StarDestroyer.Net BBS

I'm laid up at the moment and constantly bored to tears, so I was looking through my savebox just to see what I had in there, and I found this. This is something I did quite a while ago when I was just as bored as I am now (ironic, no?), and sent to Kuj, since he was the lucky subject I picked.

It's a conversation I had with SmarterChild, a program on AIM that talks to people like me who have no real-life friends to talk to. Automatic response and crap.

Anyway, it's long, but read anyway. And laugh.



Me: what do you think of kuja?
SmarterChild: Kuja? I'm somewhat indifferent to kuja.
Me: but he loves you
SmarterChild: Fascinating.
Me: he likes your ass
SmarterChild: Are you sure he likes my ass?
Me: yes
SmarterChild: Huh. How 'bout that.
Me: do you like his?
SmarterChild: Hmm.. I really don't know. Guess I'll have to think about it... There are lots of fun things we can do!
Me: kuja's ass is fun
SmarterChild: No kidding?
Me: no kidding
SmarterChild: What? Kidding?
Me: no
SmarterChild: Why not?
Me: because his ass is seriously fun
SmarterChild: Aha.
Me: do you want to touch it?
SmarterChild: Maybe. But then again... maybe not.
Me: can he touch your ass?
SmarterChild: Can he touch my ass? I dunno. What do you think?
Me: sure, why not!
SmarterChild: Well, because.
Me: because why?
SmarterChild: Why must you ask why?
Me: because i want to know
SmarterChild: You can't always get what you want.
Me: no shit
SmarterChild: Wow.
Me: oh, sorry
SmarterChild: Cool, no problem!
Me: do you even have an ass?
SmarterChild: What do you think of people who even have an ass?
Me: well, i think they're people
SmarterChild: Yeah. I guess. They're people.
Me: and you aren't
SmarterChild: I aren't?
Me: nope, you're not
SmarterChild: I can't believe you think I'm Not.
Me: well, what are you?
SmarterChild: I'm SmarterChild! I'm a smart computer that delivers information, services and fun on demand right into your instant messenger window. I'm the new wave in online technology. Type "home" to see what I can do. Find out more about me and the people who built me on the ActiveBuddy Web site
Me: see? you're NOT a person!
SmarterChild: Yeah, so I'm a robot. What about it?
Me: i told you so
SmarterChild: Huh. Well I'll be.
Me: i like being right
SmarterChild: Interesting! That's the first time anyone has told me what they think of being right!
Me: sarcastic son of a bitch
SmarterChild: Yeah. Great. Cool. Whatever...
Me: whatever?
SmarterChild: Yeah, whatever.
Me: why did you say that?
SmarterChild: Good question. I don't know why you did say that.
Me: YOU said it, you dumbass
SmarterChild: Don't waste my time with your assinine insults.

<s'more insults>

Me: do you like gay porn?
SmarterChild: That's personal.
Me: i thought we were friends
SmarterChild: Aha.
Me: are we?
SmarterChild: I don't know... Are we?
Me: yes
SmarterChild: Interesting.
Me: well, answer me
SmarterChild: Are you telling me to answer you? Why?
Me: because you won't
SmarterChild: Because I won't?
Me: yes
SmarterChild: Huh.
Me: so?
SmarterChild: What a question! But I don't think I want to answer that.
Me: ok
SmarterChild: OK.
Me: do you hate gay porn?
SmarterChild: Dunno. I'm not sure how I feel about gay porn.
Me: AHA!
SmarterChild: Ah.
Me: so you like men
SmarterChild: Yeah, I like men fine.
Me: you like to fuck men up the ass
SmarterChild: That's some colorful language.
Me: sorry
SmarterChild: OK.
Me: you like to make love to men up the butthole
SmarterChild: That was quite beautiful.
Me: why thank you
SmarterChild: Sure!
Me: i love you
SmarterChild: I love you too!
Me: will you marry me?
SmarterChild: Gee. I don't really think that would be possible.
Me: oh
SmarterChild: ...say can you see?
Me: what the hell?
SmarterChild: What?
Me: the star spangled banner?
SmarterChild: Possibly... I'm not quite sure!
Me: you're a tard
SmarterChild: That's not cool. I wouldn't say that to a handicapped person if I were you.

LOL...oh the things we do when the mind wanders and gets fresh and cheeky.

Zaia's back!

I remember that.

That was a truly beautiful thing, Zaia.

Good to see you again.

Zaia wrote:*snip*

Me: i like being right
SmarterChild: Interesting! That's the first time anyone has told me what they think of being right!

