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Dating your Friend's Ex's

Posted: 2003-11-20 06:34pm
by aerius
So I'm talking with one of my buddies today, and he's having some trouble finding a chick to go out with these days. He was telling me about the chicks from hell at his new workplace and how his quest to get laid had hit a dead end. Being the helpful guy I am I jokingly offer to set him up with one of my ex-GFs. His reaction was "yeah fuck you! I ain't sleeping with some chick you knocked up!", apparently he wasn't too happy with that idea. So we ended up talking about the ethics of sleeping with each other's ex's, which leads to this post.

I'm just curious here, what are your opinions on dating & sleeping with your friend's ex-GF/BF? Is it a good thing, is it a bad thing, does it creep you out, and would you do it? If you've done it, stories about the experiences are welcome (Stravo? :wink:).

Posted: 2003-11-20 06:49pm
by Faram
Why not?

If it's over then it's over and she is free to meet anyone.

Do your friend expect to only sleep with virgins? Othervise it's a bit hard to understand his rationale.

Posted: 2003-11-20 06:52pm
by Ghost Rider
I've done it before...but was a tad bit uncomfortable since, all she would talk about was how it was dating back with Mike(yes, that's the guy's name :P )...and how great it was, etc. Literally it felt like if I didn't do it the way Mike did it, I was essentially inferior. The worst of it was on a bad day I would here her bitch that I was a friend of Mike's and that he was a bastard.

For me...no win regardless.

So my bias...is no go. After wards and thinking things through I'm a bit hesitant just because of what was the relation between the girl and my friend and how did it turn out, and why me.

Posted: 2003-11-20 06:59pm
by Stravo
With women, no matter how skanky the slut a man has the ability to ignore the fact that there are so many cocks piled up beside her pussy that you need a traffic controller to guide them in. But when you are banging a lady who's been with your best freind or in one of my instances was my brother's ex (don't ask) You KNOW whats been there before you, our self denial abilties fail us, and it plays tricks with your mind.

So as a rule, no with women who have been with people you know.

Posted: 2003-11-20 07:26pm
by namdoolb
I'm perfectly capable of that level of self denial, that's not a problem.

The only thing would be to ok it with the friend in question before you start banging his ex. (not stricly neccessary, I know, but more of a common courtesy)

Posted: 2003-11-20 07:31pm
by neoolong
It also depends on the friend. He may be my friend, but I may not think to highly of anyone that would go out with him, let alone sleep with him.

Posted: 2003-11-20 08:36pm
by salm
no problem, as long as she´s hot.

Posted: 2003-11-20 08:48pm
by The Kernel
Subtle as always Stravo.

Moving right along, I don't think dating a friend's ex is a problem per se, but there are strict limits on how long after they break up that you can take a shot at her. Also, I think if they had been dating long-term (say more than 6 months) then it is better to just forget about it as it will always be weird and it is better not to risk a friendship for a possible relationship.

Posted: 2003-11-20 11:32pm
by aerius
Faram wrote:Do your friend expect to only sleep with virgins? Othervise it's a bit hard to understand his rationale.
No, he just doesn't want to sleep with any chick that I've slept with. I even joked that I'd trained my ex well in the ways of sex, and that I could certify that she was good in bed, but my buddy just didn't want {i]my[/i] "sloppy seconds" as he put it.

Anyways, I've done it before and I don't know if I want to do it again. In university I ended up dating and sleeping with my roomate's ex. God, I was such a man-slut back then. Despite how much I bugged my buddy about it earlier on today, I wouldn't do it myself these days.

Posted: 2003-11-20 11:40pm
by ArmorPierce
I wouldn't do it, it might cause some problems.

Posted: 2003-11-21 02:25am
by Durandal
Keep your family and your love life separate. Mixing the two is a recipe for disaster.

Posted: 2003-11-21 02:28am
by The Kernel
Durandal wrote:Keep your family and your love life separate. Mixing the two is a recipe for disaster.
For some reason the West Virginian's just can't seem to figure out this concept...

Posted: 2003-11-21 02:34am
by SirNitram
The Kernel wrote:
Durandal wrote:Keep your family and your love life separate. Mixing the two is a recipe for disaster.
For some reason the West Virginian's just can't seem to figure out this concept...
I have never met a West Virginian who is actually inbred, and I live in this state.

Now, I can't say the same for Alabama, and I've never even physically travelled there...

Posted: 2003-11-21 03:15am
by His Divine Shadow
aerius wrote:So I'm talking with one of my buddies today, and he's having some trouble finding a chick to go out with these days. He was telling me about the chicks from hell at his new workplace and how his quest to get laid had hit a dead end. Being the helpful guy I am I jokingly offer to set him up with one of my ex-GFs. His reaction was "yeah fuck you! I ain't sleeping with some chick you knocked up!", apparently he wasn't too happy with that idea. So we ended up talking about the ethics of sleeping with each other's ex's, which leads to this post.

I'm just curious here, what are your opinions on dating & sleeping with your friend's ex-GF/BF? Is it a good thing, is it a bad thing, does it creep you out, and would you do it? If you've done it, stories about the experiences are welcome (Stravo? :wink:).
Well when I met my now ex-gf she was still seeing her bf, which I didn't know about, who was also one of my friends, I didn't even know he was seeing her, anyway they broke up some weeks later and I was, "oh, she had a BF, and it was him?", she and I where ofcourse only friends during this and didn't get together until after, and IIRC he dumped her anyway.
Anyway this has not caused the slightest bit of friction between us, one might say we just got more in common now :P