SB-SDN CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH RETURNS! :-)

Post by **Steve** » 2003-10-09 02:54pm

After a stroke of inspiration last night....

JG: What will happen when two newcomers try to prove they have what it takes to survive in the Deathmatch ring? Can deadly enemies team up to survive our Dome of devastation? And how much damage will an entire city suffer from three fighters in specially-powered battle-armor waging a one-on-one-on-one war for supremacy?

ND: All of those questions will be answered tonight, on CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

JG: Hello, I'm Johnny Gomez...

ND: And I'm Nick Diamond...

JG: And we'd like to welcome you to another exciting episode of CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

ND: Tonight's going to be a real slugfest, folks, as we've got three major fights lined up.

JG: Our first fight will be a battle of new blood. Newcomer Audrie Dawn will have to prove she has what it takes by defeating that bastion of misogynism, Tarl Cabot of Gor!

*arena is filled with boos*

ND: Dark Lord and Deathbringer have been rivals since they first met. Slacker and LordChaos have already faced once in this ring and managed a draw. Now, they will be forced to aid one another against the opposing team in the DOME OF DEVASTATION!

JG: And for our final matchup, we will be going live to Tokyo as we pit Laird, Big Steve, and Mike Wong against each other in deadly battle-armor combat! Each will be given a constant supply of the one substance that makes them unstoppable to any other foe as they go at it in a brawl to decide who is truly the most powerful fighter in existance! We'll have all of that and more tonight on CELEBRITY DEATHMATCH!

Fight 1: Audrie Dawn vs. Tarl Cabot
A) Audrie wins!
B) Cabot wins!
C) Interference!

Fight 2: Dark Lord and Deathbringer vs. Slacker and LordChaos
A) DL and DB win!
B) Slack and LC win!
C) Interference!
D) MAD after both teams betray each other!

Fight 3: Mike Wong vs. Big Steve vs. Laird in Tokyo
A) Mike Wong wins!
B) Big Steve wins!
C) Laird wins!
D) Interference!
E) Tokyo loses!

Note: Dark Lord now goes by Elizar at SB.

SirNitram · Post by **SirNitram** » 2003-10-09 03:02pm

1) Match is a draw when a cadre of Black Mages storm the ring and blow up both competitors, a good chunk of the ceiling, and a few bystanders.

2) MAD.

3) Tokyo always loses.

MKSheppard · Post by **MKSheppard** » 2003-10-09 03:07pm

SirNitram wrote:1) Match is a draw when a cadre of Black Mages storm the ring and blow up both competitors, a good chunk of the ceiling, and a few bystanders.

You mean C. (Interference)...

Laird · Post by **Laird** » 2003-10-09 03:31pm

as I said on SB.

1)A
2)A
3)E

Demiurge · Post by **Demiurge** » 2003-10-09 03:35pm

Tarl Cabot, MAD, and Mike Wong.

phongn · Post by **phongn** » 2003-10-09 04:59pm

Big Steve wrote:Fight 1: Audrie Dawn vs. Tarl Cabot
A) Audrie wins!
B) Cabot wins!
C) Interference!

C. If Audrie doesn't kill him in time, the entire crowd is going to lynch him from the nearest tree. Then light him afire and probably pour 12M HCl over him.

Fight 2: Dark Lord and Deathbringer vs. Slacker and LordChaos
A) DL and DB win!
B) Slack and LC win!
C) Interference!
D) MAD after both teams betray each other!

B. Fivers can't cooperate like that, what are you thinking?

Fight 3: Mike Wong vs. Big Steve vs. Laird in Tokyo
A) Mike Wong wins!
B) Big Steve wins!
C) Laird wins!
D) Interference!
E) Tokyo loses!

E. While A, B & C each have P(Win) < 1.0, P(Tokyo & Destroyed) = 1.0, P(JSDF Win) = 0.0 at all times.

darthdavid · Post by **darthdavid** » 2003-10-09 05:02pm

C
B
E (does wong get a constant stream of anal sex?)

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-10-09 06:28pm

Damn. I wanted to mudwrestle someone.

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2003-10-09 06:29pm

Zaia wrote:Damn. I wanted to mudwrestle someone.

Maybe SB could unban that one bitch of theirs.

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-10-09 06:30pm

Zaia wrote:Damn. I wanted to mudwrestle someone.

We can have you and the entire SOS mud wrestle for who's sexiest

.

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2003-10-09 06:44pm

Zaia wrote:Damn. I wanted to mudwrestle someone.

No one's stopping you. Just make sure to post the pictures in the BOTM when you're done.

CmdrWilkens · Post by **CmdrWilkens** » 2003-10-09 06:53pm

Zaia wrote:Damn. I wanted to mudwrestle someone.

I'll volunteer.

Audrie_Dawn · Post by **Audrie_Dawn** » 2003-10-09 07:13pm

Demiurge wrote:Tarl Cabot, MAD, and Mike Wong.

And how precisely does a Gorean with a sword beat a girl with a Walther P99 and no compunctions at all about gunning him down on sight?

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-10-09 07:17pm

CmdrWilkens wrote:
Zaia wrote:Damn. I wanted to mudwrestle someone.
I'll volunteer.

Yes! A challenger! You're on!!

phongn · Post by **phongn** » 2003-10-09 08:11pm

Audrie_Dawn wrote:
Demiurge wrote:Tarl Cabot, MAD, and Mike Wong.
And how precisely does a Gorean with a sword beat a girl with a Walther P99 and no compunctions at all about gunning him down on sight?

He doesn't. OTOH, you'll never have time to get that shot off because everyone armed in the crowd will have shot him first.

Post by **haas mark** » 2003-10-09 09:35pm

Hey... no insomnia challenges? [pouts]

~ver

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2003-10-09 09:36pm

verilon wrote:Hey... no insomnia challenges? [pouts]

~ver

With my habits of late, maybe we could tag-team.

Post by **haas mark** » 2003-10-09 09:37pm

Spanky The Dolphin wrote:
verilon wrote:Hey... no insomnia challenges? [pouts]

~ver
With my habits of late, maybe we could tag-team.

Actually, methinks Yuri might be a more prime candidate (no pun intended

).

~ver

LT.Hit-Man · Post by **LT.Hit-Man** » 2003-10-09 10:52pm

B)
D)
D)