Russia offering honeymoons in space

[Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi]

Link

Cosmonaughties no Mir fantasy
Russia is offering a honeymoon out of this world, writes MARK FRANCHETTI in Moscow
December 29, 2003

THEY put the first man in space, then the first tourist. Now the Russians could make one wealthy couple the first members of the 240-mile-high club.

In its latest attempt to develop space tourism, Russia is offering a pair of newlyweds the chance to swap Venice or Paris for a cosmic honeymoon on board the international space station.

For $US48 million ($65 million) - the cost of a pair of space return tickets - the couple could become the first to experience the uncharted joys of sex in zero gravity.

"It would bring the mile-high club to new heights," said Rob Volmer of Space Adventures, the company that has teamed up with the Russian Aviation and Space Agency to offer the trip.

"The international space station is as large as a football field. There are plenty of nooks and crannies where a couple could hide. If Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck want to get away from it all on their honeymoon, we have the perfect solution."

Sergei Gorbunov, of the Russian Aviation and Space Agency, said the chosen couple would have to be in good physical condition and prepared to undergo a rigorous 10-month course to train for space travel.

The pair could be blasted aloft aboard the Soyuz spacecraft that was used by Denis Tito and Mark Shuttleworth, the wealthy businessmen who paid $US25million each to become the first tourists in space.

Space Adventures and the Russian agency have signed an agreement for up to four more space tourists to go into orbit. Officials said the first newlyweds could be in space by 2006.

Sex has long been a space taboo. A US married couple spent eight days as cosmonauts on Russia's Salyut space station in 1992, but one always slept while the other worked.

But as regular stints on the international space station can last up to six months, the chances of cosmonauts becoming sexually involved have increased.

In his book Living in Space, G. Harry Stine, a NASA technician who died in 1997, wrote that agency staff at the Marshall Space Flight Centre in Huntsville, Alabama, had used a buoyancy tank that simulated low-gravity conditions to test the possibilities of weightless sex.

"It was possible but difficult," he wrote, "and was made easier when a third person assisted by holding one of the others in place."

Pierre Kohler, a French scientific writer, claimed in another book that NASA had tested 20 positions by computer simulation and then arranged for two people to try the best 10 in zero gravity.

Only four were possible to reach without "mechanical assistance", according to Kohler. An elastic belt and an inflatable tunnel, like an open-ended sleeping bag, were needed for the other six.

"One of the principal findings was that the classic so-called missionary position, which is so easy on earth when gravity pushes one downwards, is simply not possible," he wrote.

NASA denied such tests had taken place.

It is unclear whether the Russians have carried out research on sex in space. Valery Polyakov, who holds the space endurance record for a 14-month stint on the Mir station that ended in 1995, denied he had had space sex with his wife and fellow cosmonaut Yelena Kondakova.

I don't see why anyone would shell out money for that. Just about everyone can't afford it, and the people who do have the money to spare have better things to do with $48 million.

[Jaded Masses]

I don't see why anyone would shell out money for that. Just about everyone can't afford it, and the people who do have the money to spare have better things to do with $48 million.

I don't know about that. I've noticed rich people like to waste money on glimmer and crap, especially the actor variety. Any chance to show off and do something to brag about. And if the persons were in the right career the publicity may pay for it self, in the from of talk shows and books.

On the side, what is the status of gay marriage in Russia. It would be damned cool for the first space honeymoon to be homosexual, just for the shock value

[Sea Skimmer]

I don't see the US agreeing to this, and because of the escape pods limited capacity the couple couldn't stay onboard without another craft being docked as well.

[EmperorMing]

*Bad visions in my head of post-coitial goo floating around...*

Not much to do up there on a honeymoon, and they would probably get in the way of normal workflow.

[The Cleric]

$5 says Spears is the first space ho.

[EmperorMing]

$5 says Spears is the first space ho.

Didn't that one get anulled within the first 7 hours?

[The Cleric]

$5 says Spears is the first space ho.

Didn't that one get anulled within the first 7 hours?

I meant that someone is going to fly her up there and rent her for money. Ho's in space.

[Howedar]

If I had more money than God, I'd do that.

[Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi]

$5 says Spears is the first space ho.

And to make everyone happy, if she doesn't have the money, we can give her a one-way ticket for half the price!

[Darth Yoshi]

That's just stupid. Why would you go out into space anyway? It's a quick way to experience osteoporosis.

[Uraniun235]

Yeah, those astronauts that stayed up in space for long periods of time sure are useless cripples now.

Come on. It's space. There are people who would give their left testicle to go up. If I had the money, I'd go. It's the ultimate adventure, going where so few have gone before, rising high above the Earth on a pillar of fire and smoke.

And of course, there's the excellent view.

Where's your sense of romanticism?

[Montcalm]

Maybe this will give the reality shows a new direction,the winning couple will go in space,and as the french expression says "ils vont s`envoyer en l`air"

[YT300000]

Maybe this will give the reality shows a new direction,the winning couple will go in space,and as the french expression says "ils vont s`envoyer en l`air"

True, true.

[Darth Yoshi]

Yeah, those astronauts that stayed up in space for long periods of time sure are useless cripples now.

Took the words right out of my mouth!

As a lazy bum, I'd rather not have my bones lose mass because I really don't feel like doing exercise.

Come on. It's space. There are people who would give their left testicle to go up. If I had the money, I'd go. It's the ultimate adventure, going where so few have gone before, rising high above the Earth on a pillar of fire and smoke.

*shrugs* There are ways to get your dose of adventure without the prospect of eating vacuum.

And of course, there's the excellent view.

I suppose.

Where's your sense of romanticism?

Romanticism is overrated.

[Uraniun235]

Romanticism is overrated.

Haberdash and poppycock.

[EmperorMing]

$5 says Spears is the first space ho.

Didn't that one get anulled within the first 7 hours?

I meant that someone is going to fly her up there and rent her for money. Ho's in space.

I thought the record companies were already doing that...

Back on topic: Are there any takers yet?