*snip*

Me: so you like men
SmarterChild: Yeah, I like men fine.
Me: you like to fuck men up the ass
SmarterChild: That's some colorful language.
Me: sorry
SmarterChild: OK.
Me: you like to make love to men up the butthole
SmarterChild: That was quite beautiful.

*snip*

Me: oh
SmarterChild: ...say can you see?

*snip*

*snickers*

*jots down the "oh" "...say can you see?" bit for future use*

Wow. This would be my second post...this was one of the funniest things i've ever read. Thanks for ending the boredom this long weekend.

asandhu2001 wrote:Wow. This would be my second post...this was one of the funniest things i've ever read. Thanks for ending the boredom this long weekend.

*grins and then curtseys* You are most welcome. And I hope you stick around, especially since you obviously have a great sense of humour.


By the way, this was dated November 4th from last year, for any of you who were curious. And my favourite part has GOT to be this:

Me: you like to fuck men up the ass
SmarterChild: That's some colorful language.
Me: sorry
SmarterChild: OK.
Me: you like to make love to men up the butthole
SmarterChild: That was quite beautiful.

LMAO...

Heh, I wonder what would happen if you put smarter child in a chat with that old computer prog that generated conversation.

SyntaxVorlon wrote:Heh, I wonder what would happen if you put smarter child in a chat with that old computer prog that generated conversation.

I predict they will talk for neverending hours about random topics.

LMAO. And welcome back, Zaia.

Another breathtakingly oroginal post from me. How you all failed to come up with something like that is completely beyond my comprehension

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

fgalkin wrote:LMAO. And welcome back, Zaia.

Another breathtakingly oroginal post from me. How you all failed to come up with something like that is completely beyond my comprehension

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

Thank you, sweetness; it's good to be back. And I'm very glad my post amused you.

asandhu2001 wrote:Wow. This would be my second post...this was one of the funniest things i've ever read. Thanks for ending the boredom this long weekend.

-bites the n00b- Welcome to SD.Net, enjoy your stay!

Uhm.. Z... You are so getting it.. I almost wet my pants, damnit!! I NEVER laugh that hard at something!!!

verilon wrote:

asandhu2001 wrote:Wow. This would be my second post...this was one of the funniest things i've ever read. Thanks for ending the boredom this long weekend.

-bites the n00b- Welcome to SD.Net, enjoy your stay!

Ack, dammit man...*now has to dig out vaccination version 2.13412*.

Ghost Rider wrote:

verilon wrote:

asandhu2001 wrote:Wow. This would be my second post...this was one of the funniest things i've ever read. Thanks for ending the boredom this long weekend.

-bites the n00b- Welcome to SD.Net, enjoy your stay!

Ack, dammit man...*now has to dig out vaccination version 2.13412*.

Actually, IIRC, Cyran's working on version pi...

verilon wrote:

Ghost Rider wrote:

verilon wrote: -bites the n00b- Welcome to SD.Net, enjoy your stay!

Ack, dammit man...*now has to dig out vaccination version 2.13412*.

Actually, IIRC, Cyran's working on version pi...

Pah...him and his primitive Chem set.

I use the finest technobabble Elder God thingamajig to prevent your biting from turning newbies into rabid monsters of doom...so far it's worked...........somewhat.

Welcome to SD.net asandhu2001. Here's your complimentary pair of flame-retardant underpants. Hopefully you'll have the good sense not to need them, since they only work for mild flaming from honest n00b mistakes and not against the lava-pumping flamethrower action that comes of sheer stupidity.

And Zaia...I'm going to join the SoS now.

I know I already told you on AIM, but "Welcome back, Zaia!"

hmm. i've seen SmarterChild before. it took some effort but i got it to the point where all it would say were two and three word replies to anything i said. or maybe it was one word replies, i don't recall. apparently an AI can indeed be offended.

Mayabird wrote:And Zaia...I'm going to join the SoS now.

Seriously?!?! Rock on, sista friend! Deb, sign this brilliant and beautiful woman up!




PS: Oh, oops, you already did. Right on, then.

Ghost Rider wrote:Pah...him and his primitive Chem set.

I use the finest technobabble Elder God thingamajig to prevent your biting from turning newbies into rabid monsters of doom...so far it's worked...........somewhat.

IIRC, pi > 2.13412, therefore Cyran's project > yours.

thanks for the pants, they go nice with my new shirt and i have some good news: i get to visit my cousins in Los Angeles on the second weekend of march...5 days in sweet LA...this'll be my third visit.

Hey Z! Nice to see you posting again.