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Uh, Sorry We Ate Him
Posted: 2003-10-14 01:08pm
by Admiral Valdemar
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/asia-p ... 190330.stm
Fijians say sorry to eaten Briton's family
The family of an English missionary who was eaten by Fijian tribespeople 136 years ago are to receive an apology.
According to local media, the remote village of Tui Navatusila on the Fijian island of Viti Levu has invited the descendants of the late Reverend Thomas Baker to visit next month.
Reverend Baker was killed and cooked by the people of Tui Navatusila on 21 July, 1867, after he took a comb out of a chief's hair.
It is forbidden to touch the head of a chief in Fiji.
One villager who took part in the feast was quoted in contemporary accounts as saying "we ate everything but his boots".
One of his boots is reportedly on display in the Fiji Museum.
Fiji's Prime Minister, Laisenia Qarase, is expected to attend the traditional apology.
The Fiji Village web site reported that the inhabitants of Tui Navatusila believed they were suffering from a curse because of the actions of their forefathers.
Reverend Baker is the only white man to have fallen victim to Fiji cannibals.
Cannibalism died out in Fiji in the mid-19th century with the end of warring and the acceptance of Christianity.
Riiiight...
Posted: 2003-10-14 01:11pm
by BoredShirtless
Posted: 2003-10-14 01:16pm
by Montcalm
"He tasted like chicken"
Posted: 2003-10-14 01:25pm
by El Moose Monstero
And I 'ate the mess he left on me floor... you heard me...
Posted: 2003-10-14 01:45pm
by Gil Hamilton
Mmm... long pork. Yum!
Posted: 2003-10-14 01:48pm
by neoolong
Montcalm wrote:"He tasted like chicken"
Humans aren't supposed to taste like chicken. Pork is what I heard.
Posted: 2003-10-14 01:49pm
by haas mark
Gil Hamilton wrote:Mmm... long pork. Yum!
That can be taken soooooooooo many ways.. [snickers]
~ver
Posted: 2003-10-14 01:51pm
by Admiral Valdemar
verilon wrote:Gil Hamilton wrote:Mmm... long pork. Yum!
That can be taken soooooooooo many ways.. [snickers]
~ver
*The
Spanish Inquisition storms in and hauls verilon off, kicking and screaming*
Posted: 2003-10-14 01:53pm
by haas mark
Admiral Valdemar wrote:verilon wrote:Gil Hamilton wrote:Mmm... long pork. Yum!
That can be taken soooooooooo many ways.. [snickers]
~ver
*The
Spanish Inquisition storms in and hauls verilon off, kicking and screaming*
I hate you. Just because they have pretty much everything about me to burn me at the stake...
~ver
Posted: 2003-10-14 02:41pm
by Gil Hamilton
verilon wrote:That can be taken soooooooooo many ways.. [snickers]
~ver
Of course, and while the islanders were preparing to eat long pork, they went to his chicken coop and grabbed his cock.
Posted: 2003-10-14 02:42pm
by Kuja
verilon wrote:Admiral Valdemar wrote:
*The Spanish Inquisition storms in and hauls verilon off, kicking and screaming*
I hate you. Just because they have pretty much everything about me to burn me at the stake...
~ver
*Kuja drops from the ceiling, hanging by a wire attached to his belt*
"Sorry," he says with a bad Pierce Brosnan accent, "forgot to knock." He whips out a pair of Uzis and opens fire. "GO GO GO!"
Verilon dashes out and Kuja keeps firing until all the Inquisitioners are dead. Kuja then realized he is hanging upside down in a roomful of corpses.
"Didn't think this one through," he says to himself. "Did you, Kuj?"
Posted: 2003-10-14 02:44pm
by Admiral Valdemar
Dear Sir, I am glad to hear that your studio audience disapproves of the last skit as strongly as I. As a naval officer I abhor the implication that the Royal Navy is a haven for cannibalism. It is well known that we now have the problem relatively under control, and that it is the RAF who now suffer the largest casualties in this area. And what do you think the Argylls ate in Aden. Arabs? Yours etc. Captain B.J. Smethwick in a white wine sauce with shallots, mushrooms and garlic.
-Monty Python's Flying Circus
Posted: 2003-10-14 02:47pm
by El Moose Monstero
I have yet to find anything in this life to which Monty Python cannot be attributed.
Posted: 2003-10-14 03:31pm
by Zaia
I've been to Fiji twice. Guess I just didn't look tasty enough for them.
Posted: 2003-10-14 03:32pm
by Admiral Valdemar
Zaia wrote:I've been to Fiji twice. Guess I just didn't look tasty enough for them.
I'd eat you... uh... I mean...
Damn.
Posted: 2003-10-14 03:34pm
by DPDarkPrimus
The ability to come up with wordplays for this are endless.
"We're very accepting of people of other cultures. They bring some exotic flavor into our lives."
Posted: 2003-10-14 03:41pm
by Zaia
Admiral Valdemar wrote:Zaia wrote:I've been to Fiji twice. Guess I just didn't look tasty enough for them.
I'd eat you... uh... I mean...
Damn.
Heheheh, thanks, babe, I needed to smile. *kisses AV*
Posted: 2003-10-14 04:02pm
by Admiral Valdemar
Zaia wrote:Admiral Valdemar wrote:Zaia wrote:I've been to Fiji twice. Guess I just didn't look tasty enough for them.
I'd eat you... uh... I mean...
Damn.
Heheheh, thanks, babe, I needed to smile. *kisses AV*
I'm actually concerned about them inviting the family around; seconds anyone?
Posted: 2003-10-14 04:27pm
by Peregrin Toker
Hmmm... I wonder if this encourages Trey Parker to make "Cannibal The Musical 2"....
Posted: 2003-10-14 05:22pm
by DPDarkPrimus
Admiral Valdemar wrote:Zaia wrote:I've been to Fiji twice. Guess I just didn't look tasty enough for them.
I'd eat you... uh... I mean...
Damn.
I second that motion!
Posted: 2003-10-14 05:23pm
by haas mark
DPDarkPrimus wrote:Admiral Valdemar wrote:Zaia wrote:I've been to Fiji twice. Guess I just didn't look tasty enough for them.
I'd eat you... uh... I mean...
Damn.
I second that motion!
That's just as bad as me talking to my friend Lilly via IM while I was cutting out a PSD of Dawn-Marie and telling her that I needed to clean her crotch a bit more.. _ _;;
~ver
Posted: 2003-10-14 05:24pm
by SAMAS
Admiral Valdemar wrote:verilon wrote:Gil Hamilton wrote:Mmm... long pork. Yum!
That can be taken soooooooooo many ways.. [snickers]
~ver
*The
Spanish Inquisition storms in and hauls verilon off, kicking and screaming*
Well, I didn't expect that...
Posted: 2003-10-14 05:29pm
by 2000AD
SAMAS wrote:Admiral Valdemar wrote:
*The Spanish Inquisition storms in and hauls verilon off, kicking and screaming*
Well, I didn't expect that...
No body expects the Spanish Inquisition !
(Ha beat you to it!)
Posted: 2003-10-14 05:35pm
by haas mark
2000AD wrote:SAMAS wrote:Admiral Valdemar wrote:
*The Spanish Inquisition storms in and hauls verilon off, kicking and screaming*
Well, I didn't expect that...
No body expects the Spanish Inquisition !
(Ha beat you to it!)
Firthermore, this is SD.Net. Expect everything. Especially Monty Python references.
~ver
Posted: 2003-10-14 05:49pm
by Joe
I guess this just never sat well with the Fijians. Good thing they finally expelled it from their system.
