05pm

Uhh....shouldn't that be your U.S. $40,000 SUV?

Post by **Colonel Olrik** » 2002-09-26 08:06pm

I cannot and will not ride a pen! No deal

And Europe Rulez

phongn · Post by **phongn** » 2002-09-26 09:07pm

Bah. I have a Cross ATX fountain pen that I got for $12 (it retails for $55)

StarDestroyer.Net BBS

Why I am opposed to Conservation

Would you eat the last cookie?

Why I am opposed to Conservation