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What was the worst awakening you had?
Today I was pulled out of a beautiful dream by a fucking cramp
At least it wasn't as bad as my worst time when I woke up with a cramp in each leg and almost couldn't move on my own and the pain oh the pain.

Charlie horse right before the alarm.....

Leg cramp

Felt like my right leg was going to tear itself in half.

With puke halfway up my throat, and the bathroom too far away, and with too many obstacles in the way to make it to the toilet in time.

Well, one morning I put my right foot down and prepared to stand on it, which was a mistake, since it had fallen asleep, and the second I tried putting any weight on it, I fell on my face like an idiot.

Oh yeah. There was the time I threw up in bed.

Then the time my throat caught on fire as three gallons of stomach acid went up my esophagus.

The worst awakening is from some telemarketer...

However, I now have the cure for that @$$!!!

Charlie horse on occasion.

However, most 'rude' awakening I ever go was the dog coming in with his extra large raw hide chew-bone (the knob on my door was broken because my sister had kicked it trying to get in after I unplugged her phone) and shaking his head near me.

WACK. Wet slobbery dog-chewed bone connects with my forehead and slides across my face.

Not a fun way to wake up.

But I got back at the dog...

He didn't get his treat that day

Solauren wrote:Charlie horse on occasion.

Dalton mentioned that too, may I ask what a Charlie horse is?

Solauren wrote:WACK. Wet slobbery dog-chewed bone connects with my forehead and slides across my face.

Not a fun way to wake up.

Something like that happened to me too and I rushed the bathroom. Sure its disgusting waking up like that but IMHO it isn't near as bad as a leg cramp.

Cramp in the foot. My toes curled under the sole of my foot, and I had to grab them and peel them back to horizontal. That was not fun.

Telemarketer call at 9:00 when I had gone to bed at 5:00. I was in a loft too, so it was annoying to get to the phone.

Gambler wrote:

Solauren wrote:Charlie horse on occasion.

Dalton mentioned that too, may I ask what a Charlie horse is?

Severe cramp in the back of the leg, just below the knee. In the calf area. I think.

In the middle of a dream, maybe an hour after having fallen alseep. I was dreaming I was in a game show, and the question was something like, "What do cats, bears, and duckbilled platapus all share in common?" Naturally, I knew this one, so in my dream, I slammed down on the buzzer and shouted, "They're all-"

"-MAMMALS!"
I jolted myself awake when I shouted the word in my dream. Ordinarily, not a problem, just go back to bed and keep sleeping, file it away for another day. But I was at a sleepaway camp...with a full nine other campers (plus two counselors in the next room) in the cabin with me. All they knew was that I suddenly shouted "MAMMALS!!" in the middle of the night, and I have a very strong voice that carries well.

Fortunately, I explained it all that morning and all was forgiven. Of course, one of the kids (he was one of the youngest in our cabin) decided to be an ass a week or two later and while we were all trying to get to sleep, he made a huge amount of fuss (flipping over and over in his bunk bed, generally making an ass of himself), and after a while, shouted out "AMPHIBIANS!!".

Needless to say, the next morning the cabin wasn't quite as understanding, and he had a much ruder awakening than I did.

And of course, I've had all of the above...foot cramps, charlie horses, my arms totally falling asleep, vomiting in the middle of the night, cricks in my neck/back, etc.

Dalton wrote:

Gambler wrote:Dalton mentioned that too, may I ask what a Charlie horse is?

Severe cramp in the back of the leg, just below the knee. In the calf area. I think.

That was what I had this morning

Severe groin pain. My GF had fallen asleep on top of me and she somehow ended up crushing my naughty parts with her hips or leg when she shifted her sleeping position.

heart burn,Nothing wakes you up ruder when you can't breathe cause the acid in your stomach has burned the inside of your throat.

Charlie horse that makes you jump out of bed (loft bed), land on that leg, fall over, and smash your head into a bookshelf almost knocking yourself out. Then sliding facefirst into a pile of Legos.

Calf cramp.

I once woke up to the sound of people murmuring in the hall outside my room. Not knowing what was going on I got up and said the first thing that came to my mind. "So who died?" It had been my grandfather.

For me it's when my dog Diasy-Du a 110lbs rottwiler/cyote cross decides that 3am is a fine time to play lap dog and jumps on my chest.

Calf cramp. Second worst was some assholes during frosh week who were trying to make everyone participate in hazing rituals where they march you through the streets and pour ice-cold water on you. I had just come back from a party and I was tired as hell, and these idiots started running around bashing trash cans and pounding on a big guitar amp at something like 3 in the morning. They barged into my room and demanded that I go on the "frosh walk" or else, so I reached into my desk, pulled out an 8" knife, and dared them to come and get me. They turned around and left the room.

Yeah, waking up with a charlie horse isn't much fun.

And although I hate to admit it...one time I had a dream I was taking a leak, and a moment later I woke up and--you guessed it, I had pissed on my sheets.

I have these really vivid nightmares where some black-cloaked shape is reaching for me while I'm lying in bed unable to move... they're always good for making me wake up panicked, totally disoriented and in a cold sweat.

Runner-up would be severe cramps in both legs while I was working retail over Christmas, or the time I woke up to a ferret licking the end of my nose.

Waking up, taking a shower.

Then waking up.

That one was a trip, the whole thing had literally been a dream.

I've had the 'pissing' dream as well. It's not good.

And then there was the time my best friend needed to puke. Not a big deal, in itself, but this is when I was in a tiny little bedroom with a double bed which, being so close to the club, people liked to kip over in.

So there's 3 girls in the bed and a man on the floor, and the girl on the far side of the bed, next to the wall, needs to puke, and has to cover all three of us with bits of it on her way out...